32 Hilarious Socially Awkward Things People Have Said or Done

32 Hilarious Socially Awkward Things People Have Said or Done

When people with social anxiety are forced to mingle, critical-thinking skills can go out the window in favor of literally whatever first comes to mind — and it’s usually awkward as hell. Take for example, the guy who wanted to leave a party so badly that he climbed a tree and stayed there until the coast was clear. Or the girl who, for reasons unknown, did finger guns and said “Zoop!” to her boss as she was leaving work. 

And as much as the feeling of anxiety may suck in the moment, Redditors admit that these situations are pretty hysterical in hindsight. Here are more of the funniest things they did as a result of their introversion

Im_Justintyler 6y This one time I was approached by a highschool girl trying to get my contact info, I'm only 22 so I mean I guess I'm passable for just an older guy, but clearly you gotta say no, so me, being a Reddit user, said something stupid, I started to say Sorry but I'm old enough to be your dad but that was so dumb I changed it mid sentence to sorry I'm old enough to be your brother but that didn't make any sense so what really came out of my mouth was sorry I'm old enough to

KS Sinnocent 6y When I was about 11, I stood in a room with my mom and her employees after an office Thanksgiving luncheon. They were chatting away about various things and we were all snacking. I took a bite of turkey and as I went to swallow it, it lodged in my throat. I kept swallowing as hard as I could but it wouldn't budge and I couldn't breathe. I didn't have a drink near me, either. So, I stood there attempting to get it down while giving NO INDICATION that I was literally choking on my food... Because

actuallylavagirl . 6y Talking to my boss after a long day of exams and assignments. I go to leave and she catches the door before I can leave to say goodbye. For some reason my wired brain made me give her fingerguns and say zoop as I walked away. Thought about it the whole way home. ... 51.7k

Pm_your_serious_face . . 6y Tried to remind myself what date it is, while at the bar counter. Got my beer. She said Thank you I said Sixteenth.

BetterthanAdam . 6y My parents always bring up the time when I was 4 and we were at this Mexican restaurant. Apparently they started singing Happy Birthday to me, to which I smiled, but then got nervous and promptly, confidently, leaned over and bit my dad on the arm.

rakhira . 6y Driving to a party, sat outside of it in my car the entire time, left. Next day, said I was there. ... 10.8k

arcsine . 6y Mixed up thank you very much and thank you ma'am, and said thank you mom to a bank teller. ... 21k

cheezzy4ever . 6y I was buying a Zelda-themed wallet at an FYE once. The cashier asked me if I wanted a bag for it. I just stammered and said No thanks, I'll just equip it now. No thanks, I'll just equip it now ... 1.8k

 . 6y I once got off the wrong bus stop on purpose because I didn't want to tell the bus to stop, so I just waited for it to stop itself ... 3.5k

 . 6y If someone ever comes to my door when I'm home alone, l'll army crawl around my house, avoiding all the windows until I get to the stairway and I can listen until they leave. I still do this as a 20 year old woman. ... 2.3k

 . 6y One time when I was a kid, I was calling up a girl I liked to ask her if she wanted to hang out. Her mom answered the phone and in my awkward teenage bumbling I asked her mom if SHE wanted to hang out. I'm still not quite over that one, nearly 10 years later ... 3.4k

faatiydut . 6y I had to pick something up from someone's house and was desperate for the loo, didn't want to ask to use the bathroom in their house so instead picked what I needed up, rudely rushed through small talk, basically ran to my car, drove far enough away they couldn't see me and then parked again and half pissed myself running into a bush. Wasn't even the first time I'd been to that house... ... 4.3k

RippedPika . 6y I'm a retail cashier. A woman was buying a dress and humorously stated that she might be too fat for it. Me, never one to disagree with a customer, smiled and said, Yup! I burned a few calories hitting my head on the counter after that exchange.

Chumbolex 6y After work, I decide to get a beer at a bar. I teach night classes on a side of town I'm not used to, so I go into random sports bar and I sit alone. I do not watch most sports. Later... Me (in my mind): it's getting late. I should go home. Random guy: hey, this Texans game is good! Can't believe (something footbally happened) Me (pretending to know football stuff): yeah, these dudes are dope! The Texans are in for some trouble if they mess up! Guy: FINALLY! Someone on my side!! The guy buys me

itsnotnormal21 . 1 6y My girlfriend was a server at a restaurant called Bonefish and she was supposed to ask Have you ever dined at Bonefish? but instead she asked Have you ever boned at Dinefish? She was mortified but her customers thought it was hilarious. ... 4.7k

