57 Hilarious Tweets About Money That Won’t Cost You A Single Penny

Stepping out of your house? $15. Laughing at these tweets? Priceless
57 Hilarious Tweets About Money That Won’t Cost You A Single Penny

Between inflation and navigating the impossible task of stepping outside of the house without dropping $15 on a Little Treat™, saving money is harder than ever. Fortunately, there’s still one cheap thrill we can afford in this economy — laughing at the state of our nearly-zeroed-out bank accounts. 

Whether it’s the secret to living a long life or the dangers of buying personal finance books for your child, here are the funniest money-related tweets that are free to enjoy…

Stacey Follow ... @skittle624 It's ok, stock market. I'm steadily declining every day too. 6:35 AM Feb 23, 2023 10.2K Views
Olaf Falafel Follow ... @OFalafel Don't fall for the 'Deep-fry your money in batter' investment scam - that's how I frittered away all my savings. 2:23 PM . J Jun 3, 2024 55.3K Views 15 137 1.2K 22
Kip Conlon Follow ... @kipconlon Girlfriend's dad doesn't like me for some reason. Doesn't want to get rich via foolproof investment opportunity, either. Strange guy. 4:44 PM Dec 10, 2023 3,242 Views 4 25 82 3
Christina, mother of spiders Follow ... @Aikiwomannc DeBeers ad: *Close up of eyes tearing up then a block of parmesan reggiano - man gets down on one knee* This year, let them know it's forever with an investment of 3 months salary in cheese. 3:12 PM Nov 13, 2023 2,999 Views
Dad Jokes! Follow ... @dadgivesjokes My wife was livid when I told her I used all of our savings to buy stock in Bose. I told her to relax, it's a sound investment. 5:29 PM Jul 31, 2023 . 3,053 Views
mom mom mom mom mom Follow ... @notmythirdrodeo I've diversified my investment portfolio by purchasing multiple properties* *Barbie Dream House, Peppa Pig House, Gabby's Dollhouse, Polly Pocket house 9:28 AM Jan 27, 2023 5,493 Views
Shade 5 @Shader70 Took a good look at my finances. I won't make that mistake again. 9:55 PM Mar 27, 2024 3,444 Views
the hype Follow ... @TheHyyyype me : open up this instant! this is my house! son: well actually you have a mortgage, so it's the bank's house. have someone from wells fargo come and tell me me : i knew we shouldn't have gotten him those personal finance books 7:38 PM Aug 30, 2023 5,844 Views
Marie Connor @thistallawkgirl I just bought one share of stock. I'm a finance bro now. 12:55 PM Mar 15, 2023 . 3,156 Views
ozyemandias Follow ... @emanbelanger me: *falls down stairs* kind stranger: oh, you poor thing! me: *tears in my eyes* why did you have to bring my finances into this 2:11 PM . May 18, 2022
Uncle Duke Follow ... @UncleDuke1969 i would drive twenty miles away to save eight cents a gallon on gas which is why my wife is in charge of our household finances 12:28 PM Jul 4, 2022 7 86 468 5
Brandon Dail Follow ... @aweary : here's why i think buying lottery tickets is the future of finance 8:51 AM Feb 7, 2022 20 1.9K 24K 190
F. Scott Fitz Spooky (Johnny Utah Edition) @FScottFitzJesse I may be 37, but I feel 25...when I look at my finances: 8:32 PM Jan 29, 2021 1 18 58 1
Jane Dashley Follow ... @JaneDashley Remember that financial writer who started her article by saying Anyone can fall for a scam! then admitted she thought Amazon was giving her a secret mission from the FBI and had to put her life savings in a shoe box and give it to a stranger immediately or she'd go to prison 6:06 PM Oct 3, 2024 1.7M Views
sweatpants cher Follow ... @House_Feminist Millennials complain a lot about how we can't afford homes or retirement savings like our parents, but we have a lot of things they didn't...like GPS, food allergies, adult acne, side hustles, and fluency in mental health terminology. 2:08 PM Jan 28, 2024 4,705 Views
Mindy Furano Follow ... @MindyFurano someone having a baby in the '90s: I'm pregnant, you'll see it in 9 months. someone having a baby since social media: rylington harverson punce, a future mountain mover, and barrier breaker, was born last night & the ground shook around us. 200k in his savings account already 6:37 PM Sep 23, 2023 3,136 Views
