30 Awful Work ‘Bonuses’ Worthy of An Immediate Two-Weeks’ Notice

‘A coupon for a cup of coffee… from the coffee shop in the building’
30 Awful Work ‘Bonuses’ Worthy of An Immediate Two-Weeks’ Notice

It’s a gag as old as time — or least since we started giving gifts to one another. You hand your friend a perfectly-wrapped birthday/Christmas/thank-god-you-dumped-him present and wait until they’ve ripped off the wrapping paper, only to utter the classic line: “Surprise! I got you a box!” 

The ongoing dad joke earns eye rolls and groans when done to pals, but has a very different connotation when coming from a large multinational corporation, a lesson one Redditor learned during a lackluster holiday season. “A rep came around and gave everyone in the company a thin black wine bag,” they recalled. Initially excited that they’d get to select a bottle to put in the bag to enjoy at home, their enthusiasm was quickly squashed when the rep clarified there was no wine. “The gift was the bag itself.” 

This sobering experience of receiving a wine bag “bonus” is one of many times companies did their workers dirty, the worst of which involve a poker chip, boss bobbleheads and layoffs for everybody.

bobbysessions449 1mo ago Laid off the crew on Christmas Eve. I was the foreman so he called me first. Asked me to call the rest of the guys and let them know. I said you do it, I don't work for you anymore. - 3.1K Reply ...
ohhhhfcukkkk 1mo ago I worked at a big auction house for people with lots of money, doing manual labor. For Christmas we got a coupon for a cup of coffee.. from the coffee shop in the building. We had free coffee. I still have the coupon, it's a nice reminder of what I walked away from - 5.6K Reply ...
theonlybuster 1mo ago Edited 1mo ago The biggest piece of cake... Worked at a company for 9yrs and through some of its toughest times. I often worked unpaid overtime and went above and beyond. These were some of the highlights the boss pointed out while giving a recognition speech about me. Не ended it with most families save the biggest piece of chicken for the bread-winner, so keeping with that tradition, I'm offering you the biggest and first slice of cake. After being recognized in such a manner, I waited for about a month for an actual monetary bonus. Upon
workscs 1mo ago Target, my annual review got me a.. 8 cent raise! Oh and if they increase the minimum wage you don't keep the 'bonus' haha 640 Reply ...
Fill-Chapo 1mo ago We had 11 workers quit on the spot because they wanted to have a meeting with the COO about their wages and schedules but he shut them down. Office was scrambling to replace them, it was chaos. Later that week they ordered pizza for everyone to show their appreciation for their workers. Pizza doesn't pay my bills - 2.7K Reply ...
yepthisismyaccount 1mo ago A poker chip with APPRECIATION written on it Literally a token of appreciation. 482 Reply ... Kris918 1mo ago I bet someone really thought they were clever with that one. 96 Reply ... + 2 more replies
CurvyTigergirl 1mo ago My old retail job gave us all turkey vouchers for Thanksgiving. When we went to redeem them turned out they were actually $5 off if you bought a turkey worth $25 or more. 869 Reply ... MrsSchneL 1mo ago My old office gave everyone a frozen turkey. I don't know whose genius idea it was but they rolled in a chest freezer and handed out frozen turkeys as everyone is leaving for the day. 303 Reply ...
podolot . 1mo ago Plain white coffee mug that says Amazon, except the n fell off so it says amazo - 282 Reply ...
andymfjAZ 1mo ago After 7 years of being a top 5 employee in my part of the company and no raises, I awarded myself a new company to work for. I was told there wasn't much of a budget for merit increases but they had enough money to hire U2 to play at a с level brunch. 525 Reply ... + 5 more replies
just-another-gringo 1mo ago A Christmas card with signatures of the management team. It was Walmart... .. why the hell do they think the associates would want a picture of the management team? We didn't even want to see the managers when we were working. - 1.4K Reply ...
Acceptable_Prize_544 a 1mo ago More work for doing good work 487 Reply ... + 13 more replies
Ghstfce 1mo ago 00 At my old job before this one, I was promoted. They couldn't give me a raise because the economy, you know how it is, but they sure as hell could saddle me with twice as much work. I was there 3 1/2 years and never received a raise despite exemplary work. So when my coworkers were getting poached by a company we worked with, I threw my hat in the ring and was hired off my initial phone interview. When I handed them my notice, I made sure to say that my decision was based off
saucisse 1mo ago Not me but my mom, who was an elementary school teacher: one year they got...keychains. KEY CHAINS. The teachers put them in a big envelope and sent them back. 411 Reply ... virgilreality 1mo ago A note in the bag: We hope you can get your money back on these because you obviously need it!. 170 Reply ...
