33 of the Funniest Tweets from the Week of September 9, 2024

I believe it is
33 of the Funniest Tweets from the Week of September 9, 2024

It wasn’t just pet-eating propaganda this week. There was a lot of other news, too. 

For starters, it looks like Will Ferrell’s road trip with trans bestie Harper Steele was quite the learning experience because the comedian revealed the SNL impression he would never do today. Meanwhile, Emmy co-host Eugene Levy promised that he has no intentions of telling jokes at anyone’s expense at this weekend’s ceremony. On the flip side, Andrew Garfield and Florence Pugh have seen the memes mocking their new movie, and they want you to know they’re here for all the horsing around. And Tim Robinson’s The Chair Company is the next half-hour comedy headed to HBO. The Adam McKay-backed comedy will follow a man investigating a “far-reaching conspiracy” after an embarrassing workplace incident.

This week also had its fair share of tweets that had us jumping out of our seats. The funniest included those about the club serving up hot beats and hot soup, the most hilarious affair possible and someone wearing their grieving durag.

Mav @Maverick4king.1 16h ... As soon as I walked in the liquor store the guy looked at me and told his coworker to pass me a bottle of Beyoncé I don't know how I feel about that. #SirDavis AA dog sitting gay x 46 792 13.8K del 203K
Andrew @gmengalaxy 19h ... 10 $200 I'LL DO WHATEVER Play qb for the Giants 126 4,274 41.3K 1.8M
Michelle @michelleDbelle.17h ... It's still inside my pencil is the best answer I've ever had from a first grader who was asked, Where's your journal writing? 31 199 2,208 32.1K
Daddy Go Fish @daddygofish 13h me: did you have fun on your playdate? my 9yo: yes, but that was the wrong Logan. Next week can I have a playdate with the Logan who's my friend? 27 123 4,245 58.1K
sadiq @SadiqoJN. 6h I forgot to remove my durag before a Teams call and my colleague asked if I'm grieving. 272 3,231 31.1K 833K
mary @theoceanblooms 4h Nobody wants to hear it but the actual funniest outcome is if these two have been having an affair. JLo Updates @lopez_upda... 17h Jennifer Lopez holds Matt Damon's hand as they have a serious conversation at Toronto Film Festival 44 616 20.3K 485K
Doth @DothTheDoth-17h Having a victorian era woman autumn (becoming isolated and weird) 23 3,518 12.9K del 276K

