30 of the Funniest Tweets from Wednesday, May 1, 2024

Everybody needs a hamfisted friend
30 of the Funniest Tweets from Wednesday, May 1, 2024

Even superheroes get the blues. 

Chris Hemsworth put down the hammer and led with his heart during a new profile in Vanity Fair. The Australian actor best known for putting on “the wig, the muscles and the costume” to portray Thor in the Marvel Cinematic Universe reflected on his time in the role — particularly the self-described “unforgivable” installment Love and Thunder. Hemsworth told the magazine that he “got caught up in the improv and the wackiness,” resulting in what he described as a “parody” of himself. Others came to Hemsworth’s defense, including Marvel mainstay Robert Downey Jr., who called Hemsworth a “formidable hat trick,” while fellow Aussie Cate Blanchett praised Hemsworth’s natural prowess. But before Hemsworth hangs up the mjölnir for good to pursue working with prolific directors like Greta Gerwig and Martin Scorsese, he thinks he owes the audience one more Thor movie to re-prove himself.

Unlike Hemsworth, another A-lister is embracing the goofiness. After Ryan Gosling hit the Fall Guy red carpet in the traditional premiere garb expected of Hollywood stars, he returned with an outfit change and a friend in tow. The Barbie star and Saturday Night Live’s Mikey Day reprised their depictions of Beavis and Butt-Head from a recent viral SNL sketch that’s garnered more than 13 million views online. Here’s hoping the dry wigs and facial prosthetics stay in the closet moving forward so SNL’s hottest moment in years doesn’t lose its charm.

Meanwhile, there’s no question that things on the timeline remain silly and goofy. Today’s funniest tweets include those about the hypnotizing power of a phrase like “dessert soups,” a Cybertruck wrapped like a deli sandwich and the most stunning corndog you’ll ever see.

