26 Funny ‘Et Tu, Brute?’ Moments

‘They all decided to turn against me’
26 Funny ‘Et Tu, Brute?’ Moments

Thousands of years ago, some guy was jumped by a bunch of senators and got stabbed to death by his best friend. Thankfully, Shakespeare wrote a play about it, so we have the perfect way to describe an unexpected betrayal. Latin might be a dead language, but the question et tu, Brutè? is alive and well.

One Redditor shared a brutal moment that had him uttering the phrase. He had his eyes on a big hunk of chocolate cake that his wife had left in the fridge, but he knew he didn’t have the guts to tackle it alone. And so, he decided to cut his son in on the action, offering him half of the cake, which would make them both complicit in the sweet crime. What he didn’t expect was his child immediately ratting him out when mom got home, saying, “Daddy ate your cake and gave me some to not tell you!” 

Other Redditors have offered up the ways their closest companions blindsided them, including tales of Monopoly sabotage, a pair of picky eaters and cannibalism at the Model U.N.

MetalGilSolid . 9y ago e Edited 9y ago My coworkers like to tease me when I diet. Came back up from lunch one day to see a slice of cake on my desk. After interrogating the usual suspects, I learned it was one of our new hires who'd always been pretty chill. Felt like a knife in my back...
 9y ago My best friend started hitting on my then girlfriend the moment I moved away for college. Two months later she dumps me for him. Now he acts like it is weird that I am angry at him. Given, he was always a pretty shifty guy with shitty morals but I didn't think he would do it to me anyway. - 3.7K ...
meatfrappe 9y ago When my fourth girlfriend came out to me as a lesbian. Not the fourth girlfriend I ever had. The fourth one that had come out as a lesbian while we were dating. Though I suppose that she was also the fourth girlfriend I had ever had. I liked her so much more than the previous three. Why did I attract so many of them? - 6.4K ...
ProfessorHearthstone . 9y ago Was arguing with girlfriend and my dog growled at me 7.8K ...
HardKnockRiffe 9y ago My son and | were home alone while my wife was out with her mom. She had a piece of cake from the night before in the refrigerator that I wasted no time tearing into. In order to seal our fates, I offered my son half. Не happily ate it and we went about our merry, chocolatey, fudge-frosted way. A few hours later, I'm laying down, watching TV, when I hear my wife walk into the house. Not even 30 seconds later, I hear, Daddy ate your cake and gave me some to not tell you! Fucking
swagyolo420Bob 9y ago My cousin and I have been playing together since childhood. One day, my family gave me a piece of dick with a really fat piece of skin on it. I don't like fatty food so I refused to eat it. Не immediately loudly said I LOVE THE SKIN, STOP WASTING FOOD to impress the adults. Kissass lil prick... Edit: duck 2.5K ...
Ask_A_Sadist 9y ago I had a friend who was looking to change jobs. It seemed like she always had bad luck when it came to asshole bosses. I told her how much I loved my job and how chill my boss was and how she would probably love working where I worked. I had her apply, gave her a good recommendation for the job, basically got her hired by me. Turns out she was a shit employee. Always complaining, always calling in sick. So when it finally came for her to get fired for her piss poor attendance she went
Fellwarre 9y ago Gave my buddy a ride with my wife in the car. Не sat in the back seat and had to move my trash can (yes, I keep a trashcan in the car.) Не looked in the trash can and said, Whoah, somebody's been sneaking a butt-ton of candy bars. The look my wife gave me... 1.7K ... -
ImEasilyConfused 11y ago Growing up I absolutely loved playing baseball and was fairly good. I seriously thought I had a future in it. Then, after a few consecutive years of not being picked for All-Star teams, I started to feel curious. My buddy who made all-star and was just as confused as I, asked his dad who was an assistant coach. His dad came to me and said I better ask my father, who was also an assistant coach. Come to find out, my dad repeatedly pulled me from all-star simply because he didn't want people to think I made
SpanglyJoker 9y ago | was playing monopoly. Me, my brother and my mum left in the game. I was winning, but my mum and brother combined would have held a stronger position than me. All of a sudden, mum decides she's bored and donates all of her assets to my brother. It was absolute sabotage, an event that is still spoken about two years later. - 1.2K ...
Frewt 9y ago Harmless to the stuff I read here. Among a group of friends | told a joke to one of them, he laughed and moments later he tells that joke to the rest of the group. Bitch, give credit where credit is due 535 ...
