30 of the Craziest Things That Happened at Holiday Office Parties

One guy somehow got his motorcycle into the second-floor office
30 of the Craziest Things That Happened at Holiday Office Parties

While it’s not advisable to get absolutely twisted with your co-workers, sometimes you just need to let loose. After all, what happens at the holiday work party… stays at the holiday work party? Or the holiday work party is the reason you wake up in your cubicle the following day with your motorcycle parked next to you. Or the holiday work party is the reason “Go on, have a lick!” becomes a banned phrase at the office. You get the idea. 

Regardless, these Redditors attended bacchanalian holiday office bashes that put the ancient Romans to shame. Cheers to the people who partied so hard that they never showed up to work again. 

natvonbrat 4y We had our Holiday party on a barge whose top floor was rented out to a different company. There was only one male and female toilet per floor and one of the female party goers from that party had had way to much to drink before the meal was even served. Between dinner and dessert she stumbled down the flight of stairs pee running down her leg and falls into the men's toilet. Does her thing and falls up the stairs back up to her party. Next thing you know we hear her screaming fine then, l'll just
CarsenAF 4y We had a white elephant gift exchange. Pretty much every gift was a bottle of alcohol or a gift card. One person selected their gift and opened it and it was just a 4 pack of toilet paper. Не tried to laugh but was obviously annoyed. Acted like a brat every gift opening after. Someone gets a gift card, a sarcastic Ohhh, wanna trade?, or Lucky you... . The last gift is opened and he just goes on a rant about how unfair it is everyone got a decent gift and he's stuck with toilet paper. Demanded to
StatueofLibertyPlay 6y My first Christmas party occurred a few weeks after I got hired. I blacked out a bit and wasn't let back into a bar after I went out for a smoke so made my way home. The next day, I got woken up by a call from my boss's boss at 11 am. I had a groggy, Oh, shit, am I already getting fired moment of anxiety, but answered the call. Не just asked if I made it home okay. Yup. Spent the rest of the weekend dreading going back into the office on Monday morning. On Monday
Kleemin 5y Honest Asshole Big box retail job in college the managers wife got drunk and the HR lady who was a real sweetheart tried to bring her home early since the store manager couldn't leave the party. HR lady gets the drunk 45 yr old woman in the back seat the lady simultaneously pukes and shits her dress. More sad than funny really. So every one starts going around and telling the story to each other and eventually pretty much every one knows except the store manager. Не get's in front of us to make some Christmas speech/toast and
HorseMeatSandwich 4y It was hosted at a really nice restaurant and there was an open bar. We all arrived, had a drink, started chatting and joking around. Then the CEO arrived and promptly called us all to attention. We assumed he would just be congratulating us on a great year and wishing us a happy holidays, but instead he announced that we would not be receiving bonuses that year and that there would be layoffs in the near future. People were PISSED. There was basically a mad dash to the open bar and we all said No bonuses? Fuck it,
jayheadspace 4y I worked in a bank branch a long time ago, it had about a dozen employees in total and we went out to dinner for Christmas one night. The branch manager said that she was getting people cabs in case they wanted to drink. That was some sort of cue for everyone to get hammered. The quietest, meekest person that worked there got very sloppy drunk. It turned out she had been dealing with a lot of stuff at home, and so she really let loose. Started telling everyone exactly what she thought of them which was never
HumbleTrees 1y A guy thought playing cock or ball was appropriate. This was at a leading global tech firm and a Xmas do for one of the sector teams. About 100 people at the event. For those wondering, cock or ball entails turning around, unzipping enough to reveal a small patch of skin, and then asking people to guess if it's your cock or your balls. Horrified as I was, people around me acted like this was any other work event. It ended with one of the vendor reps saying she can only guess by taste. Yes. She licked it.
G33ONER 1y Watched a work colleague down two glasses of long Island ice tea, he calmly sat back then spewed the lot and everything else all over the floor and managed to cover a large area, everyone but him moved away. Не then took off his tshirt slapped it down on the floor in an attempt to mop it up moved the tshirt around with his foot and then out of nowhere put the tshirt back on and lit a cigarette. The whole place was watching and in unison went AAAAARGH.. ... Reply 13
herbsBJJ 327d We had an older PA (like 50ish) who had been part of the business since the creation of the earth who liked to make out like she was mega senior and ran the joint. Fella on a temp contract joined a few month before the christmas doo and fingered her in the taxi home because he thought he was getting in the 'good books' with one of the bosses and it would get him a permo contract. Hey... 5 years on hes still here, so maybe it worked ... Reply 106
bunchoffuckinJamals 8y My company's Christmas party was last Friday night. After drinking a jar of moonshine at the party I woke up with the worst headache ever with no recollection of how I got home. I was starving and needed something to soak up whatever alcohol was left I'm my stomach so the roommate and I decided to go get some breakfast. Upon climbing into my truck I made a rather mysterious discovery in my backseat...a giant turkey pan full of homemade banana pudding..wtf. apparently I wasn't thrilled about my Christmas bonus and let my ceo know all about it
MisterShine 4y My employer decided that, on that particular Christmas and for the first time, staff could bring along their wives/ husbands/SOs. One of my close colleagues, slightly over-refreshed, nudged the woman he was standing next to, nodded at a male and a female colleague, both out on the dance floor, and said: He's been shagging her all year. The woman he was talking to was the guy's wife. There was a scene in which my colleague had his lights punched out. Company never invited SOs again. ... 1k