 . 6y Asked a customer if her name was Kate spelled with a Kate ... 14k

noblazinjusthazin 6y Was at a picnic with some friends 10-15 people, turned into like 50-75 people within a hour. Enter extreme anxiety. Went up to grill to get hot dog. Cute girl walks behind me to get one, notice and start sweating. Barbecue homie hands me my hot dog, so nervous I drop it right onto the cement. Didn't know to get another one so picked it up with dirt all over it, took a bite, and walked away. Added bonus: a bush I'm really allergic too was near by so the next week I had an allergic reaction all

 6y Walked past my classroom but didn't wanna look stupid doing a freshman 180 so I circled alllllll the way around the building, missed it again, and walked to some random restroom nearby and sat in the restroom for like 5 minutes because I didn't want people to recognize me as the dude who keeps doing laps around the fuckin Chem lab building ... 20.9k

Scoutregister 6y TL;DR I faked an angry phone call because I was too afraid to just get out of line I was picking up my little sister from school, and I didn't have anything better to do and I didn't want her to have to wait on the long Carline, so I got there 40 minutes early. About five minutes before school let out, she told me she was going home with a friend. I was so scared that the people behind me in line would think I was creepy if I jus left the line after all that time,

Llebanna 0 6y I went into a store I used to work at expecting to see my coworkers so I could greet them. A lady was there, but I had no idea what who she was. She asked me if she could help, and I stuttered a no. Then I stood and kind of tapped my feet around like I was a fuckin tap dancer and I tried apologizing but instead said I uh....I'm not looking for you. She looked so confused and I could feel my face getting red. I literally ran out. Not just walked quickly- ran and

Captain_Frying_Pan . . 6y Climbed a tree to get away from people at an outdoor party. Stayed there until everyone left and then went home. ... 1.4k

AstronautGuava . . 6y Back in middle school I literally ran away when someone was going to ask me to the school dance. In my defense, I really had to pee. I still feel bad about it though. ... 5.5k

Cuppycakemarie • . 6y I have gotten out of my car, walked up to the house of the party, then walked back to my car...then walked back up to the house, then back to my car until I finally texted my friend at the party, asking him to come get me outside so I wouldn't have to walk in front of the crowd alone. ... 13.4k

 . 6y I'm from Ireland (a Catholic enough country). I deliver pizzas and one night a women said god be with you as I was walking away and I stumbled over my words and said peace be upon you like the fecking pizza Pope. Cringed pretty hard walking away as she just looked at me. Edit: toppings be upon you my children. ... 15.4k

killjoytrash . 6y I once hid from my family when they came over for the holidays out of fear of interaction. I hid especially from one of my cousins who was socially aggressive and just made me really anxious. I had nowhere else to hide where there wasn't people, so I went into my bathroom and hid under the sink (I was about 8) and just planned to stay there as long as possible. My cousin (the aggressive one) came in, took a long and winded shit and then left. I just stayed there and am to this day even

Island-radio 6y I was in a dance class a few years ago and we had to do improv. Everyone there was a WAY better dancer than me,so I had a difficult time just with that. Well,my teacher gave us 5 mins to come up with a dance to a whole song,and you'd have to dance in front of the class alone. I noped the fuck out of there and ran and hid in the bathroom. My cell phone was still in the classroom, but at that point I didn't care. I decided to sneak out the front door of the

Stop_Sign . 6y My roommates and I hosted a party. I wasn't having a good night, and went into my room to find two people I didn't know making out on my bed. I said, Please leave when you're done and went in my friend's room instead to curl up and freak out. ... 2.5k

beezynameddeltreezy .  6y I farted right in front of my boss and I started snapping my fingers in attempt to make it look like it was not a loud ass fart

StreetwearMarkie . 6y Bartender asked me what my name was....I forgot and had to think about it. ... 15.2k

un suarezj9 . . 6y I was at a chipotle. The girl asked me how my day had been. I said large please because I got confused and thought she was asking what size I wanted. Then she asked if I wanted white rice or the other rice they had and I said yes! ... 18.8k

trialobite 6y The other day at my small office I went to the bathroom to fix my shirt which I had worn inside out. When I went into the stall the bathroom was empty. As I flipped my shirt around someone walked into the stall next to me. I also used some toilet paper to wipe my nose (slight cold) and dropped the paper in the bowl. This triggered the auto flush sensor and it flushed. My predicament began when I realized I also had to pee, but since I had already used TP and flushed my twisted mind decided

Wanni25 . 6y Called my dad to pick me up from high school instead of pooping at school. ... 5.4k
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