vonTraphaus Follow ... @vonTraphaus My bank, who passed all 14 interest rate rises onto my home loan account, but only half of them onto my savings account, just sent me some tips on how to identify financial scammers 10:30 PM Aug 10, 2023 5,269 Views
Shkeeber Follow ... @shkeeber My savings account has been empty for so long that a Spirit Halloween just opened up inside it 6:57 PM Aug 6, 2023 1,728 Views
Happy Halloweener Weener Weener Follow ... @neenertothe3 A financial advisor from my bank called to various savings options as if she doesn't have access to my account information. 2:22 PM Apr 14, 2023 4,169 Views
Jess Dweck Follow ... @TheDweck In no functioning society should the sentence Someone stole my ape cartoon be followed by now my life savings are gone 4:26 PM Jan 2, 2022
Funny Memes @memeadikt Limited budget When you need a holiday but your budget is quite limited LITER are - with - - 11:28 AM Aug 23,2024 11.6K Views
Robert Knop ... @FatherWithTwins Me: We are underbudget this month! Dog: *eats kid's retainers* 2:50 PM Aug 1, 2024 4,943 Views 5 34 104
Syrup Tishus ... @Syrup_Tishus Me: This escape room sucks My boss: This is a budget meeting... 7:17 AM Sep 21, 2024 184.9K Views 45 842 7.8K 168
THIS HOUR HAS 22Minutes 22 MINUTES @22_Minutes The 2024 federal budget promises billions of dollars in new spending. Aw, that's so sweet, they're gonna do a single grocery run for us! 1:08 PM Apr 16, 2024 4,842 Views 2 6 43
Real Life Mommy ... @reallifemommy3 Me: if we stay on budget for the next few months we'll be back on track My bathroom pipes: good plan, right after you fix this leak 8:23 AM Apr 9, 2024 16.2K Views 5 67 616 2
inspector ratchet ... @_hood_mona_lisa One normal thing I like to do on my my lunch breaks is go on Zillow with my 20 million dollar budget and my fucking delusions 1:56 PM Mar 27, 2024 38.7K Views 9 102 1.4K 18
I Hide From My Kids ... @IHideFromMyKids I'm just a Whole Foods girl on a Walmart budget. 8:30 PM Jun 11, 2023 12.8K Views 7 73 202
jerm ... @mysightsarelow I was fired from the zoo for exploding the budget, but I still think the giraffes look pretty great in those turtleneck sweaters. 11:52 AM.Jul 12, 2022
J. L. Westover ... @MrLovenstein money maker SHAKE YO' MONEY MAKER! WRONG! SHAKE SHAKE ART DEGREE plingle 11:49 AM Oct 16, 2024 a 210.3K Views
Ken Klippenstein ... @kenklippenstein Hedge fund CEO: I lost $3 billion, my company, my home, and now my wife Me: Have you considered budgeting? 9:18 PM Jan 27, 2021 4.2K 60K 466K 1.6K
Fesshole... FESS ... HOLE @fesshole Just shared my screen in a business meeting, and realised that my desktop was showing a google search for where did Scrooge McDuck get his money? 8:25 AM Sep 29, 2024 469.3K Views 122 242 8.1K 101
Hollie Harris ... @allholls I've recently come into some money. *winks and hands over the few dollars I made at my garage sale to the bank teller to deposit into my account* 10:00 AM Sep 28, 2024 4,966 Views 12 26 113 2
meghan ... @deloisivete Save money by sending the same unopened applesauce cup in your kid's lunch all week, follow me for more financial tips 10:57 AM Sep 27, 2024 11.2K Views 3 46 527 3
@itssherifield ... @itssherifield I tell my kids winning isn't everything and then I steal money from the monopoly bank. 10:14 AM Sep 26, 2024 8,242 Views 3 34 178 3
Mo Mohler ... @MoMohler If our tax money went towards funding healthy fried chicken research, I think we'd all be a little more understanding. 5:50 PM Sep 17, 2024 2,625 Views 2 10 69
D.N. Schmidt, space opera author ... @Writepop My wife bought me a hollowed out dictionary to use as a piggy bank. I never use it. I love spending money so much, I can't put it into words. 10:21 AM . Sep 9, 2024 599 Views 1 6 27
Stansaid Airport ... @StansaidAirport Fact: If you bind together the receipts of things you buy in an airport, it makes a tiny book that tells the tragic story of how you have no money anymore. 5:00 PM Sep 24, 2024 7,258 Views 17 24 276 2