Richard Richie Loco Nev... 15h ... Nobody: Cynthia from Rugrats: 129 5,318 42.8K 807K
Dividend Hero @HeroDivid... 16h ... Get rich then get off the grid Linkedin edition Experience Goose farmer Self-employed Jul 2023 - Present 10 mos On-site Microsoft 22 yrs 4 mos Principal Performance Architect Full-time Jul 2022 - Jul 2023 1 yr 1 mo Chehalis, Washington, United States Principal Software Development Engineer Apr 2001 - Jul 2022 . 21 yrs 4 mos Redmond,WA Azure Performance Team, August 2017 - Present Office 365 Foundation Engineering... see more 135 64.8K . 2.7M 5,594
Sopranos World @SopranosW... 15h ... Tone, we're making a killing at Dave & Busters tonight. There's a kid down here who's must be the Wayne fuckin' Gretzky of air hockey, this prick don't lose, T. I've been gettin' action on his games all night, it's a sure fuckin' thing hehehe WIN! - Dexerto @Dexerto 22h Dave & Busters plans to allow players 18 year DAVE& BUSTER'S and older to gamble on arcade games 26 2,326 20.2K 1.6M
... @Locwitt... 22h KNIPKEN BOST ATTISH GNINHEDS T. Garielle Co I Swe Girl it's not that deep but ok eese's eesés 12s Reese's K KitKa KitKat m m 1.1M 48.6K 2,352 454
Stone Cold Jane Austen @Ab... . 16h ... I wouldn't tell anyone I'd won the lottery, but there would be signs... 49 1,546 19.8K 728K
wheel @tweetsofwill.18h PRIME ROOTS Cold Cuts lora Hot Planet caitlin @hello_caitlin1d Has anyone else in Portland seen that cybertruck wrapped in photos of deli meat or am I hallucinating 59 2,245 31K 1.2M
Mary @AnniemuMary 13h Coworker casually threw into conversation dessert soups and everyone kept talking but I didn't hear another word. 73 336 8,711 269K
Coq áu Vin '82 @CAV_82.20h Awesome marathon costume экскурсия ноч ILL KM - - KM I - - name 341 JUNCAS - - - 870 полюс KM 49 152 1,922 37.1K
UwUTangClan @Executivejeff1-15h ... at long last, hamethyst ... Crystals Listed about a day ago in Brisbane, QLD 81 6,527 65.5K 1.3M
A Thick Legend @IAmShannon... . 1 1d ... We got LAZZZYYY AND CRAZZYYYYY, BIZZZZZZYYYYY IN THE HOUSE, WIIIIIIIIIISH IS IN THE HOUSE. Qadi @BigQadi 1d Gun pointed at your head, name a type of bone. 77 4,494 18.5K 744K
ISH @ImaStayHumble 1d ... fuck u went to Dunkin Donuts Academy? fuck no we ain't have dat shit michaela pratt @im_ayanna 2d wait.. yalls high schools didn't sell iced coffee in the mornings?? 418 6,213 48.3K 2.1M
Alamo Drafthouse @alamo....22h ... A #Challengers andrew @andrew12la.1 1d alamo drafthouse's preshows remain unmatched 6 503 10.3K 466K
Mira Gonzalez @miragonz.14h justin beber 5:39 X G Grandpa > Yesterday 4:37 PM I am worried about Justin Beber. Today 5:39 PM There is so much heartbreak in Justin's life. 50 1,373 28.2K 627K
MARK MORAN TM @itsmark... 1d ... Traditional family values pov: collecting all my husbands zyn cans and entering them on zyn rewards so i can get cool stuff ZIN . T 250 1 ZYN my NAZ Zve E 3 3 ZYN 6 ZYN B NAZ ٤ 64 616 19.3K dJ 1M
F CK EMBIID @JCMacriNBA 2h ... If anyone needs a little levity today, here's an actual text exchange between me and my wife just now: Are you ok? I'm sorry it was such a bad loss Yeah. No. Lol. It's sports. I'll survive I hope so. You looked so sad today. Like someone shot your dog I had a dog. Someone shot it. This is worse. Delivered LOL OMG I totally forgot about that I'm sorry baby 62 149 2,506 151K
CurtiMagurtti @__Curtdoggg·1 1d Girl that shit looks like a church on wheels h @easterngoblin•1 1d Get your money up 172 1,676 21.2K 679K
Crybaby Zay @crybabyzay 1d Can't mute jojo siwa cause I'm pretty sure she's gonna k*II someone one day and I gotta be there for that 52 3,570 48.6K du 1.2M
my wheelhouse @mywheelhou... .1d ... < X Replies @TheMrdangles16 9y ago T : hate the water temple... too confusing :( @KeithHalsell 4 days ago ... it's been 9 years, i hope you are doing great in life now @TheMrdangles16 2 days ago T it couldn't be going worse Keith 35 7,194 69.3K 960K
John Frankensteiner @JFrank... 15h ... New incredible John Carpenter quote just dropped How do you feel about getting older? What's that experience been like for you? How old are you? I'm 36. I'm pretty young. You're a child. That pisses me off. Larry Fitzmaurice @lfitzm... 23h Latest newsletter is an interview with the legend John Carpenter on his new album, buying gifts for people, therapy, basketball, Diablo IV, Maes... 20 1,905 13.1K 624K
abby jones @abbyfjones_ 13h thinking about the best opening line i ever received on dating apps YOU MATCHED WITH BRANDON ON 12/14/22 Are u a thom yorke and Johnny greenwood collab cause the SMILE Shit sorry I accidentally pressed send 7 17 653 39.4K
Dr Philip Lee @drphiliplee1. 1d ... I would have thought it's falling over in an ice skating rink, and someone skating over your outstretched fingers cutting them all clean off. Lazzyyyyyy @em_Lazzy 3d Every woman's biggest nightmare is late marriage. 420 2,233 40.1K 1.8M
Rothmus @Rothmus 17h Can someone honestly tell me what is stopping us from filling all this ocean with land and expanding the size of America? Ottawa MI VT Toronto NH London Detroit NY Boston MA ст PA OH New York ianapolis Philadelphia MD wv Washington VA NC Charlotte Atlanta SC GA LANDR bandit ... @bandit_some Find a school bus in the morning and just get on it. 210 1,907 75.6K 1.3M
Avi @avighnash 15h Linkedin cannot be real ... x Bryan Shankman Following Owner @ SuperSeller Get meetings with qualifie... Book an appointment 31m proposed to my girlfriend this weekend. Here's what it taught me about B2B sales: ...see more 217 8,694 97.2K 2.6M
ali golub @alibrooke4ever.2 20h ... Biden team pulling the emergency lever AP The Associated Press 22h BREAKING: In a historic shift, the U.S. moves to reclassify marijuana as a less dangerous drug, AP sources say. apnews.com/article/mariju... 219 6,461 58.4K 2.1M
Martin Pilgrim @MartinPilgrim1 1d I listen to a lot of white noise, so I get really excited when it rains or someone turns on a fan. It's like seeing my favourite band live. 37 2,807 33K 936K
feral goblin @michaelacoletta 11h ... MESSAGES now Fake ID guy You still owe me $400 for that last ID. The one where it says your 7 years old MESSAGES now Primary Care physician Yep. 1000th percentile. for height for your age. 2 672 16K 317K
a little peanut @youwould... 21h ... the Letterboxd in this guy's head must have gone so hard Jeremy Herbert @DDayFiL... 22h shout-out to this guy on the news calling Batman '89 corny in a Halloween 4: The Return of Michael Myers shirt ALLOWEEN & OF Monan Meres 8 751 17.8K 689K
Damion Schubert - @ZenOfDe... 1d ... Me, reading a @dieworkwear thread while wiping cheetoh dust off on my t- shirt and pajamas with holes in it: Fuck him up, Derek. derek guy @dieworkwear.1 1d Let me show you something. 21 847 14.1K 336K
dj zaftig @divergen....2 22h ... Is someone trying to trap me? Gays Eating Garlic Bread in the Park May 13th, 2024 from Park 3-10pm Meridian BYOGB (206) 580-3697 208 5,597 54.5K 1.1M
DonutHawk @StruggleDisplay.1 1d ... My 10 y/o son has a lot of friends who show up on our doorstep but by far my most fave lil dude has got to be the one who always appears holdin a fistful of ham 28 410 18.8K 323K


Scroll down for the next article
Forgot Password?