60 of the Funniest Tweets from the Week of July 8, 2024
![60 of the Funniest Tweets from the Week of July 8, 2024](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/imageset/7/9/1/1113791_320x180.jpg)
Another week, another slate of new news. Jack Quaid has decided to wear his “nepo baby” title as a badge of honor — even if it means having to work twice as hard if he ever ventures into romcoms. Scarlett Johansson is terrified of Weekend Update’s joke swap, calling husband Colin Jost and Michael Che’s annual tradition “painful.” And apparently neither Nick Kroll nor John Mulaney had a favorite Roy child, as the pair failed to correctly answer a Succession-themed question during their joint appearance on Who Wants to Be A Millionaire?.
Then there’s the upcoming Deadpool sequel. But before Deadpool & Wolverine could flash its claws, Marvel Studios President Kevin Feige had some explaining to do — particularly about a certain sex act included in the movie. In an interview with Variety this week, Feige revealed that he had to define the term “pegging” for some of his colleagues. Don’t give him too much credit for being the rare cool studio exec, though: He maintained he only knew what it was because of the first Deadpool, and the first Deadpool only.
Another week also meant another slate of new tweets. The funniest included those about a sequel within a sequel, the NFL coach getting a new lease on life and some very bad marriage advice.
![@xylottie 2d char manning Sorry but boomers on Facebook are actually so funny, what on earth is this Leyton Resident News ... X 2 d Lea Bridge Road still closed 20 2 comments Like Send Comment Share 12 373 16K 316K](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/imageset/7/1/9/1113719.jpg)
![bebo, chicago (b)rat czar @BebopOtt.21h b(ebo) rat (czar) Kamala when she heard Joe say, President Putin Swingline - 0:08 II I - From veep reactions 79 5K 59K del 2.7M](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/imageset/7/2/8/1113728.jpg)
![lor @lorgilmors 3d tom cruise: fka y2keijun @lookadere . 3d love this gay little blond bitch S0000000 bad VA A122 SERESIN 4 1.1K 32K 1.2M](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/imageset/7/2/4/1113724.jpg)
![Dr Sean Travers @seanjetravers . 2d Using your old student card to get a discount at movie theatres 2 ) b O T n ) U T ( . . ) O T 5 1 OHC' I O .:) u T 0 :) P O O n GS :) 75 ت p U O T O n n ST D a n ت p 19 1K 34K 598K](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/imageset/7/3/0/1113730.jpg)
![char @cha_rrrrrrrrrr 2d asked someone to help jump start my car and both of us had to google how to open the front hoods of our cars ? 68 3.6K 86K 1.3M](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/imageset/7/2/7/1113727.jpg)
![clay @claybaebae_.. 2d Apparently telling your friends not to stress about their wedding because it's your first marriage is not the right thing to say 54 1.9K 44K 1.2M](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/imageset/7/2/9/1113729.jpg)
![awlivv ( era) @awlivv. . 3d just found out me and my neighbor are BOTH naked neighbors... 69 54 4.6K 531K](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/imageset/7/2/2/1113722.jpg)
![OneTopic @OneTopicAtATime 2d this is 100% real news from Canada. Giant phallus-shaped iceberg floating in Conception Bay surprises residents of Dildo, Canada News By Stephanie Pappas published May 2, 2023 A phallus-shaped iceberg hovered off the coast of Dildo, Newfoundland in Conception Bay before collapsing. f X P 661 12K 105K 4.8M](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/imageset/7/2/5/1113725.jpg)
![Lucas P. Johnson @LucasPJohn 3d Someone airdrop this man into Bushwick so he can become a nonbinary name-consultant Felony (Pheloneigh) that is such a pretty name 0:49 Felony From thinfluencer 44 1K 14K 386K](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/imageset/7/1/8/1113718.jpg)
![Count Dracula @gutzpills.3d Vhy put us against each other vhen we can make love #1 Space Jam 2 Lover @JoshuaTookes 4d Which franchise was better? HOTEL TRANSYLVANIA3 SUMMER VACATION Sm DESPICABLE MC2 268 21K 229K 4.2M](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/imageset/7/2/1/1113721.jpg)
![Complex Pop Culture COM PLEX SOM @ComplexPop . dd POP CULTURE me on july 1, 2026 46 10K 36K del 1.1M](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/imageset/7/2/6/1113726.jpg)
