32 of the Funniest Tweets from Thursday, May 30, 2024

Stay strong, fellas
32 of the Funniest Tweets from Thursday, May 30, 2024

Despite speculation about Antony Starr joining the DC Universe, he isn’t feeding into the superhero frenzy. The actor, best known for his portrayal of Homelander in The Boys, told Comicbook.com that he has no interest in donning any other cape — including that of the titular character in James Gunn’s upcoming Booster Gold. In fact, his exact words were, “If there ain’t milk… I ain’t doing it, honey,” referencing an infamous scene from The Boys’ second season. That said, I’m sure fans will continue to believe that he’s bluffing until an official announcement is made. 

Moving from Earth to Eternia, Amazon MGM found its man with the power. Up-and-comer Nicholas Galitzine is set to wield the Power Sword as He-Man in the studio’s live-action Masters of the Universe adaptation. The Idea of You star will follow in Dolph Lundgren’s footsteps as the second actor to portray the mystical behemoth, while hoping to avoid the same critically panned fate of the 1987 film.

Things over on the timeline are just as super — super funny, that is. Today’s most hilarious tweets include those about a full-circle moment for a crotchety cat, Donald Trump’s aha moment and a response that isn’t technically wrong.

Robbie Fox @RobbieBarstool. 1d ... GO Beautiful artwork at Newark Airport LOBAL BAZBAR 16601 BURGERS PIZZA United Airlines is a Fuckia Joke DER HERE 2 - ORDER 935K 21K 892 46
777 @unfunyyab. dd That's y i love social media _srishittt 42m Ass me anything Your mother tongue? 518 20.2K 146K 4.1M
@katiebandz_.21h Are people okay? Where you from? I was placed here lol I'm not from here though Have a good day. Delivered I'm serious My body from here but my spirit isn't and that's wat carries me My spirit Do you understand? 439 3,711 31.4K 1.9M
pub deal campaign @blkyth 15h ... brother you are going to be giggling and she is going to reveal she is a sociopath Vic Damone Jr. @1mikeey_ 1d Doing shrooms wit a bad bitch is a experience i need 31 1,284 8,250 527K
@buffys 1d hi im rue! (they/them) @cliterella all y'all do is paint your nails and say this. do something different! get a BBL!! Aaron Piercer @aaron_piercer. 2d f*ck gender stereotypes Show this thread 67 5,571 94.6K 1.5M
asherah @e_asherah 21h ... do not let your white boyfriend watch the Bob Marley movie 3:51 5GUC 97 2 Ari> San Francisco, CA Today 10:14 AM Good morning one love X Oh no 9 202 9,917 del 296K
Jim McNulty @yellowpackjim - 1d ... It's called about to drive home after 10 pints Eoghan @EoghanHeriot.2d the 1971 photos of Irish government ministers have a certain aura i cant quite put my finger on 24 261 7,189 483K
brice x vitamin b queen @vitam... 1d ... I'm going to kill myself ME 12:30AM I like chubby guys LOVELEEN ME Oh I'm not chubby LOVELEEN ME 12:30AM Oh I'm not chubby It seems from these pictures LOVELEEN 2M 59.3K 1,763 177
Henderson @HendoSlice 16h My pet theory is that Larry David wrote Seinfeld with the subtext that Jerry is an awful comedian, and the funniest part is that real life Jerry acted in the role, used his real standup bits, and never caught on to the joke. 186 1,181 16.9K del 1M
Tyler @BalloonFlavour 23h ... Love that CNN has adopted the Dominos pizza tracker format for trial updates CNN Live TV III STATUS OF TRUMP'S FIRST CRIMINAL TRIAL WE ARE HERE 10 11 12 Sentencing (if guilty Jury deliberation Verdict verdict) Jury has been deliberating for 02h 41m 260 9,262 147K 4.6M
Michael Good @michaelgooood 18h ... every adult woman I know is reading like they're trying to qualify for a pizza party and every guy I know owes DraftKings $5000 94 5,850 64K 2.6M
Haydn, @bilbosfootcomb.20h ... Imagine being absolutely fucked on sedative and your dentist descends from the rafters like Dracula jackson @placed_onto.22h Cool dentist I saw climbing around his dentist office on instagram Normal dentists: *would grab a ladder* Dr Delaware: 35 4,575 67.5K 1.4M
rob @ok_but_still.1 15h ... when she wants to cum too 5 26 859 28.4K