fresnel28 . 4y Apparently one of the temps at my old work got completely wasted at the work Christmas party, then showed up the next morning at 8am (right on time), downed half a bottle of champagne in a single hit, said to nobody in particular fuck you all. I never liked working here anyway. and left. Nobody ever heard from her again and her contract still had three weeks left. HR made a tactical decision to leave it for a few days until they could declare she had abandoned her job and then got another temp in, who never
MuddMcCoy . 12y I got really drunk and heckled the magician that they brought for the night's entertainment. Heckling isn't the word I would use to describe it, because I was really just exaggerating my wonder for his tricks. Obviously, I came off as a sarcastic dick, but I could see that the guy wasn't really that good, so I figured I'd help him out by sounding extremely impressed with everything that he did. The result was a bunch of WOW THATS AMAZING!s and HOW DID YOU DOOOOO THAT?!s and obnoxious gasping and oohing and ahhing at the simplest shit
I_RATE_BIRDS 4y Intern at a law firm christmas party. One of the lead attorneys gathered me and all the paralegals to take tequila shots with him. The top-billing attorneys, a husband and wife team, both got hammered, took off their shoes, and began chasing each other in the ballroom shooting nerf guns at each other and the paras. Someone gave firm-branded hazmat suits as a gag gift and two other attorneys put them on and began fighting with foam swords.This was pre-Uber, so the firm paid for cabs for everyone to get home if they'd been drinking. ... 864
AnElderlyMan . 12y Abused the open bar to the point of blackout, invited many friends to come to the party, stole 3 bags of steaks, puked on the company car, and passed out in the bathroom only to be awoken by the valet guy washing my hair in the sink. I somehow ended up in the parking lot where I continued vomiting and this lead to a perfect photo ор for my со workers and lead to this becoming a Christmas card that was emailed through out the company:
biffoclippers. 1y Boss got drunk and showed off her silicone implants into people's faces without her top. Yeah that was an awkward Monday after. I believe go on have a lick became a banned phrase afterwards. ... Reply 40
jayscott . 12y Office party was at a fancy hotel's ballroom, and I was in charge of distributing the drink tickets. Big mistake. Let's just say I ended up with more than my allotment of two. On the bus ride back to the office I threw up all over my suit...in front of most my employees...and ended up sleeping on the floor underneath my desk. Nobody ever said a word. ... 15
tdasnowman . 6y Two girls that were dressed in the exact same dress and in theme with the venue got on on some tables and started go go dancing. It wasn't untill they started stripping that we realized they were employees. They were dragged down pretty quickly once the tits came out, and we never had another xmas party. As far as I know the girls weren't fired but that department cycled through people so fast no way to guarantee. ... 43
beermethestrength 0 12y My husband broke his foot prior to going to his company's Christmas party, but went anyway and drank until it didn't hurt anymore. I was thrilled to accompany him to the ER the next morning. Не also drank so much Crown Royal one year (before we were married) that he decided it was funny to spit on my dashboard on the way home, and then proceeded to projectile vomit in my front yard. He's a gem. :) ... 8
atenea-del-sol . 8y A cow orker once did a high-res scan of his junk at a very odd angle, then used the wide-format printer to turn it into a wall-sized poster. Не plastered it across an appropriately sized wall, where it hung for several weeks because it was so huge that it couldn't be easily taken in all at once, and hence was thought to be a piece of modern art. ... 31
guitarbque . 6y After drinking all day at the office most of us ended up at a dive strip club where the boss's wife and the office secretary both got topless on stage. One of the employees finger banged the wife in the club. Six months later the boss wasn't married and we had a new secretary. ... 23
nickmcsnapz . . 4y We went to the races for a Christmas party, one of the girls got on pingas, pissed herself on the members balcony then pulled her drenched underwear down and threw it off the balcony into the crowd. She never came back to work after that lol 802
InscrutableAudacity . . 1y Dangerously negligent misuse of dry ice; requiring a partial orchidectomy. Resulted in criminal charges (two year suspended sentence) and dismissal of one employee; and early retirement on health grounds for another. ... Reply 16
maxheadroome. 327d One of my colleagues got into a scrap with the security at Mcdonalds because he wouldn't stop harassing the staff for a chicken McFlurry. ... Reply 48
blanketfetish 8y I live tweeted last years Holiday party. The company had hired an Elvis-impersonator magician, and my boss got incredibly upset because he kept doing magic tricks instead of getting right to the singing portion. It almost ended in fisticuffs. I no longer work for that company. ... 176
JaronK . 5y Male One guy woke up the next day after passing out on the floor next to his desk. His motorcycle was next to him in the office. The office was on the second floor. Не had no memory of how this occurred. ... 8
buscemii . 1y We went to Brighton and one lady got very drunk & upset and insisted she was going to walk into the sea ... Reply 6
SNOC PM_ME_NSFW_FIT_GIRLS . 6y S The 80 year old secretary had one too many gin and tonics and ended up showing her bloomers to the temps, classic Margaret. ... 50
jenniferjuniper . 1 12y We've been banned from hotels before. The worst time would have to be when a bunch of management jumped while inside the elevator and stalled it. We had to call the fire dept. ... 4
Christreeania . 8y A coworker offered me to do a line of coke in the bathroom. I work at a daycare... ... 156
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