58 of the Funniest Tweets from the Month of August 2025

‘Microwaves be like: Here is your hot plate of cold rice’
58 of the Funniest Tweets from the Month of August 2025

This month, news broke that $40 million in annual losses (supposedly) and some Donald Trump jokes might not be the only reasons behind Stephen Colbert’s late-night cancellation. 

Paramount higher-up George Cheeks hinted that comedian Taylor Tomlinson’s decision to leave After Midnight played a role in the network’s decision to axe The Late Show earlier this summer. Both series had been renewed for new seasons prior to their respective cancellations, but Tomlinson’s choice to depart her show made Cheeks realize that Paramount “couldn’t stay in that daypart.”

As folks try to decipher what, exactly, Cheeks meant by that statement, there’s no mistaking how John Oliver feels about Dean Cain’s decision to join ICE. “There’s an old saying in Hollywood,” Oliver said during a recent episode of Last Week Tonight. “‘If all you can get is Dean Cain, you are fucked.’”

The joke sparked laughter from the show’s studio audience, but Cain wasn’t nearly as amused, accusing Oliver of stealing one of his jokes “from the internet.” “He also laughed hysterically when Trump said he was going to run for President,” Cain wrote on Twitter. “Case closed.” 

Unlike Cain’s apparent attempt at a roast, these tweets are actually funny. This month’s best posts included those about an octopus dentist, Pink Pantheress’ double take and the first jaywalker.

