25 Burns and Comebacks That Scorched the Earth of TV History

Thankfully none of these were directed at us
25 Burns and Comebacks That Scorched the Earth of TV History
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Because we simply write about TV and movies, we sometimes feel a little left out. This isn’t one of those times. Today, we’re glad that we were just onlookers while some of the funniest TV characters faced off in a duel of wounding words. Our fragile egos couldn’t even handle catching a stray. 

Here are some of the funniest direct and indirect burns and comebacks in TV history…

Community

... TELL US NOW. COMMUNITY Submitted by Noah U., You are the AT&T of people. CRACKED.COM

Ed, Edd n Eddy

... TELL US NOW. ED, EDD N EDDY Submitted by Tanya W., Your garden is overgrown and your cucumbers are soft! CRACKED.COM

The Golden Girls

... TELL US NOW. THE GOLDEN GIRLS Submitted by Stephanie N., Sophia: May you put your dentures in upside down and chew your head off! Angela: May your legs have grown old and gnarled and withered like an olive branch! Sophia: May your moles grow hair thicker than Jerry Vale's! Angela: May your marinara sauce never cling to your pasta! CRACKED.COM

Buffy the Vampire Slayer

... TELL US NOW. BUFFY THE VAMPIRE SLAYER Submitted by Robert E., Nice dress. Good to know you've seen the softer side of Sears. CRACKED.COM

Angel

A character on Joss Whedon's show Angel hates some of Whedon's work. Fred's mother says her husband loves the Alien films, except for that last one they made; I think he dozed off. That's Alien: Resurrection, for which Joss Whedon wrote the script. CRACKED.COM

Family Guy

Through his own creations, Seth MacFarlane called himself a talentless douche. 199 At the end of the Family Guy special It's a Trap, some of the Griffins start ripping on Seth MacFarlane, for no reason. Chris says, For example, me, I think Seth MacFarlane is a douche. Не adds, Talented? Не ripped off The Simpsons. Lois joins in: Yeah, he watched TV in the '80s. We get it. Then they keep going. CRACKED.COM

30 Rock

In 30 Rock, Tina Fey called herself a judgmental bitch. copyright ©2010 nbc studios, inc. - - - all rights reserved. adidas During a credits sequence, Liz is going through possible names for Jack's daughter. The last name suggested is Christina, and the episode ends with a shot of Liz saying, I don't know about Christina. Cuz then everyone calls her Tina, and every Tina I've known is a real judgmental bitch. CRACKED.GOM

Community (Again)

CRACKED COMMUNITY G Pe ABED COMPLETELY DESTROYS HILARY DUFF After discovering Abed has a natural gift for roasting, Britta and Annie sick him on the mean girl, Meghan (Hilary Duff), and Abed just scorches her and her minions.

30 Rock (Again)

... TELL US NOW. 30 ROCK S G T WITH TRACY HOROP Submitted by Noah U., Listen up, fives. A ten is speaking. CRACKED.COM

Sherlock Holmes

... TELL US NOW. SHERLOCK HOLMES Submitted by Lydia В., Anderson, don't talk out loud. You lower the IQ of the entire street. CRACKED.COM

SpongeBob SquarePants

... TELL US NOW. SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS Submitted by David А., If I had a dollar for every brain you didn't have, I'd have one dollar. CRACKED.COM

Frasier

... TELL US NOW. FRASIER Submitted by Jerry D., Niles: Are you calling me pretentious? Daphne: You'd eat a worm if it had a French name! CRACKED.COM

Married... With Children

... TELL US NOW. MARRIED WITH CHILDREN Submitted by Mike R, Peggy: Did you miss me? Al: With every bullet so far. CRACKED.COM

Parks and Recreation

CRACKED WE COULD DO AN ENTIRE LIST OF APRIL'S JERRY BURNS. PARKS & REC Can you photoshop your life with better decisions, Jerry?

Parks and Recreation (Yep, More Jerry Burns)

CRACKED PARKS & REC JERRY GERGICH DOESN'T HAVE TO SAY A WORD After all the ribbing that Jerry Gergich has endured, Dr. Harris reveals that Jerry has the biggest penis he has ever seen. Now we know why Jerry hasn't gone postal. Не knows.

The Office

CRACKED MICHAEL SCOTT PUTS TOBY ON BLAST (THEN BLAST AGAIN). THE OFFICE If I had a gun with two bullets, and I was in a room with Hitler, Bin Laden, and Toby, I would shoot Toby twice.

Community (One Last Time)

CRACKED WHEN TROY SAID BRITTA WAS ALL THE BAD THINGS. COMMUNITY You are human tennis elbow. You are a pizza burn on the roof of the world's mouth. You are the opposite of Batman.

Bob’s Burgers

CRACKED LOUISE ROASTS (ACTUALLY, BAKES) JESSICA. BOB'S BURGERS Bland, boring Jessica. If she was a spice, she'd be flour. If she was a book, she'd be two books.

Absolutely Fabulous

CRACKED EDWINA HASN'T WARMED UP TO SAFFY. ABSOLUTELY FABULOUS She's so cold, I bet she has her periods in cubes.

Triumph, the Insult Comic Dog

Which of these buttons calls your parents to pick you up? - Triumph, the Insult Comic Dog talking to a man in a Darth Vader suit at the premiere of Star Wars: Attack of the Clones. CRACKED.COM

Tazz on Jim Ross

I'd love to slap you across your face, but it looks like God already beat me to it. WWE wrestler Tazz insulting legendary commentator Jim ROSS. CRACKED.COM

Stephen Hawking on John Oliver

25 Burns and Comebacks That Scorched the Earth of TV History

Homeland

Graffiti artists were asked to decorate the Homeland set. الوطن كافكا تطبيع so they wrote Homeland is racist. Producers of the series, which is notorious for its unflattering depiction of non-white characters, wanted to film scenes that took place in Syria. So they asked set decorators to add Arabic graffiti for authenticity. The artists obliged by writing a number of messages critical of the series on the walls. Nobody noticed until the episode aired. http://www.notey.com/@theintercept unofficial/extemal/7234826/interview-with-heba-yehia- CRACKED.COM

The Dead Pool

In The Dead Pool, Molly Fisher is brutally killed. She's a shout-out to a film critic. Critic Pauline Kael called Dirty Harry fascist, pro-violence, pro-gun, conservative nuttery garbage. So in the Dirty Harry sequel The Dead Pool, producers based a character on her, and then had that character get brutally stabbed to death. That'll show her who's pro-violence! CRACKED.COM https://www.newsreview.com/sacramento/oritics-cameo/content?oid=1314065

Invader Zim

Invader Zim had a test subject named Nick. KITCHEN Nick was short for Nickelodeon. Creator Jhonen Vasquez wanted Invader Zim to be very dark. Nickelodeon didn't agree. Vasquez expressed his frustration by creating Nick, whose happiness implant made him cheerful at all costs. That's how he saw the network-happy and upbeat no matter what, as if the critical thinking part of their brains had been hijacked. CRACKED.COM http://zim. .wikia.com/wiki/Nick

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