32 of the Funniest Tweets from Tuesday, July 2, 2024

At ease, soldier
32 of the Funniest Tweets from Tuesday, July 2, 2024

Looks like someone said “Beetlejuice” a few too many times over in Italy. 

Tim Burton’s highly anticipated Beetlejuice Beetlejuice will make its world premiere at the 81st Venice International Film Festival this August, setting the stage for alums Michael Keaton, Winona Ryder and Catherine O’Hara to reunite at one of the flashiest gatherings in entertainment. The original trio will be joined by newcomers Jenna Ortega, Monica Bellucci, Willem Dafoe and Justin Theroux in a movie that features “a surprising swing of creative imagination and driving hallucinatory rhythm,” according to festival artistic director Alberto Barbera.

Meanwhile, a new Zac Efron costar has him recalling another from his past. The Family Affair actor told Entertainment Weekly that Joey King’s physical comedy while filming the Netflix romcom reminded him of Matthew Perry. Or as Efron said of one stunt in particular, “That was one of the most brilliant comedy bits I’ve seen in a long time. Matthew Perry-esque. It was genius.” 

Of course, Efron has firsthand knowledge of Perry’s genius, having worked with the late Friends legend in 2009’s 17 Again.

Over on the timeline, the comedic timing is pitch-perfect per usual. Today’s funniest tweets include those about a burning Inside Out pitch, the spilt drink worth crying over and the baseball player who should probably stick to the mound.