![SLUG @generalslug 4d ... me at 9:25 AM: still waking up, potentially even still asleep my partner at 9:35 AM: Today 9:25 AM There's a biker bar in Illinois called Poopys 18 206 5.2K del 111K](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/imageset/7/2/3/1113723.jpg)
![Brooks Otterlake @i_zzzzzz•2 2d X McDonald's a Most Ordered Le plus Reviews 200+ Ratings Ratings . 12 public reviews A Ashley Y 23-03-01 DoorDash Order Its McDonald 320K 16 473 13K](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/imageset/7/1/7/1113717.jpg)
![so BAD IT'S GOOD Ryne Bailey @ryanbailey25.2d Omg i bet she makes him watch Vanderpump Rules Page Six Page Six @PageSix 2 2d Jordon Hudson, 23, helped boyfriend Bill Belichick, 72, realize 'there is more in life than just football:' report trib.al/sSkfwiW ORI UR 38 984 19K del 1.1M](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/imageset/7/1/4/1113714.jpg)
![cole @juul_survivor. 2d ... Me parallel parking Aver Mundo brat and it's the same but 360 E there's three ... Charli XCX more songs so it's not Bumping that Bumping that Bumping that 60 6.1K 92K 1.7M](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/imageset/7/2/0/1113720.jpg)
![erika @yeeeerika 3d ever since i was a little girl i knew i wanted a crunchwrap supreme 22 3K 22K 750K](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/imageset/7/1/5/1113715.jpg)
![isabel @wisepissmage 2d ... My boyfriend is trying to teach me how to play dark souls right now and it feel like when your dad is trying to do your math homework with you while you cry at the kitchen table 144 6,906 106K 2.4M](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/imageset/7/1/6/1113716.jpg)
![Dirmax @JustDirmax. 1d ... Ohunene @nenesimah 47 @Reallest_ Lord take 2 years from my life and add to hers. 17 @DamiTalkss Too far man, wtf 47 @Reallest_ Lord take 2 from this man's life also 672 7,242 94.7K 2.3M](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/imageset/7/1/3/1113713.jpg)
![eleanor @dimestorepaglia 1d ... how it feels to call it grass instead of weed 50 2,836 47.6K 1M](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/imageset/7/1/2/1113712.jpg)
![:( @itsoverkitten.1 1d I need to tell a stranger everything that has happened to me in the past 10 years and ask them if they think my anger is justified or not 118 11.8K 60.1K del 1.7M](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/imageset/7/1/1/1113711.jpg)
![Unrepentant thought criminal 1d ... Today I learned about an influencer named MyKayla Skinner Harmer and this is from her gender reveal party BABY HARMER 113 4,264 63.8K 3.8M](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/imageset/7/1/0/1113710.jpg)
![Michael Fry @BigDirtyFry 1d Don't forget CrustTHEYceans I'm Jeff @whosjeffiam 1d The only two genders I recognize LobstHER LobstSIR 37 5,456 69.5K 1.6M](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/imageset/7/0/9/1113709.jpg)
![Degenerate Homosexual Cring... 1d ... Someone in the comments referred to this movie as the gay man's Scarface and the logic is simply flawless. Tim Fitzgerald @tim_fitzge... 2d Film peaked as we know it with Charlie's Angels: Full Throttle. CC 2:17 29 3,248 24.4K 911K](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/imageset/7/0/7/1113707.jpg)
![Genius Of Lunch @ConorHaloR... . 1d ... Absolutely genius mind... I can only imagine what it's like in his head Jerma 15/06/2020 05:11 - - - - - im gonna be focusing so hard on squidward during the mri 8 Jerma 15/06/2020 05:11 WB - - - - - i i hope they see him 10 27 4,284 78.5K 1.2M](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/imageset/7/0/8/1113708.jpg)
![sydney @mornings0da 1d Just typed the word we'd've. Real contraction heads won't be fazed by that type of deep cut 383 10.1K 158K 3.6M](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/imageset/7/0/6/1113706.jpg)
![hlumzii.xo @kingsee_ya.9h WiLL SANTINO Lazzyyyyyy @em_Lazzy.1d 21yrs - 35yrs, how is life? 37 6,047 24.5K 1.5M](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/imageset/7/0/5/1113705.jpg)
![molly conger @socialistdogmom 1d ... my dogs don't really like any of the dogs in the neighborhood except this one fat old chihuahua. he lives on the third floor of an apartment building & if their balcony door is open when we walk by, they will stand on the sidewalk & cry for him. who is he. a secret dog celebrity. 17 42 2,074 del 34.3K](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/imageset/6/9/8/1113698.jpg)
