23 of the Funniest Tweets from December 22, 2023

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23 of the Funniest Tweets from December 22, 2023

It’s a dark day for Nintendo fans, furries and Jack Black. The Academy released its shortlists for 10 Oscar categories and “Peaches” from The Super Mario Bros. Movie was sadly not ripe for the picking. Black’s comedic power ballad from the 2023 blockbuster was passed up in favor of a triad of songs from Barbie, a surprise crash landing from Asteroid City and yet another Diane Warren ditty. While Black’s Oscar dreams were dashed this year, there’s hope for the future. The actor has stumped for a potential sequel that goes “full musical” a la Joker: Folie à Deux is. Here’s hoping that Black does indeed get Bowser’s Revenge

The Academy wasn’t the only entity in Hollywood making big decisions around its annual awards ceremony. After a number of high-profile names turned down the gig, the new owners of Dick Clark Productions have finally found their Golden Globes host: Jo Koy. The Filipino-American comic mostly known for his tenure on Chelsea Lately is hoping for a career-defining turn as he attempts to polish the turd that is the Hollywood Foreign Press Association. Koy follows in the footsteps of fellow comedian Jerrod Carmichael, who hosted last year’s show. In an Instagram post, Koy promised that “this one is going to be extra special,” which is a low bar to clear for a show that’s been embroiled in controversy for years now.

As we wait to see if Koy’s Golden Globes monologue will be funny, there’s one place we can turn to right now that we know is hilarious: Twitter. Today’s funniest tweets include those about one user’s awe-inspiring discovery during Twitter’s brief outage, the socks that are a woman’s best friend and Daphne and Fred if they had an estimated net worth of over $500 million.

April Ajoy @aprilajoyr 2d ... My 6 year old wanted to tell me something but was adamant she couldn't say it in our house. So we get in the car and she says: Mommy, I don't think Santa is real but I didn't want to say it in front of Cheeks because it would upset him. Cheeks is our Elf on the Shelf. 32 866 36.6K 600K

Chris Coro @iamchriscoro . 1d Them : do alcoholics run in your family Me:no they drive 74 9,072 94.1K 5.4M

uncle gworl @_uncle_gworl. dd when you high and you been hearing something for awhile and you look over and it was your Bestfriend talking to you VOI 9 295 6,549 del 279K

numero uno @OkButStill.22h you're leaving our company for more money? what are you insane? we gave you a computer 21 777 16.3K 512K

aig @oceanfearer. dd ... In my experience the customer is hardly ever right. The customer is also usually a rat bitch 31 6,770 49.2K du 1.2M

b @communemami - 2 22h Can't stop thinking about this... his mind is so beautiful What's anemic anyway Oh that's like adhd for blood 2:56 AM 7 39 374 20K

James Urbaniak @JamesUrbaniak. 1 11h ... Sydney Sweeney and Glen Powell and the return of 1940s actor names 28 573 12K 355K

Peter Twinklage @PeterTwinklage 21h I now recognize that this is a Dunkin' Donuts joke but at first glance I thought they were implying all lesbians live in Massachusetts, which is true Thorongil @Thorongil16 . 1d my suggestion for what Massachusetts's new flag should be 55 41K 3.3K 1.1M

oscar @onthewayjay.2 23h life was so much funnier when we didn't record everything and you had to try and convince your buddy that you aren't lying about seeing a dude eat an entire lobster on the subway Mail @MailOnline 1d Online Daily Mail Online Disgusting moment NYC commuter eats an entire LOBSTER on the subway by himself as he cracks open the crustacean with his bare hands trib.al/AJFGLe7 5 3.1K 80K 101

t****y @areyoufuckingfr. 14h if this guy tried talking to me id kill myself instantly 15 943 15K 290K

The Jay Agenda @JayJurden 1h HE'S 6'5! don't go to war for him! Send his big ass over there!!! @elordei 18h This is a face you go to war for 5 274 2.6K 68K

cashewrising @cashewrising 23h slay bells ring...... are YOU listening?? I MOM WOW I 19 5.2K 51K 1.2M

CARTIER. @CartiersSaint . 23h ... Gypsy Rose when she doesn't realize we are calling her mother as a compliment and not to torment her 33 1K 15K 509K

dri a) @isseymidaddy. 1d ... Someone said they look like Daphne and Fred and now i can't unsee it. 39 2,925 45.8K 672K

Laura Bassett @LEBassett. 1d This tweet really took a turn Rod Blagojevich @realBl... 3d Priscilla Presley with my daughter Annie and me. She has endured the loss of a child with grace and courage. She has a new movie out called Priscilla based on her book. I'm writing a book based on my experience with KGB style weaponized prosecutions and imprisonment. 34 213 4,750 636K

olive @brazilnut765 - 1 1d when i was 15 i i would steal $400 bridal lingerie sets from nordstrom to wear for my high school boyfriend named kyle 93 1,415 53.3K del 1.8M

R mor @moristiko.2d ... I had sex for 3 hours last night.. We role-played as a doctor & patient.. I was in the waiting room for 2 hours an 57 minutes 13 1,243 20.5K 889K

OG Spoogie @Jeezy318_.2d ... I need help juju $ @ayeejuju 2d the nintendo ds was ahead of its time NINTENDODS 586 2,577 11.2K 1.4M

Cof fee Lovers and Fans 22h ... Not wearing these today as they're in the wash, please be careful out there ladies conscious S step® S op e socks t that stop n violence AIR TRADE any SUSTAINABLE against women SUSTAINABLE FAIR TRADE TRADE -FAIR SUSTAINABLE 40 3,524 75.3K a 1.4M

kira @kirawontmiss. 1d Just spoke to my wife while twitter was down. She seems nice. She's a nurse apparently 667 7,612 137K 11.4M

lesbian, esq. @lesbianlawfirm.2 21h ... The Replies X @lpc9929 . 17h ago (edited) I am infertile from eating scented candles. The 1.5K 50 4,321 62.3K 1M

Wick @Waitingonwick-1 1d The pathological liar homie, is a quintessential part of every friend group. 53 1,431 8,496 del 568K

little zachary @TRIXABBY. 1d ... the muppet movie is clearly more important 17 1,520 11.7K 389K
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