51 of the Funniest Tweets from the Week of July 15, 2024

I’d go with Parmy, but okay
51 of the Funniest Tweets from the Week of July 15, 2024

It’s been a busy, busy week. The Bear scored a record number of Emmy nominations. Donald Glover confessed that the 30 Rock writers’ room was a very scary place. David Cross wished that the last season of Arrested Development never existed. James Corden admitted that he struggled with imposter syndrome when first becoming host of The Late Late Show. Chuck Lorre maintained that he’s going to keep making sitcoms whether networks want them or not. And sadly, we lost comedy giant Bob Newhart

But the most bizarre news of the week might have been The Financial Times revealing that Warner Bros. Discovery is allegedly workshopping a “dramatic plan” to split the studio into two different companies: one for streaming operations and one for its linear networks. The potential move would be made in the hopes of bolstering the company’s struggling stock price and managing a whopping $40 billion in debt. 

The irony, of course, is that the headline-making WarnerMedia and Discovery mega-merger was finalized barely two years ago despite experts and consumers alike decrying the monopoly as a bad business move. 

Per usual, there was much more intentionally laugh-out-loud material on the timeline this week. The funniest tweets included those about a sign that the economy is bad, a request that can’t be honored and someone giving allergic reaction. 

Paul McCallion @OrangePaulp.21h ... I dream of being discussed this way chicken alfredo pacino @n.... 1d SHES so EMBARRASSING but her body is tea so I can't stay mad 32 6,560 94.6K 2.6M
joe-nado wrangler @hackerm... 21h ... had to get this out of my system UNIVERSAL BIG FAT LIAR RUZING NONE FACTOR RUCH MACK PG POLENCE - THOUGIC ELEMENTS AAC - Metario - - - between - 48 1,326 15.2K 409K
Hugh The Wrench Janus MBA 1d ... Is my buddy cooked? Dude It's 330 am At my sisters house And I'm playing cfb 25 I took a break cus I'm bored There is food and beer all over the coucb just jacked off And there's a camera on in theroom I forgot they have dog cameras I'm so cooked tions silenced 183 1,294 53.5K 3.9M
ellory smith @ellorysmith.2 23h ... 15 years ago I learned to play this on the trumpet and every member of my family wanted me dead popculture @notgwenda... 1d 20 years ago, Kelly Clarkson released 'Breakaway' CG 13 454 16.4K 544K
Sara Schonfeld @SaraSchon 1d guy told me his favorite book was the canterbury tales. I thought it would impress him to recite the prologue in middle english. and, well, it certainly made an impression. 332 521 25.4K 929K
Frankie @frankiesmash2.14h - + 127.3K x 5,571 comments Hunny Bee Tan the baby 2d Reply 7,386 179 5,024 76.7K 1.7M
megan @chismosavirus 12h ... hmm should we take the elevator or the eating disorder stairs MOR ENP -LMCKCAL K1 KCAL -1.5KKCAL -1.05PKCAL -0.5KKCAL -0.84KKCAL -0.735KCAL -0.630KCAL -0.52SKCAL -0. 420KCAL -0.315KCAL -0. 210KCAL 245 14.9K 254K 3M
sophie @leggyinbio 1d ... i'm so fucking mad right now i just found out that my computer has been giving me error messages for the past month saying it thinks system32 doesn't exist because THIS IMAGE DIDNT PROPERLY TRANSFER FROM MY OLD PC AND GOT PUT IN THE OPERATING SYSTEM FILES 188 4,983 64.3K 1.1M
no context memes @weirdd... 5h ... How it feels to verbally explain something funny you saw on the internet + 53055 23 285 3,924 112K
Nick Prueher @nickprueher 22h ... My new thing is making fake magazines and leaving them in waiting rooms. GIAMATTI'S trailer! NE adidas ide PAUL GIAMATTI'S tratter! Actor 140 Tobolowski gracter Tells AIL ctor WALSHI KAN WALSH Emerido SEURA MUSC KAM S will you be S Emmat our ountiel Fashion Des - with ANN with - - Paymer-mania! DOWD Paymer-manial our puntie? Juley secrets from you favorite City Sticker 200 - break - Fashion - City Sincer Dom & Dairy Mad about ANN DOWD STEVE Done BY you 1 Mac - STEVE! 485 2,666 23.9K 926K
