30 of the Funniest Excuses People Gave for Speeding

‘I just got a haircut’
30 of the Funniest Excuses People Gave for Speeding

It’s rare to get away with speeding, but as some of these Redditors will tell you, it is, in fact, possible. For instance, one guy was let off with a warning after telling the cop that he “just wanted to see how fast the car could go.” Another got out of a ticket by informing a state trooper of the “10 percent rule,” which indicates that drivers are allowed a buffer of going 10 percent over the speed limit because of possible technical issues with speedometers or speed guns. 

Feel free to try your luck with some of these excuses, just know that not everyone gets away with putting the pedal to the metal — take it from the bride who was running just a tad late to her own wedding.

MikeHazeGaming 12y ago My friend is a paraplegic and has distorted limbs. Him and his friends were in a car driving home from an event speeding like mad men. They got pulled over and the driver told the officer there friend was in an accident. The cop flashed his light at the paraplegic, ran back to the car, and escorted them to the hospital. After the escort the cop drove away. 11 ...
OGIVE 12y ago I was a Boy Scout until I was 18. Four times I got out of a speeding ticket because I was in a Boy Scout uniform. One of those times I blew past the cop at 90 in a 45 zone. When the cop caught up to me I told him I am late to a Boy Scout meeting Officer Не roundly chastised me for my speed and let me go. 31 ...
celinesci 12y ago I got pulled over on my way to my wedding. I was wearing my veil, was all made up, everything but the dress. I was given a very hefty ticket :( 11 ...
doesntgive2shits 12y ago I know this girl in my class who has gotten out of six tickets now by just crying. 4 ...
bourbon4breakfast 6y ago Indy ex-expat Back in high school, I used to keep a bible in my car so that if I got pulled over, I could say I was late to Youth Group. Worked twice... 3 ...
PirateKingRadical 12y ago I was pulled over while working a delivery shift at jimmy johns. i sped up to make the traffic lights and flew right past a cop going 20+ over the speed limit. When he approached my vehicle he asked me how if i knew how fast i was going. my reply was Freaky Fast and he let me off with a warning. 3 ...
xmiitsx87 . 5mo ago I've used a variant of I just got the car back running a few times. Driving a relatively rare sportscar can have some perks. 1 Reply ...
bernardhops 12y ago Not a cop, but an awesome excuse my wife used to get out of running a red/yellow light. Cop was behind her when she went through a late yellow which turned red, gets pulled over and says to the cop I thought you wanted to make the light also cop just walked away. 3 ...
Damocles2010 12y ago My uncle tells a story that he got off a ticket by telling the cop that there was a spider in his speedo and he was chasing it with the needle... POSTCRIPT: Spiders in Australia are very dangerous... 11 ...
ChaplnGrillSgt 5y ago As a highschooler, I got pulled over after curfew one night. The cop asked me why I was driving so fast and I said I was trying to get home before curfew. When asked why I didn't leave earlier I told him I was too busy making out with my girlfriend. Really didn't want to leave. Не laughed and then said Just be safe, kid. Still ticketed me but bumped the speed down to avoid reckless charges and told me to make sure I fought it in court because it would probably get tossed. Не was right.
callthewambulance 0 12y ago Not a police officer, but a friend of mine was pulled in South Carolina for going something like 84 in a 60 prior to the USC/UGA game a month ago. Told the trooper he was running late for the tailgate (we always relied on his pickup truck), officer let him go scot-free and said slow down a bit son, go cocks. Lucky bastard. 59 ...
balance_harmony 5y ago I was pulled over by a state trooper. I told the cop about the 10% rule, where drivers are allowed a 10% buffer over the posted speed limit because of possible technical errors in the speedometer. I was let off with a warning. 22 ...
GoogleBeforeGoogle 12y ago Guy I knew got pulled over in NYC doing 142 MPH on the freeway at around 2AM. The cop asked him what he was doing going that fast. Guy's response: ...I just... I just wanted to see how fast the car could go. Lucky bastard got away with it. Cop said (after he finally stopped laughing) that it was the most honest answer he had ever heard and let him go. 145 ...
SecretCollector 5y ago My cousin is a police officer who works at the border between Canada and the United States, as well as some patrolling in the Niagra Falls area. Не pulls over a speeder one day. The excuse the speeder had was that he thought you couldn't get pulled over in Canada for speeding and that it was just an American thing the government made up to keep control over the citizens. 24 ...
VictorKruger . 5y ago Pulled over a lady speeding in a school zone during the time when busses and kids were arriving in the morning. The first thing she said to me was: Do you know how hard it is to drive with no hands? 37 ...
