31 of the Funniest Tweets from Thursday, May 23, 2024

The latest installment of Deadpool is on pace to slice up the competition. AMC Theatres CEO Adam Aron tweeted out that upwards of “200,000 movie fans have bought their AMC tickets already” and said that it sold more opening-day tickets at AMC “than any other R-rated movie ever.” Similarly, online ticketing service Fandango announced that Deadpool & Wolverine broke its first-day ticket sales record for the year. Neither company gave actual monetary figures, but data nerds estimated presales being within the $8 million to $9 million range and box-office experts expect the movie to easily sail to a $100 million debut.

Speaking of foul mouths, Michael Richards insists that he’s not a racist. After making a rare public appearance at the Hollywood premiere of Unfrosted, the Seinfeld actor is back out there promoting his new memoir Entrances and Exits. The Emmy-winning comedian told People Magazine that he’s “not looking for a comeback” and that he’s spent the nearly two decades since he tanked his career by screaming the N word at a heckler during a stand-up set at the Laugh Factory doing “deep analysis” on himself to figure out what made him hurl such awful slurs.

Meanwhile, the comedians on the timeline are on their best behavior, and the output is glorious. Today’s funniest tweets include those about the difference between a show and a concert, what $6 gets you at Five Guys and an incredibly accurate Subway meme.