julian @YEAROFTHEWIZARD.1 16h ... Smoking weed when you're bald must be like damn i'm so fuckin high and i'm bald 274 11.6K 121K 2.8M
yosnier @Yosnier_.11 ... im gonna be so powerful when i i figure out how to stop losing my mind... 62 11.3K 47.9K del 935K
Saint Joseph @JuliusIrvington 1 16h ... you may be old but are you 36? Matt Pinner @Matt_Pinner . 1d You may be old but, are you this old?? GREEN C.O.Z. e LICE 665 2,872 83.5K 2M
meghan @banhmigoddess 2h You know the economy is bad when we start retweeting the groceries we want madeleine> @pilatesgirly.3d it doesn't get better than this Lindt EXCELLENCE 70% CACAO DARK NOIR Chocolate 100g 6 881 11.6K 168K
Semsono, o pão mafrense @de... 1d ... - @leftistexe. 2d do u think karl marx was a marxist because of his last name or was it just a coincidence 225 45.1K 410K 7.9M
Robert McL Wilson @Parisbob2... 1d ... DAVID From the gentleman at the bar. 44 2,187 22.2K 1.5M
katie @katefeetie 16h we stayed at an air bnb with the most perfect pillows. a revelation. perfectly firm but soft. my neck stopped hurting. so I wrote down the brand and item number from the tag and looked it up and they're the same pillows we have at home 596 4,570 159K 3.2M
Peach PRC @peachprc. 2d ... sean but it's short for parmesean cheese 170 6,379 70.4K 2.7M
Shane Gillis @Shanemgillis . 3h Thank you. AB : @AB84.5h Cracker of the Day #CTESPN @Shanemgillis 828 9.5K 210K del 7.2M
Melanie Bracewell @meladoodle - 1d *sad borat voice*: my wife Isla Fisher Soft Launches New BF Post Divorce By Posting A Pic Of Someone's Hand On Her Butt ٨ 17 333 8.8K 320K
LUKE BARNETT @LukeBarnett.20h Hear me out. Call one division HBO. Mainly prestige TV. Another Discovery. Reality, mostly. Keep the big movies under something called Warner Bros. DF DiscussingFilm @DiscussingFilm - dd Warner Bros Discovery is considering splitting in half. The studio would split into 2 different companies, one for streaming& studio assets and one for all cable network assets. (Source: ft.com/content/be716e...) WARNER BROS. WB DISCOVERY 157 3.7K 38K 1.5M
Bolt Railway Dog @B_railway_dog. 1d ... Imao a guy just told me he was a navy seal ok...i didn't ask about your fursona Likes but i guess that sounds cool 465 38 11K 188K 2.8M
#EndFemicidelnSA @iamlindz_. 1d ... Me after a heavy gossip session Tshepo Ranko @Tshepo_Ranko. 1d Ey man, who are we to judge? 78 6.5K 24K del 1M
mia @mia11112233. 1d ... told my gf that i'm really into getting itchy lately and that i am low key in my itchy era but it turns out i was having an allergic reaction 21 1.7K 38K 860K
@ecIipsmoon - 1d ... bored so i'm in the dryer 597 3.8K 77K 1.6M
Moony @Tarte_Lune. 1d ... JP @jpbrammer. 1 1d I'll be honest kitten the amulet is driving daddy insane 13 5.6K 60K del 2.2M
(siric) @michibuns . 2d I know a hot dog hate to see me coming 114 9.6K 41K del 1.6M
bfa agonistes @superloafcat. 2d i don't want to ignore your bird W setup? (ignore my bird) 247 11K 183K 3.9M
blair @fshnspo 3d my favorite thing about her is that she will do all this and then go and smoke cigarettes emily @marantmuse. 4d wanna be this obsessed W my healing journey planted sense GOLD SEA MOSS GEL مؤسسة - like - وتعليم A Food 1.1K 27K 364K 11M
Sisa @TheTitanBaddie 3d ... Well when he releases Be Without You his fee can go up too. Prom Prom @effizzzyy 4d Power really paid Omari hardwick $150k per episode but they're paying Mary J blige $400k. STAR POWER-GHOST S 63 4.8K 32K del 1M
b @sheeshgwws.2 2d ... frankie just happy to be there and have the paps take pics of his brand new nose allegra @theegrandeheels.2 2d ariana grande, frankie & doug leaving ethan slater's show tonight 29 310 17K del 696K