bella @earlygirl__ 17h S ... I had the smallest imaginable edible and now I can't stop laughing at how my husband's shadow at this wine bar rn makes it look like I'm sitting across from a golden retriever 295 10K 290K del 2.9M
Sam Herbst @smhrbst.8/11/25 ... Well Ma has a gun cheater griffin @Mate... 8/11/25 Who's clearing who? 844 22K del 614K
Matt @mattmin29.2h s ... HELP i was literally in a management meeting when my coworker leaned to me and said taylor swift is engaged. KE M Ca 1.4K 26K 245K 29
julia @glitterjuj 16h ... as a school librarian. we know dave @davepiojos.1 1d just realized i never paid back that book in high school GIF 140 2.5K 149K 4.4M
Frog @ColdEmpanadas1 1d my favorite genre of tweet is conservative guy asking grok is this true and then arguing with it when it doesn't give him the answer he likes 551 15K 237K 4.4M
taha @KhanStopMe.1 1d ... as you can see the circle will be bigger with gpt-5 Aidan McLaughlin @aida... 1d getting pretty nostalgic for the future GPT-5 GPT-4 144 1.8K 105K 1.7M
pinkpantheress @pinkpanth... 8h s ... opened the app too quick and thought this was me Miley Nation @MileyNati....1 17h HANNAH MONTANA: 20TH ANNIVERSARY. 2026. ut YNA ON 443 11K 257K 4.3M
bay @pale_atlantis 1d liking sports is great because you'll have a bad day then here your team comes to make it worse 232 22K 134K 3.6M
doomer did a facebook marketplace deal with a @uncledoomer 17h baby boomer and he paid me with vintage bandos s ... FEDERAL 1000 100 ENOTE THE UNITED C AMERICA RECEIVED THIS NOTE V LEGAL TENDER FOR ALL DEBTS PUBLIC AND PRIVATE VAULT 02 JUL 8 1991 WASHINGTON.D.C. 2 NED ERA 1000 100 ENOTE FAMERICA 100 WASHINGTON,D.C. 1 1 Katherine Savalor Osteya the Dated Value 1000 SERIES 1985 Baber I aus 0001 100 ONEHO Temous 2000 1000 Сто LLARS 000 J 100 312 377 33K 832K
SOON bed zzz @bearsoc... 22h s ... I'm at build-a-bear straight up building it, and by it, haha, well. Let's jusr say. My Bat 1 I it S I y I g y 49 1.5K 28K 304K
Invis @invis4yo. 1d S ... Learn why people trust wikiHow PSYCHOLOGICAL HEALTH >> STRESS MANAGEMENT How to get through tough times user000000 wikiHow 1. Remember that at least you're not pregnant 212 20K 149K 4.4M
kennedi @kkennnedi i.22h going to war. (cleaning out my closet) 89 11K 68K del 1.7M
Natalie @jbfan911.20h Ok I cheated in school but I did it the hard way and without Al 199 16K 170K 2.8M
lukiss @7UKISS.1 16h ALEXAG 7 men used to go to war well now we suck toes 318 7K 62K 2.1M
Brooks Otterlake @i_zzzzzz.20h s ... When you ask Mr. Hammerhand to look after your 300 walnuts while you go grab lunch Massimo @Rainmaker1973.1d 66-year-old Mr. Hammerhand has shattered expectations-crushing 293 walnuts in 60 seconds, all while holding a raw egg in his striking hand: world record. MR HAMMERHAND 40 1.6K 43K du 1.1M
nova @MelanatedMupp... .1d s ... hx3ste_69 2 years ago female orgasms,,,, the best sound of the planet,,, after my chemical romance of course :) 1 Reply danielle @fyridk.1d any porn site that allows comments is instantly funny because like why is that there 81 8.5K 95K 2M
Ole Miss Fraternity Rush А... 12h s ... Just saw this on facebook marketplace THIS SKIBIDI RIZZLER IS 8 NO CAP BRUH 188 78 530 112K 962K
ARRORD julia @CatgirlAnarcho - 12h s ... SNIFFING THEIR ARMPITS 76 4K 31K del 639K
jayocob edebirson stan ac... 21h s ... europeans coming to american Walmart's for the first time: Man Carrying Thing @Man... ..2d just saw Weapons 29 1.7K 31K 641K
a @aallleeexxxxxx1 -1 1d ... he must've seen my dm Pop Base @PopBase.2d Jacob Elordi and Olivia Jade have broken up, PEOPLE reports. 106K 3.4M 43 3K
Pope Leo XIV @tykemowers.1 1d s ... how it feels to be called girl by a bad bitch 93 4.8K 71K 1.4M
hope @LAINLAIN. 1d ... ok. thanks dad What should look for in a used car? Toyota Carolla toyota corolla duckduckgo.com hope @LAINLALN.1 1d What does one look for in a used car.. 380 2.1K 3.7M 106K
do xie @doxie_gay.10h O ... hm RAWR! FIALATOS LIBRE DE PRODUCTO SEGURO 420 2.1K 30K 1M
The Notorious J.O.V. @wh....- 1d s ... this is so valid Trying to watch a superhero movie w/o + stressing about the infrastructure damage to 392.6K the city ... 1,604 398K 537 34K 7.2M
VENGEANCE @BatSource1 - 1d s ... Batman will reportedly appear in The Batman Part Il THE BATMAN PART II 716 4.1K 65K 1.5M
Timmy :) @Timmyd124.1 1d don't be coming in my house pouring no big cups of juice 500 8.4K 93K 4.1M
@toxiklostmotion 14h s ... Sc tty If you can't beat em, join em 410 6.5K 60K 1.8M
s ... Cold Negus @ColdNegus 23h Chan @FanBoyAndChan1d My feet are always frozen 454 15K 176K 13M
arvo färt @arvofart.9h ... The Matrix (1999), dir. Lana and Lily Wachowski Cat @KittyBombBee 1d Everything is computer Everybody transgender 8 2.5K 21K 418K
anirudh @kamathematic 1d being the first to jaywalk is so aura inducing the other pedestrians all look at each other like damn he's really him 60 2.6K 41K del 851K
Wraith LaFrentz @WraithLa... 14h s ... Devil on my shoulder: it's Friday night. Have 7-10 beers. Come on do it you know you want to Angel on my shoulder: only have 3-5 beers 31 1.1K 19K 396K
Bola Montana @borlah_m . 21h Microwaves be like: here is your hot plate of cold rice 242 6.5K 35K 788K
Crispy T @CrispyTesticl... 22h s ... Me explaining to my dentist (who is an octopus) the issues with my teeth: Neb | @NebsGoodTa... 22h Superman (2025) GIF 91 8.9K 155K 3.6M