pavlovsdoge 11y ago I left a job to move out of state, and then a new, better one opened up at my former workplace. They call and offer me the job. I knew all my former co-workers were vying for it and that many of them were typical corporate backstabbers. But this one girl, she was a friend. A good friend. I didn't feel right swiping this job out from under her, so I called her, told her about it and basically said, This is a great opportunity for me but I'm already on my way out of town, so
cbelt3 9y ago In high school Model UN, my friends 'overthrew' my country, recalled the Ambassador (me) and hanged and 'ate' me. Because Uganda. I had more time to hang out with a girl I met and watch the shenanigans. And then we dated for a year until college. So getting murdered and eaten by cannibalistic Ugandans was great for my love life ! 690 ...
Minhaul 11y ago When I was picked last for basketball teams in elementary school. Both team captains were my best friends. I'm not very good at sports... - 49 ...
agps118 11y ago Edited 11y ago This was long ago but still hurts to this day. My friend and I were doing a heat engine for a school project that took us a year to do, he did the design and I did the work. We couldn't finish it for the end of the semester so we had to wait after holidays to present it. We decided to take a month to relax and carry on later, or so I thought. around a month later ,without doing contact with anyone, | recieved an e-mail from my teacher saying that my
MoroseOverdose 11y ago When i was 8 my best friend Jimmy invited me to go snow sledding in the mountains with his family. A week before the trip he calls me and says that he wants to take his other friend instead. Seriously, fuck you Jimmy. 38 ...
EwotAbbasmoi 11y ago When | was playing super smash bros melee with my brother and his friends. I was using Luigi and he was Ness, when his friends started to gang up on us. I had the fire flower and he had the baseball bat. I was shooting one of them with the fire flower, when my brother went ahead and charged up the baseball bat and hit a homerun on me. I felt so betrayed. That was the last time | let him have any drop weapons. - 385 ...
notduddeman 11y ago asked my dad how to spell Girls. (I wasn't even in school at this point) I had envisioned a sign that would proclaim to the world that females were not permitted within the confines of my domicile. The sign would caution that there were 'no girls allowed.' My father, being a wise-ass promptly spelled it out to me. n-o-t-d-u-d- d-e-m-a-n. Having no reason to mistrust my progenitor I jotted it down with my finest crayon colors and swiftly placed it upon the entry way. Once my work was done my father quickly gathered the entire clan, consisting
Vertical_Sunset 11y ago This is lame but I used to run a Minecraft server with a bunch of friends and apparently I got too tyrannical ( as he was ambitious)a and they all decided to turn against me. My closest friend blew up the map. Fuck you Dan my buildings were always better. - 319 ...
LBKewee 9y ago My best friend had just moved out of my house and he left some of his old posters up. My other friend comes over and claims that he would have wanted me to have this and proceeds to take an old James Bond poster off of my wall. I have never been so close to wanting to knock someone out ever. He's a piece of trash anyway. - 266 ...
Reddit_PI 9y ago To make a long story short, myself and handful of my closest friends had a game of Risk which lasted over 3 years. Eventually it was my closest ally who ultimately stabbed me in the back. I asked him why he did it, and he looked at me stone-faced & said, Because you don't deserve it. - 139 ...
Babelfishbabel E 11y ago My roommates and I were trying to figure out where to imbibe copious amounts of alcohol a few months back. Out of the 4 of us, 1 really wanted to stay home and was getting butthurt about it, myself and the 3rd wanted to go to a bar, and the 4th hadn't made up his mind. Не finally decided and told us, yeah, I'm actually going to go out somewhere else around 9...sorry. The 1st roommate was already a little drunk and yelled, et tu, Brandon?! Brandon stared at him for a few seconds and finally
 9y ago Cold day. Fireplace was on. I sat on the couch and acquired a lap cat. My wife sat down next to me, and the cat moved over. I've never forgiven this betrayal. To this day I short-pour her food. - 268 ...
 . 9y ago When my friend told our teacher I was drinking alchohol underage instead of admitting that it was her. | offered to take a blood test to prove it, but they didn't care. Thankfully my parents believed me. 47 ...
ZxncM8 11y ago Going for a nuke on Modern warfare two and getting trapped by a teammate causing me to die only 3 kills from my first nuke. 5 ...
MothrasMandibles 9y ago Chucking eggs at the new kids was a popular way to welcome them to my high school. It was basically allowed during the first week of the year. Most of my friends got egged at some point during the first week, but I didn't and went home and bragged to my mom about it. So she egged me. In my own house. - 4.9K ...

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