24 of the Funniest Tweets from Tuesday, May 7, 2024

You need to land a zinger, dude
24 of the Funniest Tweets from Tuesday, May 7, 2024

We’ve got the need for speed — Speed 3 that is. Keanu Reeves and Sandra Bullock made a joint appearance on the 50 MPH podcast to celebrate the 30th anniversary of Jan de Bont’s high-octane thriller Speed and had some hopeful words for those looking for another installment in the series. While Reeves opted not to return for 1997’s Speed 2: Cruise Control, the John Wick actor made it clear that he and Bullock would “freakin’ knock it out of the park” if given the opportunity to reunite. Bullock echoed Reeves’ acknowledgement of their chemistry saying, “There’s no formula. It just is.” She then made the following plea: “Before I die, before I leave this planet, I do think that Keanu and I need to do something in front of the camera.” If fans are lucky, that “something” will in fact be Speed 3

In other reunion-related news, William Shatner revealed that he would consider initiating warp drive once more under the right conditions. The legendary actor told the Canadian Press that a return to the USS Enterprise is an “intriguing idea,” but signing on for a future film would be contingent on “a genuine reason for the character appearing” with a “well-written” role and not just a nostalgia-fueled cameo appearance for fan service.

As Hollywood A-Listers reflect on some career defining highlights of their past, the timeline’s A-Listers continue to live in the moment with hysterical tweets that just might jumpstart a career in comedy. Today’s funniest include those about a serial puker, something along the lines of what Macbeth once said and a cheeky new COVID variant.

janito @yassnito 4h ... me when i grab the mii espresso by its head on the mii channel 172 3.7K 72K 4
Andrew Strauss @straussanator - 3h i contract this after one vodka soda VIRAL TAKES Viral Takes @viraltakes. 1d A new corona virus variant called FLiRT is reportedly on rise in the US. 85 1K 52K
staid @staidindoors.4h wonder if all the stories over the years about an audience member vomiting during an early horror screening are all about one guy and he just does that FILM UPDATES Film Updates @FilmUpdates 21h Audience reacting to a kill from 'IN A VIOLENT NATURE' during the Chicago Critics Film Fest screening of the film. An audience member also vomited during the screening. The film, described as a slasher from the killer's perspective, hits theaters on May 31. IN A VIOLENT NATURE A FILM BY CHRIS NASH sundance 0:45 70 811 16K 640K
@Versafunk.8h j*sh o'c*nnor propagandist @SPLENDOR1... 23h the aww thanks and the crossed hands:') 0:04 24 1.2K 18K 576K
Cease N' Desist @DammmnCam .20h The dominant species in a million years gone be digging up our fossils like where's the feet? tylaronae @tylaronae 1d y'all be eating strawberries with sugar? or just me?? If not try it rn. FEEP SSIP So 3D TRUST 1.2K 4.5K 18 200K
hoe wrangler @rats4friends 18h ... oh Today 7:01 PM i i appreciate you so much maybe im out of it as fuck and i be smokin weed but ur so nic e to me u get me... Delivered girl it's called being friends 12 108 2,335 82.3K
akemi homura, fallen from gr... . 19h ... smoking on that shit that makes you plural. smoking that we'd 12 1,716 10.2K del 191K
Alistair Baldwin @BaldwinAlis... 18h ... me trying to quote Macbeth: POP CRAVE Pop Crave @PopCrave. 19h Ariana Grande says something 'Wicked' related is coming soon. 9 886 15.1K 764K
dom @irldom 22h she'll do anything to stay relevant it's kinda sad VIRAL TAKES Viral Takes @viraltakes. 1d A new corona virus variant called FLiRT is reportedly on rise in the US. 13 1,408 16.6K 582K
Milky Way Ghetto Citizen SOON ... 21h ... MARIO PRINCESS PEACH LUIGI CHALLENGERS 12 654 6,987 del 214K
ethan @ethanjuiced 3h ... ran out of hinge likes before 10 am today. i need to be shot and killed in a public square 11 44 897 23.1K
@feni... 1d ... cunty michael collins If they banged their heads together it would cause a nuclear blast decimating everything in a 50mile radius 15 333 3,154 69.2K
cats with powerful auras @ca... 16h ... Who stole her boots 57 3,580 41.1K 1.5M
Dan Ozzi @danozzi 46m ... just realized bill maher dresses exactly like liz lemon's dad when he's trying to cheat on his wife 2000 00 2 tbs CAESAR aol.co ВО PALAC LAE VEGA COMI MIC ELIE 2 2000 CAESARS tbs PALACE gettyimages Credit: Jeff Kravitz MI RID 2 2006 AASARS 5 150 1,564 29.6K
Wendell @RhodeToLove 6h Troye heard bottoms reunion and joined in FILM UPORTES Film Updates @FilmUpd... 6h Ayo Edebiri, Nicholas Galitzine, Kaia Gerber, Troye Sivan and Rachel Sennott at the 2024 #MetGala 46 2,737 48.3K 1.2M
joe bro @jbromovies 18h I need to get my life together Today 5:12PM Ummm we are probs going into hospital tonight. Damn So no overwatch Delivered joe bro @jbromovies. 6/19/22 Cousin had a baby For e 8 28 1,983 50.5K
thot catalog @trekpup 4h Had a really nice time this past weekend with my husband, my husband's boyfriend, and my boyfriend's husband's boyfriend celebrating the marriage of my boyfriend and their husband 23 111 1,463 du 100K
@cryst6l.20h how life feels when ur having remember when conversations W friends GIF ALT 37 7,182 47.6K 740K
@buffys . 14h Replied to your story lear queen wait they're nonbinary monarch 100 3,713 48.3K 976K
dr. bitch @borzoilover47.23h enemies to lovers pipeline but it's my relationship with myself 6 2,048 7,622 132K
kingseeker peter frampton 16h ... aubrey drake graham and kendrick lamar duckworth sound like two 19th century explorers who both died in a race to the south pole 27 885 9,145 320K
gale na @poisonjr 14h  You're almost out of the friend group 19 822 10.7K del 333K
ELLA MACHINA @orchidcamp 16h ... just ate a bunch of chips. Again. will it ever fucking end 5 270 1,723 38.1K
Jamie Pierce @ajamiepierce 19h You're welcome to buy a ticket Lear COM V Variety @Variety 19h James Corden says he'd like to come to Broadway next year. bit.ly/ 4a8KkS4 VARIST VARIETY x 15 1,163 46.1K . 1.3M


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