coffee @ModernWrighty.1d G ... ???? Ena 3: miau @enamiau.1d man i love coffee Y eb ON IDA COVID absber 261 Y ,6lleb Bl o bebiev 6 eb the OTHER eb 606g eloid .etnslobs shib 98 eup eum cco ,0129 obneioib Y Misdoo 6 ed is eup obneimet .eig د ònebro sib omeem leups Y ... в 9 10 гоб sorto ПОО ,ortons2 Y / lonse eup eb , Bysiq el ne eup DY sup eauty dibeoue , .081692 notnA nob oaivA .otaiv sided гв sbiv U2 no g noo shouq SNU endoa others olv urt US B ashev в nvell 9b
Jenny Nicholson @JennyENi... 1d s ... So when it got shut down there were like a million health code violations but my favorite was that one of the employees was stirring a vat of coleslaw with their arms submerged in coleslaw 5 inches past gloves, just elbow deep in the slaw Ethan Hershaft @EthanHers... .1d Dragon Fire grill at Busch Gardens has reopened after a recent closure! Glad to see @BuschGardens work on this fast to have this amazing restaurant open to all guests again! DRAGONFIRE DRAGONS Music BE ICONS SHOWDICS GDOG DRAGON Eat & Drive AUG 100-1 Capsus - DRAGON
Luis Vercetti @97Vercetti.19h G ... when I take too many shrooms & start opening up to my labubu 113 5.6K 81K 1.6M
SAMPLE Chris A @AlsikkanTV1 13h I saw someone try boba for the first time and she choked three times in a row and then the dude she was with was like you gotta stop 148 4.7K 135K 2.8M
Sacho @ksm6971 - 1d ... USPS M1A1 UNITED STATES POSTAL SERVICE 64_ISAACS RUFF DAY 370 4.3K 52K 969K
lily ... @hondacrvthe3rd told my psychiatrist my antidepressants were making me unfunny and he said, there are more important things and i kind of disagree:/ 1:03 AM Aug 3, 2025 2.2M Views 175 8.4K 143K 2.9K
Janel Comeau @VeryBadLlama Aug 2 ... my grandmother worked in a nylon factory to buy her children hairspray that ate a hole clean through the ozone layer Kiera @kieralwellness Aug 1 Toxins your grandmother wasn't exposed to in her fertile years: - Nail salons - Artificial perfumes - Fake tan -Botox... Show more 93 2.5K 70K del 1.1M
O ... Cyrus/Marcy @shikinatorr Aug 3 Customers give me religious pamphlets all the time at work but this is like uncovering a lost renaissance painting Most people rejected His message. But His m here was Shut up! to g They hated Jesus because Gal. 4:16 Не told them the truth. 15 INC del 663K 122 5.1K 73K
nai @nairahamni Aug 3 ... this my last day talking, going ferb! 31 9.9K 42K 957K
rated @imyrated 12h ... How I feel when I double-tap my AirPods to skip a song ANTAR - GRUPE - I 126 16K 175K del 2.9M
julia @CatgirlAnarcho . Aug 2 0 ... @cuckcat me when the weed tell me to start meowing @cuckcat 14 1.7K 15K del 297K
G ... bug girl @buggirl Aug 2 school bus @ShouldHaveCat. Aug 1 Why you should have a cat He's fully charged 84 7.3K 208K 2.7M
MILO????? II comms open @mintiliciouss Aug 2 ... Is this good AW MAN THAT REALLT RUBS SALT IN THE WOUND Guy who's a cannibal: can you rub paprika in the wound also 56 5.7K 52K del 502K
Yoncé Vocals @YonceVocals 11h G ... Fan account Barack turned the other way like that's his family COWBOY CARTER Updates @B7Album Aug 4 The Carters & the Obamas at the 2016 White House Easter Egg Roll 407 7.7K 108K 3.4M
Naut @nautfcb 21h O ... that's clearly a woman - @BHAFCWomen Aug 4 Brighton & Hove Albion Women Officially a Seagull! HTON & HOV AMERICAN EXPRESS Kisswee AMERICAN EXPRESS Kassammee AMERICAN EXPRESS AMERICAN EXPRESS RICAN AMERICAN Kis RICAN PRESS EXPRESS PRESS AMERICAN Kissimmee AMERICAN AMERICAN EXPRESS EXPRESS AMERICAN EXPRESS AMERICAN the Kissummee AMERICAN EXPRESS AMERICAN EXPRESS EXPRESS - BRIGHTON RICAN Les PRESS - AMERICAN UCAN EXPRE M DOS Vissa AM AMERICAN EXP EXPRESS AMERICAN ERI EXPRESS EXPRESS 238 8.7K 197K del 6.7M
horse s ... @horsetwting 18h DROPPED MY APPLE 58 2.5K 35K 527K
... @fleuraeda being academically smart has never stopped me from being an idiot 7:16 PM Aug 3, 2025 1.9M Views 61 7.6K 30K 1.2K
Owl @OwlHouseIsGreat Aug 4 G ... Sir... Why did we just find several videos of you with Jeffrey Epstein the moon suspiciously: II GIF NEWS NewsWire WIRE @NewsWire_US Aug 4 U.S. TO ANNOUNCE PLANS TO BUILD NUCLEAR REACTOR ON MOON 48 6.6K 107K del 1.1M
duck @ExtremeBlitz_. 19h s ... when you thought your brother was showering bc it's been 30 mins already... but then the toilet flushed and he just started his shower ExtremeBlitz 0:11 122 1.7K 51K 1.2M
amelia elizalde ... @ameliaelizalde still thinking about the girl on here who went to a party outside the bay area and was shocked to discover that nobody cared she was a software engineer 8:58 PM Aug 5, 2025 8M Views 509 7.8K 230K 11K
O Alex @alexxmalloy Aug 16 ... when scary movie 6 has anna faris recreate this scene 0:01 From arch movies 158 8.8K 116K del 2M
@ijanedoll Aug 16 ... they did so well traumatizing us about teen pregnancy i'm still traumatized as an adult 107 13K 86K 1.6M
evan loves worf G @esjesjesj Aug 16 ... You built a what now MrBeast @MrBeast Aug 16 Built a prison and offered an ex cop and a convicted felon $500,000 if they spent 100 days locked inside. Was cool to see them learn about each other's perspective on things, go watch! CELL BLOCK - B CHRISTIANS 05201 267 5K 128K del 4.9M
nat s ... @thiscitysabxre Aug 24 why do they look like eric and ariel had a lavender marriage emma @babylovessivan Aug 23 What is in the air 154 21K 299K 4.8M
2x 4 @daveloach2.9h ... r/Teachers 9h ... Taylor calling herself and Travis teachers is stolen valor. 248 80 80 2K 42K 1M

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