![Nikita Gill @nktgill 1d Just discovered that this whole time when I said Gen Z, my auntie thought | was saying talking about an absolutely unhinged but badass friend I had whose full name was Gennifer. I learned this because she asked me today how is your friend Gennifer Z doing these days? 155 1,924 57.5K](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/imageset/6/9/9/1113699.jpg)
![с lleen @cadetcoll 16h Getting older doesn't mean bendering less it means bendering smarter 6 879 6,134 262K](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/imageset/6/9/7/1113697.jpg)
![Pandy Fackler @ThatBrenna. 1d I'm often mistaken for an adult because of my age 11 1,516 7,935 202K](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/imageset/6/9/6/1113696.jpg)
![sk @kirkxxs 1d ... bro what + - 1371K 1371K 2,966 2,966 sk @kirkxxs.1 1d opened tik tok and immediately saw a parrot with a jheri curl?? 2 4,188 52.8K 1.3M](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/imageset/7/0/3/1113703.jpg)
![das kupotal @pawgtism 16h ... scientists are calling me the one person that is allowed to put q-tips into their ear canal saying things like she's just so careful and i don't know how she does it 21 4,006 43.3K 749K](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/imageset/7/0/4/1113704.jpg)
![Destyn (Book Editor) @desty... 22h ... if you try to correct my grammar, I will think fewer of you 232 450 4,427 125K](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/imageset/7/0/2/1113702.jpg)
![Magnets @PerthshireMags-7 7h ... aha, i see once again that my eyes are itchy. i iknow exactly what will resolve this- giving them a good old rub. ho-ho, it didn't work this time? better give it another good old try for good measure for surely the last effort was insufficient. surely once more will be the ticket 13 1,566 18.1K del 404K](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/imageset/6/9/1/1113691.jpg)
![Grip Bayless @talleyberr... . 3h ... I am on my second week of biweekly pay so today I will be showing you how to make a quesadilla out of paper towels 114 2,544 11.6K 328K](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/imageset/7/0/1/1113701.jpg)
![ege @egeofanatolia- 11h ... Excuse me? DEADLINE Deadline Hollywood @... 12h As movie theater seats are still damp from Challengers showings, director Luca Guadagnino has already moved on to his next production. deadline.com/2024/07/julia-... 8 551 20.1K 942K](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/imageset/7/0/0/1113700.jpg)
![kim @KimmyMonte 1d maybe crabs walk sideways bc they're self conscious of how their ass looks in that tight shell. we don't know. 6 230 2,838 del 60.4K](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/imageset/6/9/0/1113690.jpg)
![valerie @birkinpilled 1d ... what it feels like to get high and lay in bed after a long day 28 4,527 42K 914K](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/imageset/6/9/5/1113695.jpg)
![James Parker @panoparker 1d Paid over £232 for a train ticket if the ticket inspector doesn't show up I'm going looking for him 249 8,203 226K 4.9M](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/imageset/6/9/3/1113693.jpg)
![@blingee_support-21h ... Everyone on the bus entertained by onion rolling around 24 780 16.9K 276K](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/imageset/6/9/4/1113694.jpg)
![francis @frank_logged_on 19h ... me if i was in italy: ehhhh come si dice..il.... beershotcombo? 23 1,024 18.4K 824K](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/imageset/6/8/6/1113686.jpg)
![Cara @carawithac13 - 1d ... Can you explain the gap in your resume? Sure are you familiar with not getting jobs? 106 9,944 90.4K 1.6M](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/imageset/6/9/2/1113692.jpg)
![Neil Renic @NC_Renic 9h I'm researching! = downloading PDFs I'm writing! = googling synonyms 20 5,291 31.4K del 561K](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/imageset/6/8/2/1113682.jpg)
![miss V @piminxp 19h ... Weed hard as fuck coke never made me spend 42$ at the deli opal @unbreakopal2 2d me when my mutuals talk about doing any drug harder than weed GIF 50 1,526 29.1K 1.1M](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/imageset/6/8/7/1113687.jpg)
![Lego Shalashaska Kingo 20h ... liked the gladiator two trailer but i can't believe Ridley Scott would make a historical error this big: they didn't have cameras back then so it was impossible to make a movie about gladiators. Next time he should hire a real historian to consult with 15 944 15.9K 275K](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/imageset/6/8/9/1113689.jpg)
