The 12 Best Jokes From Season One of ‘Childrens Hospital’

20 Historical Bad Guys Who Really Weren’t

The Top ‘It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia’ Title Cards That Always Get a Laugh

29 Funny Things We’ve All Done But Don’t Want To Admit To

Muppet Fans Are Angry at Disney, Again

32 Random Bits of Trivia Our Grandmother Pressed Into Our Palm and Said ‘It’s Our Little Secret’

Facts you can easily trade for goods and services

32 Random Bits of Trivia Our Grandmother Pressed Into Our Palm and Said ‘It’s Our Little Secret’

July 27, 2024

Honestly, getting facts from us is a lot like getting cash from your grandma. You pretty much know we’re gonna hand you some whenever we’re around. We hope you like us for more than just our little fact giveaways, but either way, we’re still happy to provide them.

Now run along, and go get your brain something sweet!

Click right here to get the best of Cracked sent to your inbox.

32

CRACKED THE INVENTOR OF THE MACHINE GUN WENT DEAF FROM IT. His son would go on to invent its silencer. — Source

31

CRACKED BEFORE SNL, KYLE MOONEY WAS A WRITER ON NATHAN FOR YOU. It was his first writers room of any kind. — Source

30

CRACKED SCIENTISTS GOT A BUNCH OF BIRDS DRUNK. FOR SCIENCE. It was to see if that made them worse at singing. (It did! Duh.) — Source

29

Reno Loves ‘Reno 911’

CRACKED SHERI THE CITY OF RENO IS RENO 911'S BIGGEST FAN. They even petitioned that the show be brought back after it was canceled by Comedy Central. — Source

28

CRACKED A BLUETOOTH-CONTROLLED VIBRATOR WAS REVEALED TO BE HACKABLE. Customers who bought the vibrator were later entitled to $10,000 each because of this vulnerability. PASSWORD BUT SAB MM the 82 NIK M O 1003 M GREED N N K 20 C AX00 ATTACHI 101 0 09950 AG-CADO BUTH — Source

27

CRACKED IN 1894, A GERMAN MAN HEROICALLY SAVED A SMALL BOY FROM DROWNING IN A RIVER. Only for that little boy to turn out to be Hitler. — Source

26

CRACKED BASC J JOHN STAMOS HAD THE OLSEN TWINS FIRED. Не claims they cried too much during the pilot - however, they were brought back when Stamos determined their replacements were not attractive — Source

25

CRACKED.COM Y! Yahoo seriously underpaid their yodel guy. Pro yodeler Wylie Gustafson got $590.38 for recording Yahoo's trademark yodel - reasonable for a regional commercial, but not for playing it everywhere, like the company started doing. Gustafson sued them for $5 million, and eventually settled for an undisclosed sum. — Source

24

Roombas were already a thing in the '50s. A self-operating floor cleaner was one of the gadgets introduced in Whirlpool's Miracle Kitchen of the Future display, during 1959's American National Exhibition in Moscow. It'd be decades before it became a common thing. CRACKED.COM — Source

23

The NC-17 rating exists because of porn. The MPAA introduced the X rating in 1968 for movies not suitable for children, but neglected to trademark it - so porn started using it. By the '80s, no respectable theater would touch any X- rated movie. So in 1990, the MPAA introduced (and trademark) the NC-17 rating to replace X. CRACKED.COM — Source

22

CRACKED CON Jack Kerouac helped build the Pentagon. Before he became an iconic Beat writer, Kerouac had several jobs in the 1940s - including a gig as a construction worker at the new HQ of the War Department. Не would bring a pint of gin or whiskey to work every day. — Source

21

Georgia O'Keeffe hated that people saw anything sexual in her paintings. O'Keeffe was adamant that she painted flowers, not vaginas. It was photographer Alfred Stieglitz (who eventually became her husband) who began promoting her paintings as softcore porn, against her objections. CRACKED.COM — Source

20

CRACKED.COM IMDb started as a list of hot actresses. The biggest website for film buffs was originally just a list of actresses and their credits compiled on Usenet. The list was later expanded to include actors too, and the whole thing was eventually made available online in 1990. IMDb Fi — Source

19

CRACKED.COM The Navy maintains a forest to service just one ship. The USS Constitution is the oldest ship still afloat - and the U.S. Navy grows a 50,000-acre forest just to maintain it. Every 60 years, the oldest trees are chopped down and turned into new planks for the Constitution. — Source

18

GRACKED.COM Crippled by student loan debt? Thank Albert L. Lord. SHERVE NOTE 60 T As a top officer of the Student Loan Marketing Association (SLMA, or Sallie Mae), Lord did his aggressive best to dominate the student loan market and lobby Congress to keep profits high. Now that his own grandkids are in college, he pontificates about how gosh-darn expensive it is. — Source

17

CRACKED.COM Machiavelli never said, The end justifies the means. Machiavelli was much less Machiavellian than people think. His actual quote from The Prince was more about how power perpetuates itself, as whatever means the powerful use to remain powerful will always be defended as justifiable. — Source

16

A bank robber failed because of his bad handwriting. In March 2021, Alan Slattery from the U.K. handed a note to a bank teller, demanding money and threatening the customers - and walked away empty-handed, as the teller couldn't understand Slattery's handwriting. Не was arrested after trying a couple more times. CRACKED.COM — Source

