15 of the Funniest Pick-Up Lines

A classic
15 of the Funniest Pick-Up Lines

When a pick-up line is bad, it’s god awful — look no further than Tom Cruise’s seedy leather vest-wearing pick-up artist in Magnolia. But when a pick-up line is good? It’s a majestic, impressive display of horny artistry. Redditors have reflected on times they heard pick-up lines so good they were actually impressed. Whether you’re swiping on the apps or catching someone’s gaze from across the bar, here are some pick-up lines you might want to add to your rotation. 

Also, it’s important to remember that sometimes good flirting is as simple as asking, “Do you mind if I sit here and hit on you for a while?”

lez3ro . 5y Are you looking for the best sex of your life girl? No Then I'm your guy! ... 579
Douglasqqq . 2y I invited a girl out to a nice dinner for a third or fourth date once and she asked Do I have to sleep with you after? and I said No. You get to sleep with me after. ... 129
turfherder . 5y My wife and I were at a party once and she was chatting with this dude who was really nice but seemed to be getting a little flirty. So she called me over, and said, oh by the way, this is my spouse turfherder And without missing a beat he says, that's ok, I don't get jealous. ... 804
Quantumspicy . . 2d Let's go shopping at my place, clothes are 100% off ... Reply 2.7k
TnT54321 . 2d When I was still using the apps, I matched with a lady that was still in med school. We had been chatting it up for a few days but unable to meet up in person due to her busy schedule. thought I was being witty and asked, what kind of illness could I have so I can spend time with you at the hospital?. Her response? Hahaha that's cute, I'm in neuro so it'll have to be a very traumatic brain injury. We never met up in person. ... Reply 3.2k
Dylzi . 2d From a random girl on bumble just after halloween Hey, aren't you a little late for halloween ? Why are you still dressed up as the love of my life ? ... Reply 1.7k
delightfullylifeless. 2y Best one I've seen: guy stands next to girl. Steps back and points down like something fell on the floor, getting her attention Looks like you dropped your standards - Hi. I'm Troy. ... 137
Jillredhanded . 2d I told my husband on our first date that I had traveled twenty years back in time to settle a bet on where we first met. ... Reply 1.3k
AceBob666. 2d Me pointing.....Hey, see my friend over there? Her yeah ME Не really wants to know if you'll kiss me ... Reply 707
shalomie_bologna . 5y I've used one pickup line in my life. Ironically, two girls at a bar I was working at were discussing pick up lines, and asked me for my favorite one. I took one of the girls by the hand, looked her in the eye, and said, The only reason I'd kick you out of bed...would be to fuck you on the floor. I had read it online once and thought it was hysterical. It worked. I wish it hadn't. That girl was crazy. ... 981
Evening_Pattern_7332 . 2 2d Heard someone say I wish I was as tall as you are, could I borrow a few inches? ... Reply 1.6k
® DE wolemid 2d The one and only time I've ever had a chat up line used on me. Her: Do you like stuff? Me: Yeah, I like stuff. Her: Great we got something in common, let's fuck ... Reply 2k
PM_ME_YOUR_BEE_SYRUP . 5y Do you mind if I sit here and hit on you for a while? Also, casually slipping them Taco Bell hot sauce packets with suggestive sayings. ... 1.2k
LemonadeLala . 5y I was walking around the produce section of the grocery store when I was about 21, and this man (prob in his 70's) suddenly approached me. Не goes, Whatever you do, don't go in the frozen food aisle! I was caught off guard and said, What? Why? And he broke out into a grin and said, Because you'll melt EVERYTHING! I just burst out laughing. Still makes me smile to this day.
agbmom 3d I was walking from class to my car and some guy was jogging after me saying Excuse me, excuse me miss! And I turned around and he said you dropped this and was holding out a piece of paper...I know I didn't have any loose paper and I said Sorry, that wasn't me and he said Ya but it has my number on it and I thought you should have it It was bold to assume I wanted it but he exuded confidence in a not cocky way and it would have worked if I wasn't in a
Scroll down for the next article
Forgot Password?