35 of the Funniest Tweets from Thursday, June 6, 2024

Put them in the MCU, you cowards
35 of the Funniest Tweets from Thursday, June 6, 2024

A double dose of news came out of Panem this morning. First, Scholastic announced that Suzanne Collins will be releasing a fifth novel in the Hunger Games series. Sunrise of the Reaping is due out next year and set at the Hunger Games that took place 24 years before the events of the OG trilogy. Shortly thereafter, Lionsgate then announced that an adaptation of the to-be-released novel is already in the works, which will set the stage for a young actor to do their best Woody Harrelson impression, as Haymitch Abernathy is sure to make an appearance.

Meanwhile, another writer explained when she chooses to ignore social media. During a conversation for VarietyQuinta Brunson told Jennifer Aniston that she had a strict “no social media” policy for the first season of Abbott Elementary. Brunson elaborated on the “jarring” nature of social media and explained to the Morning Show actress that she “doesn’t care what social media is asking (them) to do” because the writers know the characters best and will “do what (they) want to do.” 

To their credit, instead of flooding the timeline with Abbott Elementary pitches, these tweeters stuck to what they knew best — riffs, jokes and memes of their own. Today’s funniest tweets include those about the only time zone that matters, a couple of cool cows and a humbling Catholic reminder.

beer person @CantEverDie - 1 14h wow babe you're really good at staying up incredibly late and barely sleeping every night 252 9,490 72.6K del 1.8M
#MBC M M RUDY @thecasi... 16h ... They letting anybody be realtors these days. I wouldn't buy a gingerbread house from you bitches 343 5,250 19.5K 906K
Itzel @sufferingitzel. 1d Igbt (let's get birria tacos) 17 2,995 8,678 367K
The Kindly Cowpoke @sillyding... 1d ... i i do not want to save to onedrive. i i want to save to the documents folder. on my computer. that i have. in my house. 18 365 5,477 del 118K
down bad comments @down... 1d ... LMFAOOO Replied to your story come over i'll get u pregnant i have an iud damn so u want me to drive then? that's a dui.. 251 6,134 101K 6.4M
isabel pabán freed @_unwell 1h waiting for godot is so funny. like girl!! he's not coming 10 155 1,025 22.7K
Trey @treydayway 20h ... What if the Mayans were right and this is hell 92 192 1,278 36.1K
Rahm Bowen Fan Account @... 20h ... when ppl get strict and turn off their story replies I can't help but to wonder.. what was the final straw 128 3,362 29.2K del 937K
Timmy&Jimmy @mickeywo... 16h ... Everytime I'm home alone the house start acting funny CC 0:03 165 13.5K 68.1K 1.7M
rosey @thechosenberg. 22h Schism developing among short king factions r/shortguys u/makarwind03 . 1h Sick of 5'5+ guys complaining vent I'm aware that all short guys have struggles but as a 5'1 dude I'm kinda sick of all these 5'5+ guys and especially 5'7+ guys complaining like it's the end of the goddamn world. The average height for women is 5'4 so guys below that are literally shorter than the average woman. At least 5'5 guys are taller than the average woman. Men AND WOMEN both tower over me. My mom is taller than me for fucks sake. Image how it
rock and roll photos @yesitsmy... 1d ... One of the most promising looking emails I've seen in years 9:41 80 Search in mail E III PRIMARY Maximus Tromp 9:32 AM Scythe #4157*82/. PDF KmCN2NemM.p... 12 734 17.9K 445K
allison @MtF_DOOM 22h used to be friends online with this girl who was gay but also scottish and she used to send me pictures of older women with messages like a want her tae kick ma heed in 3 474 3,073 56.7K
alex zawacki @AChillGhost1d ... Real ID is the most American thing that's ever happened. A Patriot Act-era requirement that has been delayed to next year, every year, for 20 years, because Americans simply cannot be bothered to get one 304 2,363 42.8K 2.2M
Granite Man @GraniteDhui... 9h ... Good morning, we're all adults here, it's important to remember that you can literally buy a cake whenever you want, and no one can stop you. 10 93 363 12.3K
ganii @gahhnie. 1d ... fucking hate my european oomfs. haha im just gonna take the train to go literally anywhere i want fuck yoy 234 11.4K 100K 2.2M
andy van slyke @im_all_id 12h Very rude that image quality improved exponentially as I became worse looking 7 131 633 18.1K