15

CRACKED.COM Mother Teresás charities were less charitable than usually described. Mother Teresa's legacy has come under examination in light of discoveries like the unsanitary (and not always free of charge) facilities run by her charities. Former Kolkata mayor Bikash Ranjan Bhattacharya has questioned the image she gave of the city as needing to be saved by a white, Catholic woman. — Source

14

CRACKED COM Medieval theologians thought that Jesus was born a tiny man. Since the Bible never says that baby Jesus looked like a baby, some took the liberty of deciding that he was fully formed at birth. That's one of the reasons why medieval art often depicts him as a middle-aged accountant. — Source

13

WHERE EVERYONE HAS A SECRET TRUMP TOWER A NOVEL DONALD J. TRUMP WITH JEFFREY ROBINSON Donald Trump wrote an erotic thriller. Crediting him as the author wasn't exactly truthful, but his fingerprints are still all over the book. The by-product of his attempt to create a soap opera, 2012's Trump Tower narrates the, um, sexy goings-on between (buxom) women and (rich) men happening in Trump's domain. CRACKED.COM — Source

12

Detective Pikachu is a direct sequel to the first Pokémon movie. If you pay attention and know your Pokémon lore, you'll notice that Mewtwo is implied to be the same one from Mewtwo Strikes Back. So there's a Ryan Reynolds-starring sequel to the film where Pikachu cries Ash back to life. CRACKED.COM — Source

11

A party monk's dick is revered in Bhutan. Drukpa Kunley was unlike any Buddhist monk you may know, as he taught that illumination was achieved through sex and booze (and would heavily partake in both). Kunley's dick (referred to as the Thunderbolt of Flaming Wisdom) is a religious symbol today. CRACKED.COM — Source

10

The director's cut of Blade Runner was released because of an odd mistake. EGYANC In 1992, Warner Bros. accidentally sent one cinema Ridley Scott's own cut of the movie -- and people loved that version, so WB eventually released it on video. CRACKED.COM — Source

9

Kids in the US have a disproportionately high amount of the world's toys. Although the country has 3.1% of all children in the world, it consumes way more .. a total of two-fifth of all toys available in the world. CRACKED.COM — Source

8

The guy who invented the safety razor was actually also a utopian thinker. In 1894, King Gillette wrote a book about his plans for a utopian city in which there'd be no money - and therefore, he claimed, no crime. CRACKED.COM — Source

7

Charles Goodyear invented vulcanized rubber by complete accident. Не left some rubber and sulfur on a hot stove and, to his surprise, found that the rubber not only failed to melt but got harder when he turned up the heat. CRACKED.COM — Source

6

Fettuccine Alfredo was brought to the US by a pair of silent movie stars. Mary Pickford and Douglas Fairbanks ate it at the only restaurant in Rome that served it, really liked it, and asked for the recipe -- which they took home. CRACKED.COM — Source

5

There's a researcher who can say with 94% accuracy if a couple will stay together. To do that, Dr. John Gottman needs to spend an hour with the couple and do things like monitoring their breathing and heartbeats as they talk. CRACKED.COM — Source

4

The bicycle was invented because of a famine that killed many horses. In 1816, climate abnormalities led to food shortages, and horses died or were slaughtered for meat-which created demand for a new way to get around. CRACKED.COM — Source

3

Latex

The International Latex Corporation's seamstresses made the Apollo 11 spacesuits. NICE That company, AKA Playtex, had specialized in latex girdles and bras, but decided to branch out into pressurized space suits, thinking it'd be profitable. CRACKED.COM — Source

2

Textbooks are now about 1,000% more expensive than they were in the '70s. As a result, The College Board now tells students they should budget a total of $1,200 per year for course materials including books. CRACKED.COM — Source

1

M*A*S*H actor Wayne Rogers just waltzed off the show, because he could. When he decided to leave, the studio tried to sue him for breach of contract - but then found out he'd never signed a contract anyway. CRACKED.COM — Source

Tags:

Visual

Scroll down for the next article

Must Read

Movies & TV

40 of the Funniest Tweets from the Week of November 18, 2024

Movies & TV

40 Refreshing Bits of Pop-Culture Trivia Tapped From a Glacial Spring by a Planet-Destroying Corporation

Science & History

Five Animals That Went All ‘The Revenant’ on People

Trivia & Jokes

31 Times People Witnessed Absolutely Wild Behavior Behind the Wheel

Trivia & Jokes

43 Random Bits of Trivia We Picked Up Hitchhiking in Orange Jumpsuits About A Block From the Prison

Movies & TV

38 Random Bits of ‘Saturday Night Live Trivia’ That Are Like ‘Chopping Broccoli’ to the Ears

VIRAL ON CRACKED

1

27 Celebrities Who Got Caught With Their Pants Down

2

20 Famous Actors That Didn't Get The Part (For Dumb Reasons)

3

11 Are-You-Kidding-Me Revelations From Celebrity Tell-Alls

4

40 Bizarre Jobs Mike Rowe Wouldn’t Touch With a 10-Foot Pole

5

31 Times People Witnessed Absolutely Wild Behavior Behind the Wheel