Ghost Burro Bangs @yuckyban... 1d ... you'll burn in hell for this richie owens @iamRichieO... . 1d Times that we wished Homer would cheat on Marge and divorce her A thread: 12 1,553 32.1K 647K
Comrade Sisko @Pink... 23h ... We did'nt do anything, Joe 29 5,062 45.6K 994K
snoopy fans brazil @slowmali.1 1d that fly will testify against you on judgement day @Noxeykit•1 1d GET ON MY FOOD AGAIN I DARE YOU 117 9,321 113K 3.2M
k @bluehoodiebaby- 19h ... ... @ooeygooeychewy We need a slur for We need to beat you with a bat 19:29 10 Oct 23 1,552 Views P*vel @arthoefootjob - 3 3d The english language needs a more devastating slur for homeless people 39 9,785 87.6K 1.3M
yash @dildoswagginzs• 7h the best thing about being alive is that sometimes there is a cat 34 5,727 20.1K 372K
Karen Huger's CVS Shoes @spi... 1h ... No one: Absolutely zero people: Gay guy with abs in a speedo: dad bod brought to you by burgers 11 114 1,846 44.7K
Adso Of Belk @AdsoOfBelk. 1d ... Bruh if you buy this they should kill you Save 55% 50 Roses $1.49 each Get 50 for $74.99 91 1,257 41.5K 2.3M
The Raven @Nick_Cerveza 23h ... me: PERMISSION TO USE LETHAL FORCE SIR! my boss: no me: SIR YES SIR! (turning back toward customer) have a Great day! 13 3,299 38.7K 806K
Ovrkast. @ovrkast. 1d ... yall ever meet a mediocre narcissist? Like the person is trash as fuck at what they do but have the biggest ego Imfao 122 809 4,024 del 171K
islay // misty SOON AnthroCon @s.... 1d ... Staring at this rubberband like a sheltered elderly woman whose morning toast looks a bit too much like Jesus ASTER KOHLER 83 6,370 75.8K 778K
bran @lilbran33 . . 1d next inside out movie riley gotta get high i wanna see if the emotions gon tweak 235 4.1K 40K del 965K
Blu @bluemupp 18h ... damn she bad asf D. @superaktivv • 3 3d i just spilled my drink and then... 222 11K 220K 4.6M
Raven Brunner @raventbrunner. 16h Me @ everybody in the comments There's not going to be another Barbenheimer ,you stupid slut. POP CRAVE Pop Crave @PopCrave.19h 'Wicked' and 'Gladiator II' will now be released on the same day in the US. LADIATO WICKED 52 63K 1.2M 4.3K
Sesame Chiccen @Loccdawggg. dd ... Together? druberry @druskiiiiiii - 1d this meatlovers pizza and grape jelly >>> 68 1.8K 16K 849K
normie @KellytoyDK . dd this feels like a norm macdonald bit @PopBase. 1d Pop Base O.J. Simpson was featured on the 'In Memoriam' segment at the #BETAwards. O.J. SIMPSON Former NFL Player BE I 20 847 376K 19K
Ben Joyce @benjoyce08 18h Upon further review this is not the Golden Gate Bridge. swilly @swillysports.1 19h oh sweetie that's not ben_joyce08 8m ... X GOLDEN GATE BRIDGE, SAN FRANCISCO 171 52K 1K 3.4M
Daniel Bogdanoff @DanielBogdanoff 1d ... The fun part of 3d printing overnight is that sometimes you didn't Bambu Lab P15 Bambu Lab 180 1.6K 39K 668K
this happened to my buddy eric @flowrmeadow. 1d ... Now kiss Sardine Con 5 57 1.3K . 30K
transpuppygirl @transpuppygirlz. 21h ... man I sure love this porridge surely the owner of this house won't show up and catch me Daddy bear 1 mins Hey 1 8 1.7K 15K 221K
Matt McElheron @MattMcElheron 19h interview panel waiting for you to stop so they can give it to the internal candidate 0:24 From ana clara 75 2K 32K 1.8M
Matt Fairlee @MatthewFairlee 1d ... Babe wake up new homophobic dog just dropped jackie @chimp_simp . 3d She's mad as hell MARY'S 134 KINGSLAND M AVE BKLYN NY BAR Queer Irish Pub For bookings email marysbarbk@gmail.com IG: @marysbar brooklyn 75 10.2K 160K 3.9M
timmygami eyes @deliclit.1 1d Credit card got stolen at the rave and they bought 400 dollars worth of drinks 93 2,456 90.1K 4.7M
101iight @101Iight 16h ... Congratulations you won all the Oscars Emma Stone: 2 59 1,635 33K
#1 @NaLyssaSmith 1d nah my knees look nuts bro = Indiana Fever @IndianaF... 1d a double-double day (12 PTS & 15 REB) for NaLyssa Smith in today's win Jour 22 Lee FEVER kT 1 force ANILES Wilson Phoenix 9 the UN 410 1,089 19.7K 907K
Super 70s Sports @Super70... 1d ... I miss the days when the news smacked so goddamn hard Peter Jennings had to fire up a heater just to deliver that shit. BICNEWS LONDON 381 2,281 24.1K 990K
Dan Baldassarre @evornithol... 16h ... My neighbor is like 80 years old Today 9:40 PM Just wanted to give you a heads up in case you happened to look out your back window later on. I'll be testing one of my firework effects, which creates a fireball. It's made with cremora coffee creamer, not gasoline, so it should be relatively safe. 27 94 1,802 25.9K
James Medlock @jdcmedlock-1d ... THE BURDEN OF WHAT HAS BEEN WHAT CAN BE mgflip.com 65 1,141 20.3K 1.2M
rayne fisher-quann @raynefq 1d ... whoever said this was initiating a 7DD psychological operation to end as many heterosexual relationships as possible gaia @gaialect 2d i forgot who said it first or who said it best but it's so true, how someone takes photos of you/captures your beauty and essence can speak volumes about how much love they... 28 1,714 34.5K 1.2M
cie @hugetulip . 22h gr and they really got their lick back cos my left over salmon and rice is nowhere to be found Imaooo GIF cie @hugetulip 6/22/24 gr Stealing my niece and nephews fruit snacks and juice >>> 31 1,123 20.5K 339K
Vinny Thomas @vinn_ayy 1d interweightcial Emma @scousepie 2d Mixed weight relationships I hate it here Forbes 'Bridgerton': Are We Still Not Ready For A Mixed-Weight Romance On Screen? Opinion 2 days ago Virgie Tovar You can reply to this conversation 132 11.8K 191K 7.1M
cold @coldhealing 1d ... hinge opener: you, me, 5pm tuesday, low dose of acid, at the target chuck e cheese uniqlo target CHUCKE.CHEESE 28 UNI QLO 9 PO Let 25 22 148 4,231 145K
Nathan Arizona @SPIDERCRA... 1d ... Oh fuck no..... WHAT? HOW DID YOU THINK I WASHED THE DISHES? offthemark.com ©2015 MarkParisi Mark Parisi Dist @aol by Universal UClick com 5-5 PARIS! MARK 6 100 1,906 del 91.4K


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