Jordyn @jrdynjy 3d ... Throw in gender dysphoria. Let's make it hot. DF DiscussingFilm @DiscussingFilm . 5d What emotions do you think should be introduced in a potential INSIDE OUT 3? 18K 20 1.2K 422K
meg memes @goldfishlover69.2d ... This is how I just found out my sister is getting a divorce Google You're no longer part of Kevin's family group Hi Meg, You're no longer part of Kevin's family on Google. This means you won't be able to access Google services used by your family group. You can only switch family groups once in a 12- month period. 1 10 1.1K 19K
zoë bread @zoebread 7/12/24 no one should be worried about ai taking their jobs Please select one of the options there are no options Please select one of the options youre not giving me any options Please select one of the options 90 1.7K 53K 908K
Maizie @postboob 2d you make a white boy get a boner and he'll look down at it and say some shit like jeez louise 559 6K 94K 5.6M
smooth brained brat @cowbitch . 4d him: y'all probably talk to so many guys when you're out me and the girls: DIE 378K 39 925 5.5K
Jake Cornell @JakeWCornell. 3d These towels will endure situations you cannot fathom POP CRAVE Pop Crave @PopCrave.3d Charli XCX debuts official 'BRAT' towel. III charli XCX towel BRAT (towel) 60,95 EUR POP CRAVE 133 8.1K 182K 4.7M
BPD HERO @angerrv2.6 6d Stood too close to the scanner ffs NCR NSAI authority Casa 1 item DUNNES STORES MONSTER PIPE €5.10 MONSTER PIPE Please scan next item. a Search Key In Code 0.000 kg Total * - 1 the fay €5.1 del 7.8M 236K 12K 199
@olivependrghst - dd Ryan Gosling filmography be like : lu @SOMETLLMES 1d the world stopped (my world) when this pic dropped. 51 8.9K 145K del 2.2M
Oriana Nichelle @OrianaNichelle. 1d ... me staring at the pickle on your plate wondering if I could have it 226 21.6K 142K 4.9M
Scott Chegg @buckfastbadlad. dd ... looks like it mate yeah Golden Memories a... 12/29/20 Gravy on Chips Yes or No? 98 4,414 172K 7M
Mike Jones @Tjayyx2.1d Pills apparently OG Kidd @YourGirLIsA... 1d I just popped 2 pills...it's a Tuesday. wtf am I on right now? 76 3,872 45K 1.1M
jules team stardust @CRYP... . 1d ... i love art school cause all the whiteboards have doodles & when i drew this cute fluffy creature someone else from another class drew this WRETCHED version 61 3,197 38.3K 381K
. @the0nlyalexus 1d ... Looking for a 3 bedroom house with pool for $12 223 8,691 43.8K del 977K
zife comms open! @screwbra... 1d ... no matter how many times i read this it makes me laugh  . 6y I slipped on icy stairs last winter and swear I saw my own butt crack as | fell. No one believes me. 13.6k J@thescaryredditus 36 4,500 87.2K del 1.5M
Pastor Kyle. @itsqail 1d Twitter always so good during chaotic events Ngl if the world is ending first thing ima do is open this app 368 50.8K 346K del 6M
tido bling @its_tiidoo. 1d i lose all respect for a t-shirt once i've slept in it 148 13.8K 105K 1.8M
friend @Fredward3948576 1 dd whew this reading shit is no joke. word after word after word 64 8,504 87.3K 1.9M
golden gate theophite @revho... 12h ... it is extremely funny that the official Minions lore says that the Minions always work for the most evil human being alive and also that they were all in hibernation through the middle of the 20th century 49 849 30.8K del 916K
headscorpio. @desjustweeted .1d ... yall better learn geometry before i start getting mad IMANI @prettygirll4L.2d my life finna do a whole 360 I can feel it 348 10.1K 90.9K 2.1M
i like food @messedupfoods - 1d Theo Priestley @tprstly I bet nobody under 40 knows what this is. Michael McKean @MJMcKean Right, because all bread is digital now. 329 5,534 189K 2.4M

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