Pantsman1084 . 5y ago My wife tried to tell an officer that she had to speed up to get up the hill... She was doing 58 in a 35... In a school zone (thankfully at night)... Didn't work. 41 ...
SometemoS . 5y ago I'm american. Was driving in Canada and got pulled over for speeding. Played stupid and pretended I thought the 100km/hr speed limit signs were in less per hour. Got off... 89 ...
reve-dore 5y ago My grandpa was a no-bullshit kind of guy. I can't remember exactly why, but he needed to get to the hospital very quickly. Officer pulls him over clocked at a little over 100mph. Cop comes up to the window and my grandpa says look I know you pulled me over because I was speeding but now that we're stopped I'm going to have to resume at 150mph to make it on time Cop let him go and gave him an escort 691 ...
sun-bru 5y ago Last week i got done doing 25km over and said I wasn't speeding, I just got a haircut and it makes me look fast. It didn't work. 607 ...
The_Black_Python 5y ago e Edited 5y ago Not a сор, but I work for an old man who used to be in the air force. For a while he was stationed in newfound land I think and he had no drivers licence but he owned a car. Не was doing 90 in a 60 and the cop that pulled him over said you were really flying there, let me see your piolts license. So he showed him his piolts licence and was let off with a warning. 239 ...
MeaganTheDragon 5y ago Not a cop but my dad got pulled over for speeding in a little town. Right as the cop comes up my sister, who was probably 3 at the time, starts bawling in the backseat. Like, screaming. My two other siblings and I are rolling our eyes and covering our ears and he gives the cop an apologetic look and says We're just trying to get home. This was also like 10pm at night after visiting family an hour away. The cop let us go with a warning and conveniently my sister stopped crying a little ways
SSjGRaj D 5y ago A cop pulled over my uncle on the highway and asked why he was speeding. My uncle told the cop that his daughter is in the hospital. She is a Medical Student interning. 429 ...
joey_p1010 5y ago My cousin has told me this story about his grandmother: She got pulled over on I-95. She feigned ignorance, and acted in your stereotypical old person ways, while claiming she thought that I-95 was the speed limit. Не let her go. 1.5K ...
Themapples07 5y ago Just finished officiating a small town high school basketball game. It was a rivalry game that while the outcome was never in question got pretty heated between the two teams. Home team won but the home coach also received a technical late in the game. On the way out of town with my со official I got up to highway speeds prior to the city limit sign which was way out of the town surrounded by fields. The officer who had been at the game looks at us and say Y'all were the refs at the game
what-in-the-actual 5y ago Edited 5y ago My dad, who is now retired, pulled over a young woman for speeding and he said as soon as he got up to her window, she said Fuck, I am so sorry! She jumped out of her car and booked it to the side of the road while pulling down her pants and shit just exploded out of her. My dad then proceeded to nope the fuck out without even giving her a verbal warning. I used his story in a college essay about how to avoid getting tickets. Thanks for the 4.0, dad.
5y ago Not a cop, but my dad once got pulled over with my little sister and I in the car, and his excuse was that his kids really needed to pee. Unprompted, my sister, who was like five at the time, chimed in with it's okay daddy, I just went in my pants a little bit! Cop let him go. 5.1K ...
5y ago My dad was a сор. Не told me how he pulled over an old man for speeding and the gramp was yelling you pulled me over because you KNOW I have biscuits in the oven at home and they are BURNING now because of you! 3.8K ...
antonios_mom 5y ago Got pulled over for speeding and when I rolled down my window a bee flies in, I proceeded to freak the fuck out and actually hit the officer with the car door in my rush to get out of the car, told him I was allergic to bees and didn't have an epi pen with me, he actually got in my car and shooed the bee out, only warning I got was to carry an epi pen with me. I'm not allergic to bees 1.5K ...
Zakkx3 5y ago Obligatory not a cop But when my twin brother and I were born, my brother had a lot of deficiencies, to say, and one night his testicles swelled up to the size of a softball ( he was like 1, the balls on this kid man). This of course warranted a speeding trip to the hospital without dialing 911, and we were pulled over maybe half a mile from the house. Roughly 20 minutes from the closest hospital, the cop yells at us at how crazy we were to be going that fast to which my dad yelled
12y ago If you're in Florida, the best excuse you'll probably hear is I'm an off-duty police officer, so don't arrest me. 13 ...

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