brynn @kinematografi - 2 23h when i was in highschool i found this book in a record store and i have had these sentences stuck in my head since 2. When Paul arrived at the koala habitat, he was greeted by a zoo keeper who asked, Wanna hold a koala? Paul smiled and nodded 'yes!' While holding the wonderful koala, it mysteriously hypnotized Paul and then dangerously licked Paul's eyes. When Paul woke up he could see heat like Predator. 10 192 2,863 44.9K
snoopy posters @snoomfies 19h ... I WISH I COULD BITE SOMEBODY... I NEED A RELEASE FROM MY INNER TENSIONS.. 2,405 12.2K 453K 27
G AY ت MEAT @gaymeatk... 20h ... in spring there is the WHITE COWS beach ... giusicasada Follow ... Pomplamoose Comment te dire adieu in spring there is the WHITE COWS beach ... 25 1,713 25.8K 588K
via @atrophicbtrfly- 1d ... i'm assembling a team 291 13K 103K 5.4M
juju $ @ayeejuju 12h how many times you gon tweet this S from:JoeBiden school teachers a rai... Top Latest People Photos Videos Joe Biden @JoeBiden• 6h Let's give public school teachers a raise. 15K 8.3K 46K del 4.8M Joe Biden @JoeBiden 4/29/23 Let's give public school teachers a raise. 16K 11K 70K del 10M Joe Biden @JoeBiden·2/13/23 Let's give public school teachers a raise. 13K 8.4K 69K del 8.5M Joe Biden @JoeBiden.1 19h Let's give public school teachers a raise. 909 7,985 140K 5.7M
Los Feliz Daycare @LosFeliz... 11h ... this is straight andy cohen and anderson cooper 14 216 5,473 198K
Orwell & Goode | $TREN @... . 22h ... ok grandma let's get you to bed Joe Rogan used to have hair and make people eat bugs for money 67 1,771 24.2K 1.1M
doomer @uncledoomer 14h doing this at every table at the flea market before leaving without buying anything 115 6,181 94.6K 3M
Ryan McEntush @rmcentush. 1d ... time for the training wheels to come off. they're ready for draftkings NEW YORK New York Post POST @nypost 1d Remote Amazon tribe connects to Elon Musk's Starlink internet, become hooked on porn, social media trib.al/wHDwEf9 STARLINK THE ARA 108 5,864 79.4K 6.2M
mr brightside appreciator @y... 17h ... sodiumfreak Follow it's always don't repeat the cycle and beware of the cycle and never How was the cycle was it fun to be in the cycle 7 772 6,198 124K
Ranch Devereaux @theJacko.20h ... 27 seasons and I couldn't even name a single contestant or winner if my life depended on it MR. POR Mr. Pop @MrPopOffi... 20h JUST IN: Season 27 of The Voice will have Adam Levine, John Legend, Michael Bublé and Kelsea Ballerini as coaches. MG AK E SIC V NGIN H 548 2,125 32.8K 2.5M
JULIA @SOUND0FMETAL.1d Googled Why am I ashamed to desire anything? and then remembered I was raised Catholic and closed the tab 17 2,318 15.4K 341K
Leo @NYWiseass 1d I definitely thought they switched the kidney out like a transmission. karissi. @KaRissiNykeia 1d a visual of what that looks like lol x.com/karissinykeia/... Kidney Transplant Nonworking kidney Transplanted kidney Ureter Bladder 70 4,871 16.5K 682K
matt @computer_gay 1d ... this prolly felt good af for a fraction of a second Today 10:45 AM matt 2 Greatest personal injury case I've ever heard: Chris Goodnow, an estimated Valley attorney, has picked up a client who is suing a sex toy company. Said client purchased a butt plug that was advertised as 100% silicone. Client wears butt plug to MRI appointment. Much to client's dismay, butt plug in fact has a metallic core. Butt plug is accelerated at the speed of sound ip into client's chest cavity. Described in memo as an anal rail gun. Client M
ash @xpinkspacex 21h USA TIME ZONE MAP CANADA REAL WA ND MT MN TIMEZONE CT OR MI ID SD PA NJ WY IA MD DE OH PACIFIC Washington, DJ MOUNTAIN IL NE 2:00 PM CENTRAL WV 3:00 PM VA 4:00 PM NV EASTERN UT KY со KS NC MO 5:00 PM CA TN SC AR OK ATLAN с A OCEA NM GA PA O MENTAL ILLNESS FL AK CANADA HAWAII ALEUTIAN HAN 12:00PM ALEUT 200 400 PAC PACIFIC Areas that do not Kometers OCEAN www.mapsofworld.co color S @colorscolorsr•2 2d Living on US Central Time is natural and healing. All other time
Old Bufomsti @_Old_Bukows....2 23h ... Indeed NO BIG SEXYY Gabe @melchizedek420.1d the main difference between white and black people is how they make finger guns 232 13.2K 150K 7.6M
Andrew Lawrence @ndrew_law... .1d ... an incredible time to be alive 8 WFLA NEWS @WFLA.1d 'It's time we put a felon in the White House,' sheriff says bit.ly/3wZ5UuX RIVER BIANCO 151 7,006 100K 2.7M
Ben Jenkins @bencjenkins. 9h You should be able to purchase a big swig of Sprite. 90% of the time that's all the Sprite you need. 40 cents seems fair. 14 32 839 21K
General Will @GamecockW... 15h ... Sorry fellas, can't go to the bar tonight POP CRAVE Pop Crave @PopCrave.1 19h The Weather app is down. 34 2,984 98.8K 4M


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