Image provided by Cracked

rayne fisher-quann @raynefq 4h after years of resistance and self- 70 delusion it feels good to finally let go and just show my hairdresser a picture of zooey deschanel 3 64 3,344 60.5K
DreamLeaf @Drea... 1d ... I like how this has just become the official lore THE MOLD MADE HER TRANSPHOBIC 26:12 Did Black Mold Really Make J. K. Rowling Transphobic? ... Brigitte Empire . 27K views.7 days ago 220 5,263 89.9K 1M
harry sins @tommysalami1017.16h ... i thought this was a dj but she is serving soup 8 191 2,234 51.5K
a @annab1ake.1 1d If I knew life was gonna be like this, I woulda held my breath in the delivery room 175 8,046 38.1K 872K
andi (e/alb) @Nexuist 1d I was at a bar with a friend last weekend where there were at least four first dates happening around us. On one of them, the guy excused himself to go to the bathroom, and another guy immediately rolled up asking for her number and she GAVE IT TO HIM 25 94 4,566 del 147K
cathy @catherinebouris 8h i am starting to genuinely believe that stan brain should be added to the dsm-5 mimi @wat... 1d as someone who has been here the whole time, i cannot express to you how different the aura is with her and travis. like this is something special and feels permanent? De 4 144 3,800 108K
rebeka @bekaemilia 1d i don't miss him anymore and find him repulsive 98 3,038 25.9K 498K
The tumboy @TheTumboy.4d TNT-core FILM UPDATES Film Updates @FilmUpdates.4 4d Amy Adams names her 4 favourite films: 'Vertigo' 'The Shawshank Redemption' 'St Elmo's Fire' 'Forrest Gump' (Via @letterboxd) tiff tiff Ontario VISA tiff tiff O Gift V ti tiff Ontario VISA O tiff tiff A tiff Royal tif Bank tiff VI ff lift tiff TO NE tiff VISA Detaro TO tiff O TEF ti biff O FILM tiff 6 г the tiff 69 TOR tifi Ontario FF VISA tif She knows which watch I time ones every they're on. VIS VERTIGO is Forrest Gump S io tif and SHAWSHANK TORON
'@evergaoI. 5d ... me when i paid an etsy witch to curse my bf because he was ignoring me and then he started throwing up everywhere !Latroy (send me all ur money) 9/6/24 Me when I pray on someone's downfall but something genuinely bad happens to them 337 9.8K 228K 7.2M
Ben Rosen @ben_rosen . 4d ... i said to my wife, hey brat summer is over, what kind of fall should I have? she said a fatal one 66 5.2K 65K 1.2M
Grip Bayless @talleyberrybaby5 5d ... ok but in a good way Michael Harriot @michaelharriot - 5 5d Bananabread tastes like it went to college to be cake but got pregnant freshman year. 14 1.1K 5.2K 224K
TWINKDEFCON @twinkdefcon . 5d amazing things are happening in my YouTube recs 8:29 President Kim Il Sung's last Instructions DPRK Video Archive 741K views 11 years ago 0:47 When The Cocaine Was Pure, White People Had Rhythm 4.8K 67 72K 1M
tracy clayton jr the 3rd @brokeymcpoverty.4d they are staging a coo a_london_pigeon @a_london_pigeon . 5 5d Pigeons together are not a flash-mob of vermin. We are bird-life sharing your neighbourhood. 25 469 5.1K 200K
tia @ilovevoicenotes • 4d the idea of this happening is making me laugh extremely loud like cat @catluvr89.4d video autoscroll just opened a link, scanned my face id, and closed itself 3.7K 113 99K 2.8M
boog @niyK_ 5d I keep my vibrators under my pillow like they guns or sum 239 6.1K 34K 1.2M
hawktu twins @sicksadchris . 4d meeting beyonce and telling her i loved her in goldmember and mentioning nothing about her music career just to see if it throws her off 180 5.2K 96K 1.8M
van haley @vanhaley_yt.4 4d the hottest girl you know is surrounded by piles of stuff 84 8.8K 66K del 1.9M
M @batmanstwink- 5d because that would ruin his pretty face and they like it next question DC KAL @ARKHAMPUNK 5d i've always wondered why the batman villains don't just try to shoot him here ? 157 14K 258K 4.5M
sorrel @Sorrelish 4d ... The 'people' in question: Metro @MetroUK 5d Thunder and lightning over London left people 'worried the world was ending' trib.al/EleiOnZ 94 12K 252K 5.2M
smi @smino 4d not the margellas emmy To @emxlymargaret. 5d you know i had to stunt on 'em 16K 200 146K 4.6M
jynx @jynxbby 4d ... i should've bought a house in 2007 instead of playing on my pink nintendo ds 95 23K 107K 2.3M
little miss princess @brattyb4rbie. 4d this is so wife in movie who died flashback montage marie @misterrmama 4d 6 year old nephew took this 112 281K 6.3M 9.1K
blorbus morbus @noggytoes 2d this genuinely has me in fucking tears goonie Today at 7:38 PM for $800 that ps5 better turn into an android for me to fuck cuz there's just no way Maddie P Today at 7:40 PM notice how theyre trying to fuck the ps5 instead of playing games 49 8.3K 98K 976K
Jack @jackfromohio - 3 3d Nah man don't buy AirPods. You need the Sony WH-1000XM5-WHCH720N-WF1000XM5-CH520 1.2K 29K 398K 12M
S @REDSEASHAWTY. 4d I could never join a cult I don't be listening 83 3.8K 13K 598K
e c@itl!n @laplacescrowley 23h ... Isn't that that one Chappell Roan song ВО BURNHAM WORDS WORDS WORDS Во Burnham WORDS WORDS WORDS  I'm a feminine Eminem, 31 3,678 42.6K 543K

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