35 of the Funniest Times People Realized They Were Dating an Idiot

‘They were stacking cups… in the dishwasher’
35 of the Funniest Times People Realized They Were Dating an Idiot

Sometimes, love is so beautiful that it takes a while for you to see the other person for who they really are: an idiot. One Redditor remembered their light-bulb moment, which occurred when their sweetie pie asked them, “What kind of bird is ham?” Another recalled the asinine argument they got into, which began with them saying that they had to leave in “1.5 hours,” and unraveled into a full-on debate that ended with their partner insisting that an hour and a half “is actually 1.3 hours.” 

More of love’s strongest soldiers have recounted the times they dated morons, with an accidental Nazi, a girl who believed denim came from cows and someone who wanted to drive to Hawaii chief among them.

braithgwirod . 8y ago . My ex boyfriend saw a very large lady wearing double denim, then turned to me and said wow, how many cows died for her outfit?! At first I laughed then realised he wasn't really joking and after probing, genuinely believed that denim came from cows. It was the beginning of the end really... + 2.5K ...
suitelogic . 8y ago My buddy dated a girl who thought that the actors in 300 actually were killed in the battle scenes. + 1.8K ...
Lyd_Euh в 8y ago Не tried to tell me that an oxymoron was a cleaning solution. + 4.4K ...
 8y ago She thought Al-Qaeda is a country. She actually expressed interest in visiting it someday. + 5.9K ...
Scared_Confidence_61 e 2d ago . I was dating this girl in the early 2000s. There was an upcoming federal election. She was reading the names on the campaign signs on people's lawns and said wow. Noones voting for Bush .... We live in Canada. 1.3K Reply ...
birdbrainiac 8y ago When i had to explain that you spray mosquito repellent on YOURSELF, not in the air at the mosquitos. For the third time. It's not like wasp spray. Stop fucking wasting it. + 5.4K ...
stay_bronze_horseman 8y ago . Не looked out the car window to check his parking job, then closed it on his own head. + 6K ...
IdleMayhem - 8y ago Не didn't know pickles don't grow out of the ground as pickles. After explaining the whole pickled cucumber situation, he actually didn't believe me at first. We're married, and he's never going to live it down. 346 ...
 E 8y ago When he asked me why my cats haven't started hibernating yet. + 1K ...
fu_kaze . 2d ago At Home Depot. Some sort of chair was $25 for a deal if you get one, $40 for two. She said, oh it's one!.... 1.6K Reply ...
Zestyclose-Quote-376 2d ago When she said she thought we could drive to Hawaii because she said it looked close on a map. She also asked how fish breathe under the ice. She was very pretty 1.8K Reply ...
BartSimps . 2d ago e She encountered a deaf person at her job that day and kept saying death person I gently corrected her and ww3 broke out. 2.1K Reply ...
Banana42 o 2d ago Не insisted that Spain was in South America because they spoke Spanish 2K Reply ...
Handle_Fishsticks 7y ago Sup Bud? When she couldn't understand that Alaska, while part of the USA, is on the upper left hand side of Canada. Then she thought it was part of Canada because, and I'm quoting here, touching it. + 2.3K ...
teenyleemy 8y ago Asked him what event resulted in WWI. His response was 9-11. Не was serious. 1.2K ...
vDukie 8y ago We were watching Django, and during the winter training montage there is a moment where the camera pans over a herd of reindeer. At that moment my ex said something about how she thought it was weird that they would include reindeer in the movie because it kind of breaks the immersion. I was confused and asked what she meant by that. She went on to explain to me how reindeer weren't real animals and just make believe like characters in a fairy tale (aka Rudolph & the rest of Santas reindeer) + 955 ...
Iscariot- 8y ago When she flipped out because her third grader came home with erect on a spelling list, and was on the verge of calling the school. She honestly had lived her entire life not knowing erect had any other use aside from describing a penis. + 3K ...
tedave123 8y ago She got me madlibs and when it was her turn to do a noun she asked What is a noun? I said it's a person, place, or thing. There was a long silence as she thought. It went on for so long that I thought she must be thinking of the best noun I had ever heard. Then she said place. + 7.6K ...
vodiak . 2d ago e It became obvious that she had a poor sense of direction and I asked her which way she thought was north. She pointed up. + 2.6K Reply ...
Shaydie . 8y ago We were driving around this weird part of Las Vegas and I said, This is surreal. Не said, I know. It's so real. I repeated, Surreal and he repeated, So. Real. + 1.6K ...
wutsligma 2d ago . I opened a drawer in my bathroom and noticed a bunch of q-tips scattered all over my hairbrush, towels etc. When I asked him about it, he said he dumped all my q-tips out and threw away the box they came in to help me save space in the drawer... + 3.9K Reply ...
hoesinchokers 2d ago I was going into anaphylactic shock at a restaurant due to unknown allergy. My throat was closing and I had no neck due to swelling. Не asked if I wanted to go outside to get some air. WE WERE SITTING ON THE PATIO. + 5.1K Reply ...
thebradman . 2d ago She asked me if she had to divorce her first husband before we got married. + 4.1K Reply ...
stfupcakes e 2d ago 9 Не played a lot of COD and got a tattoo based on a cool design he saw in the game. It was the Nazi eagle. + 7.5K Reply ...
lostinstasis 0 2y ago When he missed his daily medication, he threw it out instead of just saving it for the next day. + 1.5K ...
DoctorWafle 0 2y ago Stacking cups... In the dishwasher + 21K ...
BabySirloin . 2d ago de I was having bad cramps and I took an Advil. My ex told me I shouldn't take them because it's a gazebo. + 8.9K Reply ...
Distinct_Safety5762 . 2d ago . She seemed to be confused about the difference between flamingos and penguins, but insisted they weren't real because she'd grown up in Alaska and never seen any. + 8.6K Reply ...
wowimnotdeadyet . 2d ago She had a new telescope and thought it would be really cute to check out the stars after a date one night. I don't remember the full conversation but at some point I joked about us being stuck together on this giant ball in space. She looked through the telescope again and said, So you believe that huh? I just stared at her blankly because I was afraid of that question going any further. Anyways, happy to share that we didn't last long but did you guys know that there's totally like, a lot of evidence
Singular_Plurality 2d ago How do oil companies know where to build gas stations? - she thought that there was a gasoline bubble underground that they would tap into and run a line straight to the pump. She was working for Chevron. + 11K Reply ...
IndividualAd2337 2d ago o I told him I had to leave in 1.5 hours. Не told me that was oddly specific and I should have rounded up to 2 hours instead of 1 hour and 50 minutes. I clarified that I had to leave in 1 hour and 30 minutes and he said that's actually 1.3 hours. + 9.1K Reply ...
dude_stfu . 2d ago What kinda bird is a ham? was hard to ignore. + 18K Reply ...
msslagathor 9 2d ago Asked me to use smaller words (the word I used? demographic) + 3.7K Reply ...
LadyShylock . 2d ago E When he asked my grandmother if she'd ever had children. + 12K Reply ...
QuixoticQueen 8y ago Edited 8y ago Не thought procrastination meant overthinking. Disillusioned meant one didn't have enough light to see. Disenchanted meant one had stopped chanting. The list goes on and on. The funniest part is he couldn't understand why we had so much miscommunication. Edit: I just sent him a text using the word 'assumption', I wonder if he is going to think I'm suggesting anal. + 3.1K ...

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