Real Life Mommy ... @reallifemommy3 My kid has been collecting money she finds around the house for years, I was short some cash and she let me borrow some, as long as I repay her, so now I owe her money for borrowing my money. Is it too soon to enroll her in business school? 8:26 AM Sep 5, 2024 9,284 Views 22 54 356
Rodney Lacroix Follow ... @RodLacroix Bad news: With the stock market in a nosedive, I've had to increase my retirement age. Good news: I'm going to live to 157. 12:11 PM Mar 15, 2023 3,959 Views 22 100 4 1
Michael Girdley @girdley 21h ... I asked my lawyer once why he liked me as a client. Не said, Because you pay your bills. Me: But I pay late sometimes! Не said, Dude, 40% of my bills never get paid. Me: Whoa. Lesson: Don't pay your lawyers. 67 115 5,768 230K
BiG Mek @meka_badazz88· 1d ... Aite boom so RENT DUE next week... Party at my house this weekend!!! Free to get in... $150 to GET OUT!!!! 226 6,189 54.4K 1.2M
ethical hater @DijahSB.1d my greatest tweet 4:52 Tweet moneybagg dij @DijahSB I only call my haters broke, everybody else is just a victim of capitalism 5:21 PM 2022-02-25 del View Tweet activity 84 27.1K 213K 3M
Shawn @ShawnZGatlin - 1d This used to be a Bank of America ATM. UP IN SMOKE PAPE SMOKE SMOKESHOP N8495 SHOP OPEN - ST H 1112 CASH EXPIRE ... 54 185 1,383 76.6K
nuura too shy @qabta123.7 7/18/24 ... After finding out the average annual salary for the UK is only 30k, I stopped judging them for stabbing each other 255 4,844 66K 3.7M
KH @kevtahjae 21h I'm tired of buying groceries omggggg I just wanna steal!!!! 29 1,460 5,440 200K
Mr. Cabernet @mardagod 1d The recession is getting loud Ace-tyra @Flor... 5d Realizing that the body doesn't need food every day is next-level. 64 3,579 16.5K 660K
DatNoFact 7 (@datnofact.bs... 21h ... KEEP STOP hello I'm new to the stock market is it good when the intel ceo starts praying Pat Gelsinger intel @PGels... 1d Let your eyes look straight ahead; fix your gaze directly before you. Give careful thought to the paths for your feet and be steadfast in all your ways Proverbs 4:25-26 217 11K 103K 5.9M
Simon Holland Follow ... @simoncholland Tried to save some money by getting Halloween candy at Aldi. I hope kids like Twicks, Skattles, and 4 Musketeers. 7:40 AM . Oct 29, 2024 . 27.1K Views
Matty Follow @bestestname Political ads be like: send us money so we can send you more ads 9:25 AM . Oct 27, 2024 . 8,072 Views
Jesse Case Follow ... @jessecase Was invited to give a talk about comedy writing to some 8th graders today and at the end the teacher asked what my main advice for kids was and I said invest in fresh water stocks as soon as possible. Wasn't the vibe, they wrapped me up pretty quick. 11:12 PM May 13, 2024 5,958 Views
Doc Follow @DocAtCDI Ive started investing in stocks... Mainly beef, chicken and vegetables. One day I hope to be a bouillonaire. 9:30 PM . Sep 7, , 2023, 6,169 Views
Zoah Headless-Spooks Follow ... @Zoah_HS THIS IS NOT A FINANCE ACCOUNT. I DO NOT HAVE ANY TRADING ADVICE. HEDGES-STOCKS IS MY SURNAME. 3:45 AM Jan 29, 2021
Hollie Harris Follow ... @allholls My husband: When have I ever steered us wrong? *Flashback to 2014* My husband: Trust me, investing a huge chunk of our life savings in RadioShack is going to make us millionaires. 8:49 AM Mar 7, 2024 1,567 Views
Wilde Thingy Follow ... @wildethingy If dolphins are so smart how come I managed to trick one into investing all its savings in my phoney pyramid scheme? 8:43 AM Jan 17, 2022 9 31 82
maddie, hot dog enthusiast Follow ... @damnitmadeline Bf dropped his head for a full 30 seconds of silence bc he was explaining the stock market crash to me and I sagely supplied it's because mercury went into retrograde yesterday 4:46 PM Aug 5, 2024 3M Views 192 8.8K 135K 3.3K
Buddawiggi COOL @MarkBuckawicki How the stock market works: Seller: selling $20 for $25! Buyer:  take my money! 5:44 PM May 5, 2023 547 Views
Burning Mom Follow ... @MomOnFire If you think someone has put a hex on you, Venmo me $800 and I'll get rid of it. 8:59 PM Oct 30, 2024 . 1,646 Views

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