![staid @staidindoors • 1d ... it's time. joe biden's two husbands need to ask him to leave the race VP Biden (Archived) 8/1/16 Proud to marry Brian and Joe at my house. Couldn't be happier, two longtime White House staffers, two great guys. 10 1,176 27.2K 855K](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/imageset/6/8/5/1113685.jpg)
![mutha @Lu.... 1d ... Lucky Fuckin McGee You and me. Tomorrow. Poopdown at high noon. 1,771 10.3K 91.4K del 10.3M](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/imageset/6/8/8/1113688.jpg)
![Despachico @_CHICO.- 19h ... What if we kissed in the accordion part of the bus directional transsexual 21h the seats in the bendy part of the articulated cta buses are the most magical place in the universe ALT 5 913 11.1K 343K](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/imageset/6/8/3/1113683.jpg)
![Mike Drucker @MikeDrucker 15h ... They 100% knew what it was and wanted to hear their boss have to explain it as if he were walking through a minefield IGN @IGN 16h Marvel Studios president Kevin Feige helped bring Deadpool into the MCU, which apparently meant describing what pegging is to a few со- workers who weren't familiar with the term. bit.ly/3Wf9Kdc AN DIEGO SAN DIEGO SAN DIE SAN DIEGO CON CON C CON MULTIVERSE COMIC COMIC INTERNATIONAL. COMIC TIONAL. INTERNATIONAL INTERN DIEGO SAN DIEGO S SAN DIEGO SAN D MIC С CON CON CON OMIC 8 COMIC INTERM NATIONAL 18](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/imageset/6/8/1/1113681.jpg)
![Nat @unfortunatalie. 1d why are they called capybaras and not guinea bigs 67 3,937 47.2K 1.2M](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/imageset/6/8/4/1113684.jpg)
![dan molloy @danyomolloy 1d this is all i'm on reddit for r/Frasier_Sleepers Joined 2 online 5,239 members For those who love to fall asleep while watching the hit sitcom Frasier. See community info NEW POSTS u/Married_catlady 6d Too many episodes with Fire Alarms! 66 19 Share 2 2.2K 41K 1M](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/imageset/6/7/8/1113678.jpg)
![jayden @mensweear 1d ... idk ask her CARTIER. @CartiersSaint 1d CORATION ATION How tf u turn 0 ICANDLES AY HAPPY BIRTHDAY 0 24 24 4 117 1.9K 75K](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/imageset/6/7/6/1113676.jpg)
![dj franzia @hawillisdc. . 1d i miss when AI stood for allen iverson 117 16K 46K 1.3M](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/imageset/6/7/3/1113673.jpg)
![lily / lesbian girl mac @gonenighttiming . dd charlie kelly would cry to these + 35.6K ... 1,862 6,343 6,461 spanakorizo 6-22 520 214K 10 11K](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/imageset/6/7/4/1113674.jpg)
![Cross-laminated Tinder @nickhasthoughts - 1d this would kill a thousand american drivers in a week Abandoned World Follow ... X 4 days ago In just a few days, Japan built a new bridge to replace the old road while it is being fixed. Only in Japan! 3.3K 616 comments 384 shares 896 34K 240 762K](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/imageset/6/6/9/1113669.jpg)
![libby @sinnedsystem 1d ... YTH ES female dennis reynolds @FLVESTARWOMAN . 2d ever since i was a little girl i knew i wanted to have a gay husband 2 292 7K 142K](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/imageset/6/7/2/1113672.jpg)
![nicole boyce @nicolewboyce 12h ... oh god. Biden just confused Friends with Benefits (2011) with No Strings Attached (2011) Friends With Benefits JULY 2011 IOSIRINGSAI IACHED Smart and Sexy - Karen Durbin, ELLE Facebook.com/Friends 56 2.1K 46K 1.4M](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/imageset/6/7/5/1113675.jpg)
![Turner Novak @TurnerNovak 2d just found the consultant who did McKinsey's $4 million NYC garbage can study 43 1.2K 15K 561K](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/imageset/6/7/1/1113671.jpg)
![K @k_ramb0. 5h ... Working from home is really great. 10 minutes ago I was on a call discussing deliverables and stakeholder engagement and now I'm frying plantain 64 3.2K 16K 426K](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/imageset/6/7/0/1113670.jpg)
![@_BlowMyJoe 1d Support Fem Tops! Our granddad died today and my sister gone text me this shit 6:59 69 Latin Rice Q E W R T Y I U o P A S D F G H J к L Today 5:32 PM Ima make some brownies Delivered Today 6:58 PM Phone not charging Everything's just dying today 283 3.7K 81K 1.3M](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/imageset/6/7/7/1113677.jpg)