15 Wild Stories About People’s Craziest Cousin

‘A cousin of mine hijacked a helicopter and tried to bomb a police station’
15 Wild Stories About People’s Craziest Cousin

Crazy cousins are a blessing — they always etch a new bit of lore into the family history, and their strange behavior can usually distract you from any personal disasters you’re dealing with. 

One Redditor’s weird cousin, for instance, liked to shoot the shit — literally. During a camping trip, the cousin walked off into the woods with a joint and his gun to do his morning business. After he was done getting high and fertilizing the forest, he looked back at the pile of his shit before searching for his gun. Then, for some reason, he decided to shoot his stack of turds. Moments later, he returned to the campsite covered with the poopy consequences of his very stupid decision, cementing his status as that family’s crazy cousin. 

Other Redditors have shared how their weirdest cousins earned their titles, with stories involving piss-filled Super Soakers, stolen oxygen tanks and a helicopter hijacking.

Fair-Potato-1392 1y ago My cousin (M14 at that time) was a big troublemaker. Не did crazy shit like hang from a bridge or just provoke everyone he could. But the thing I remember most is that he peed in his brand new Super Soaker and shot at random people. Until he chose the wrong guy to mess with. Не unkowingly shot at like a member of the local Mafia and yeah he got beat up very very bad. Не had to go to the hospital. Share 3 ...
BurrSugar 1y ago My cousin is a really obnoxious person, and also has a very obnoxious sense of humor. We're also not a very private family, a lot of which is owed to the fact that we spent most of our time at Grandma's, in a one-bedroom house with one bathroom, despite that there were 6 grandkids. I was in the bathroom with my cousin once, chatting while I waited for her to finish so I could use it. She was in her period and changed her tampon. She liked to make silly faces at me, and so, without thinking,
1y ago My wife has a cousin who keeps trying to get famous. His first schtick was driving an unlicensed taxi around a Austin trying to get a Taxicabs Confession type thing going. Now he's writing romance novels about age gap (super young but adult male, super old female) romance. Fuckin creepy shit. I don't talk to the dude. 3 Share ...
CRCMIDS 1y ago So my cousin is into exotic pets and back in the 90's, he owned a monkey. The monkey escaped the cage and my great grandmother and my great aunt barricaded themselves in the bathroom with a broom as their weapon. They were stuck there for hours with no phone until the cousin came home. He's owned multiple pets and most recently his alligator died when his maid bleached the bathtub it sleeps in. He's also a huge drug addict and roidhead with many other stories, but l'll leave you guys with this funny one. 4 Share ...
1y ago Apparently there's copper in houses. Rusty started stealing it from houses. Well he got a divorce and lost his whole family after he went to prison. I still don't understand the scam. Не was know in our town as The Copper Bandit before he got caught. Rusty, just work at Walmart. Don't steal copper. It was weird. - 213 Share ...
IlluminatedPickle 1y ago My cousin and her boyfriend were really fond of house raids and break ins. They stole so much shit that it ended up being national news, and the police set up all the stuff they'd stolen outside the house for news cameras. It was a ridiculous amount, but the thing that got me the most was when the cameraman was walking through everything I spotted what was clearly an oxygen tank and mask. They'd fucking stolen an emphysema patients oxygen. She then decided to get pregnant during the trial, because that'll keep her out of prison, right?
FrankTheTank2205 1y ago A cousin of mine hijacked a helicopter and tried to bomb a local police station. It failed when the home made bomb failed to explode. To this day, it's officially the only occasion since ww2 great Britain was attacked from the air 26 Share ...
Dubious_Titan 1y ago A cousin I never met got high and went on a high-speed chase with the cops. They ended up in a field somewhere and he got out of the car and fought like 4 cops. He's in prison now. Again, I never met this dude. Son of my uncle's family in California. 5 Share ...
neverhadgoodhair 1y ago | have a cousin who graduated from MIT, brilliant. We fed him pork ribs once, and he asked his mom what part of the chicken they came from. 7 Share ...
PupEDog 1y ago My 29M cousin is currently doing a sort of walkabout of America. His plan is to walk across the country without any money, relying on the generosity of strangers and churches (he's a super duper Catholic). Не started in New Jersey about 4 months ago and he's currently in Georgia. Most of us thought he'd be hurt or worse by now, but apparently he's been doing really well by relying on churches. One of his goals was to prove that humanity is inherently kind, which no one really agreed, and so far he's proved his point. I
Wowwkatie 1y ago My cousin was a pretty big partier in college, so we all assumed he'd done more than just drink alcohol. When he was in his mid 20s, he lived in California and called his parents who lived in Florida (3 hour time difference) at like midnight Florida time yelling I'm dying and then hung up the phone and didn't answer when they called back. Не finally called them back and kept telling them that he was dying. His girlfriend took the phone and explained that he'd eaten an edible and was totally fine, just way too high
SchrodingersNutsack 1y ago We were camping once, and my cousin walked off into the woods to smoke a joint and take a morning poop. Не took a gun along to keep himself entertained. When he finished his joint and poo, he looked back at his pile and naturally decided to shoot it. Не returned to the campsite covered in the shrapnel of his bad decision. - 9.8K Share ...
FriesWizard 1y ago Doing a hike with two of my cousins and an uncle of ours. One of my cousins found a ball shaped cactus, and wanted to take it with him for no reason (he just thought it was cool). Не didn't have any container so he had to carry it in his hand, causing the cactus to sting his fingers continually. After a while, my uncle told him to throw it away, because he was getting harmed. My cousin did it, but in the most stupid way: Не threw the cactus in the air and kicked it (like
Letspostsomething 1y ago I have a cousin who is a nurse. She rose to a small bit of TikTok fame by posting videos talking about how she would have no problem unplugging someone's ventilator at the hospital to plug in her phone. There were a few of these videos and each one made you wonder what was wrong with her. She was promptly fired from her job. 546 Share ...
spcarlin 1y ago My cousin robbed a taxi driver at knife point, when the taxi had arrived at the destination... which was my cousins house. Yes he went to jail 2 Share ...

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