brittle bones @flatgel 21h ... my girl is going to have a very merry christmas this year. i'm dipping 2 cans a day now. Ill 45 ZYN ZYN REWARDS POINTS STORES ACCOUNT CART CART SPRING COLLECTION NEW DYSON AIR WRAP 15,100 PTS QTY: Add to Cart 15,100 1 Step up your stylist game! From curling to smoothing to volumizing this award-winning hair tool delivers salon results right from home. 6 35 1,616 72.4K
Mowgli @fbgwayno 18h ... this cover told me everything i needed to know di NER NFR Podcast @nfr_pod....20h EMINEM-HOUDINI OFFICIAL COVER MAY 31ST EMNERTA GUESS WHO'S BACK? AND FOR MY LAST TRICK... E PARENTAL ADVISORY EXPLICIT CONTENT 217 1,174 30.5K 3M
Hanif Abdurraqib @NifMuha... . 12h ... incredible lede I cannot stop laughing at the real height in parentheses IN THIS REVIEW THERE'S ALWAYS THIS YEAR 352pp. Allen Lane. £20. Hanif Abdurraqib here's Always This Year must be the first T basketball memoir written by someone under 6ft. But Hanif Abdurraqib (5ft 7in) You can reply to this conversation 5 105 3,317 del 80.2K
@DanManCarn... 22h Dan Carney ... Lips Of An Angel themed karaoke bar where the only song people can sing is Lips Of An Angel by Hinder 99 2,612 17.7K 1.5M
Fiona Small @FionaSmall. 6h ... Obsessed with how this sketch from Trump's trial makes it look he is watching himself in A-Ha's 'Take On Me' video 1 127 1,999 65.7K
Smokey McPot @upperdeckyzyn-1d Bosh, back out to Allen Riley My greatest strength Blonde hair and blue eyes There was a leader in Germany from 1939-1945 who would agree 1 Send Like 24 263 13.8K 757K
eli @elijahmalecki.15h just woke up, what's the move 417 15.3K 133K del 2.5M
machine yearning engineer 17h M incredible that barcelona has a wario next door Sant Cugat del Vallès B-20 Badalona Parc Natural de Collserola Barcelona -23 C-31 87 3,701 83.4K 2M
Lattice @LatticeParable. 20h ... iknow this changed the entire trajectory of david lynch's life Alex Eccleston @Aven... 4/8/23 70 years ago today, a Sands Hotel dancer named Sally McCloskey climbed to the top of Mount Charleston in Nevada and performed an interpretive dance while an atomic bomb exploded behind her, just 40 miles away. 9 868 16.2K 625K
Ones Bitten Twice Shy @saba... 21h ... That last half hour of work 89 5,177 76.3K del 2.3M
yonk @Yonklerr 19h that crazy little bastard finally did it Stouffer's MEAT LOVERS LASAGNA DE with premium pepperoni, zesty Italian sausage and mozzarella cheese made with 100% FAMILY SIZE - - REAL I GET CHEESE - - - HOLA - / - - - - - I - - | MOVE - - - THE - GARFIELD - ace - I OMTO I MOVIE PER ICUP SERVING ABOUT - Theaters 360 . 17 220. D 780 tartar TOTAL PROTECT MODE - CALORIES MIN BLU 41/2 BILD MLN COOK rationo STOUFFER'S 13 242 2,749 106K
| Jamison Webb @jamisonwebb.21h the glass isn't to protect him from us...it's to protect us... from him... ... Mac Tonight M Happy - In 1986 Mac Tonight was introduced in the Los Angeles TV market by the McDonald's Operators of Southern and DBC Advertising, Не to aromote 33 475 4,439 163K
Papa Woof und Krampus un... 1d ... HOLY BIBLE Quickies 225 11K 106K 6.9M
YardieBarbie @dumbfe... . 16h ... my cousin called me to ask me how to make shrimp scampi pasta. i'm like you need white wine. she's like i don't have wine but i i think im gonna use casamigos i just hung up the phone 141 2,012 20.4K 637K
mijita @mijitta 1d ... this W a blunt and my homegirls could heal me andi sucirta 71 4,170 28.1K 847K
@darealtif-15h I promised my 7th period pizza and the ion got no money so ima just not go to work tomorrow. 404 1,446 23.2K del 715K
yolk @yolko@no.4h ... reading a book in public but being on page 5 is so embarassing 11 84 2,165 30.8K
No Context Brits @NoCont... 17h ... r/NoStupidQuestions Is British food really that bad? astralnautical If made correctly; yes. 125 2,046 35.8K 1.6M
Michael Good @michaelgooood 18h ... every adult woman I know is reading like they're trying to qualify for a pizza party and every guy I know owes DraftKings $5000 94 5,850 64K 2.6M


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