New_Bunch_6806 1mo ago o Edited 1mo ago Not me, but years ago, I worked in a call center and can win awards from doing most calls in an hour. This one girl wore long skirts only. She won a ticket to wear jeans but with her culture she doesn't do that. She wore a jeans long skirt and tried turning it and was told it doesn't work on skirts. Whe tried explaining to them that she couldn't wear jeans and that the award given to her was meaningless since she couldn't use it. They basically told her that was a
DLS3141 1mo ago Management had fucked up and their solution was to mandate 90+ hour weeks from everyone for several months. We were told that management will make it right. They announce that the president and CEO is coming to personally thank us and give us a generous bonus. The day comes and sure enough, the guy rolls up in his $300k Mercedes, flaps his gobhole for a bit then has his assistant hand out envelopes with our bonus. The generous bonus? A $25 gift card to wal mart. 188 Reply ...
RabidSeaTurtle . 1mo ago Not me, but a guy in worked with was central to a major technology implementation. At the end they gave him a $5 gift certificate for Baskin Robins. His exact quote to me was it would have been better if they gave me nothing because now they told me my worth. Не was still rightfully salty about it years later. 160 Reply ...
mofa90277 1mo ago A $50 Amazon gift certificate. How could I feel bad about what was basically cash? I was part of a four person team that booked a $26 million software contract for my company, I wrote half of the proposal as software tech lead, and I cleaned up all of the text in the rest of the proposal. The other three were one level above me in the hierarchy, and one of them bought a Lexus with his bonus. 156 Reply ...
Material_Cucumber630 e 1mo ago 5 scratch-off lottery tickets. No winners. 123 Reply ... + 9 more replies
Musclecar123 1mo ago My 5 year service award was a cheap plastic travel mug with the org logo on it. It's the same one we give out for free at events. They put it in a paper bag and filled it up with fancy coloured paper. The bag was worth more than the mug. There was a clear plastic garbage bin outside the venue where we had the event. I tossed it in that as I left. Everyone leaving the venue would have seen it, including the management. 92 Reply ...
Cobzi14 1mo ago I worked throughout the pandemic, coming into contact with people from all over the globe. I'm not allowed to say specifically what my job was but it was in the public sector After the pandemic ended, we were each given a sachet of porridge as a bonus, lucky us 181 Reply ...
hemibearcuda 1mo ago A certificate congratulating me on my 20 yr work anniversary. Literally a piece of paper. My wife has a better story though. The hospital she works at gave them a 50$ gift card for a chain jewelry store. They then taxed her on it as income and deducted it from her paycheck. She doesn't buy or wear jewelry. The gift cost HER money. And the hospital reported record profits that year due to all the layoffs. 309 Reply ...
mackinoncougars 1mo ago A poinsettia AFTER Christmas was over. They used them to decorate the restaurant and then the 'bonus' was they handed them out to employees instead of properly caring or disposing of them. 164 Reply ... + 6 more replies
jiminthenorth 1mo ago Telling me my job is at risk of redundancy, bizarrely when apparently last year was the most profitable year ever. Fuckers. Hope their next shit's a pineapple. 80 Reply ... + 1 more reply
 1mo ago Buddy of mine told me if he hits a certain number on his sales, he gets a jeans pass. Hes allowed to wear jeans for one day, Imao. 160 Reply ... andos4 1mo ago I never understood earning the privilege to wear certain clothes! 74 Reply ...
HalfEnvironmental304 1mo ago Fired everyone in the department but me. Told me I was getting 10% bonus immediately and then another bonus on top of that. Got an email, .25 cent raise applied. I was cleaning out my office 30 minutes later and handed in the biggest professional fuck you resignation letter I've ever written. Was told I would never be paid what I expected, blah blah blah. I now work literally 10 hours a week and make double what I did there. They still call asking how to handle things and I laugh every time. I always tell them
squishsquishsquish30 1mo ago They mailed us a package to show us how much they appreciated us. It included a pen that never worked, a speaker that requires an aux cable and a branded hat from a sponsor...the next day, they announced everyone is being let go 150 Reply ...
AlternativeMessage18 . 1mo ago The boss invited us to his home for a catered Olive Garden lunch. 73 Reply ... + 4 more replies
kittiqueen 1mo ago A walnut cake..... I have a severe allergy to nuts which the whole (small) company knew about 69 Reply ... + 12 more replies
rohlinxeg 1mo ago Large, multinational corporation Christmas gift. A rep came around and gave everyone in the company a thin black wine bag, and we all said ooh, do we get to choose the wine? Nope. The gift was the bag itself. 63 Reply ...
ConsciousnessWizard 1mo ago A chocolate box with 5 small chocolates. To thank us for the release of a product that doubled the company's revenue. - 1.4K Reply ...

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