33 of the Funniest Reasons People Got Fired on Their First Day on the Job

Stuck his hand in the fryer on a dare
33 of the Funniest Reasons People Got Fired on Their First Day on the Job

You almost have to admire a guy who is so lacking in professionalism that he starts scoping out customers for weed on his first day at the job. But the best part of the story is when the dude explains his stoner’s intuition, suggesting that even though he didn’t know for sure that the customer had weed, he just asked because “he looked like he would.” Unfortunately, his stoner tingles were wrong, and he ended up getting fired. 

Other managers have recalled the funniest reasons they had to let someone go on their first day, and this one goes out to the guy who refused to wear a uniform and showed up in a South Park T-shirt instead.

Log-jammer 8y ago My old manager (matron at a psychiatric secure hospital) told me of a guy who was employed as a healthcare assistant, working with people with a learning disability. Part of his role involved escorting patients into the community to help them with shopping. Не took his first charge to a shopping centre and proceeded to spend £250 on their debit card buying electronic goods for himself...which he then brought back to the hospital and asked for them to be stored in the staff room until the end of his shift. Не left with the police. 3.4K Share
demonicsoap 8y ago I worked at an upscale cocktail lounge as a bar tender. One day my boss hired this new guy to work behind the bar with us, it was rush and the bar was packed and we were all running around. Then this new guy comes up to the sink behind the bar, kneels down, puts his hair under the running faucet and then flings his head back leaving a splatter on the wall behind him, he then proceeds to smooth his hair down... at rush... in front of customers... ... Не didn't stay long. 1.9K Share ...
sackofmangoes . 8y ago Не asked my boss out. She said she's married. Не then asked her if she's up for casual sex. Share 1.9K ...
the_mighty_moon_worm 8y ago Hired a girl to fire watch, which is where you literally sit still and make sure nothing sets fire while someone welds. Easiest job in the world. How do you fuck it up? This girl gets five minutes into her first job, lays down on the ground, and goes to sleep. Not like she dozed off, she rolled up her jacket as a pillow and everything. On the ground. In the dirt. In the middle of our mill. 620 Share ...
Graphitetshirt 8y ago Не tried to buy weed off a customer just because the customer looked like someone who might have weed. Не didn't. 20K Share ...
bobmystery 8y ago My chef hired a guy who was less than a week out of prison for dealing. Не was just going to wash dishes. Seemed like an ok guy, just looking for some work because he had just done 5+ years. So, day one, he goes to head chef and asks, Hey man, you know anybody here who wants to buy heroin? Out the door 2 hours into his first job out of the joint. 11K Share ...
12пр 8y ago I work for a company that takes care of the HR needs of other small companies in my area. New hires often come in to fill out paperwork. We had this guy who came in, filled out his name and social security number, gave it to us, then proceeded to steal the front desk guy's wallet and keys. Right in front of the very visible security camera. Turns out the police knew the guy as we was a repeat offender. Не lived right around the corner. 8K Share ...
SuperJSledge . 8y ago Caught him snorting some kind of pill. Не probably could have gotten away with it, if he wasn't doing it in my office. Share 5.5K ...
 g 8y ago Did a Tarzan swing on a overhead hoist remote cable going some 20 feet before the cable tore out. It only took maintenance 20 minutes to fix, but he was gone by then. 7.8K Share ...
 . 8y ago . Edited 8y ago I got to fire my co-managers sister who called 5 minutes before her first shift and said she'd be there in an hour because she just sat down to dinner with friends.
ruudeboy 8y ago Kid stuck his hand in the fryer after being dared to. After being rushed to the hospital, I knew he was too much of a liability and I had to let him go. Share 192 ...
 e 8y ago . Edited 8y ago I'm not a manager, but I had a potential co-worker who called in sick. I guess he didn't know that the manager didn't have to work through the evening and bumped into him at the movies. My boss told us this as he fired him the next day. 3.9K Share ...
FightTheWindmills 8y ago Work at a used record store. While giving the guy the tour he mentions how we underbelly our LPS and let's us know he's just going to use his employee discount to re sell all the good stuff that comes in in our eBay Store. Не lasted about an hour. 2.5K Share ...
PlanetaryGenocide 8y ago So I'm not a manager or employer, but I do get copied on all the termination notice emails for the retail locations our company has (for some reason). For terms on the first day, there's a bunch of the expected didn't show up for training, got a different job, extremely late to training, etc. There was also fistfight with customer, drug use, violation of company policy (dude tried to steal merchandise), and arrested (though for what, I don't know). There's probably some other great ones but none that come to mind at the moment. 2.6K Share ...
BookerDeWittsC... 8y ago 0 Edited 8y ago I managed a bookstore that had an auxiliary calendar kiosk at the other end of the shopping center. Hired a woman to man it, did her morning training, left her alone for a bit. Went back to check on her and found half the calendars stolen and her asleep behind the curtains we used to hide back stock. I've never been so angry.
mississauga145 8y ago Went to retrieve the new hire in the cafeteria, asked them to follow me out to the work area. Starting walking towards the door. They start to follow, then see someone they know sitting on the other side of the room. They walk away from me and proceed to have a conversation for 5 minutes. When they were done they came back to me and said they were ready to go. I thanked them for coming in, and showed them the door. 1.1K Share ...
StraightouttaDR 8y ago Worked retail management. On black Friday we had a new guy and his one job was to greet customers. Literally Hi welcome to Two older ladies walked in and he says what the fuck is uuuupppp. I told him your time working here. I clocked him out remotely and told him to enjoy his family, because he wouldn't be shopping with the $4 he made working that half hour. 3.3K Share ...
Shodan30 8y ago I worked at a drugstore.. They hired some girl and on her first day behind the counter alone she spent 20 minutes scratching unpurchased lotto tickets and throwing away any losers until the manager saw what she was doing on the security camera and booted her. 1.9K Share ...
 4y ago Hired a guy on the recommendation of another employee. Не no-call no-showed the first day. Second day he no-call no- showed, but halfway through the day called to tell me that his kid was sick (which I'm sympathetic for because I have kids too), but I had to tell him we couldn't use him. Then waves of abusive texts and phone messages from him and his wife. His final text was super-long and explained how I'd just made it an enemy for life and that he was going to get even by starting up a rival business
BADMANvegeta_ 4y ago . Edited 4y ago Guy lied about knowing how to drive forklift. Drove into support beam.
Owlmoose 4y ago - Edited 4y ago Girl snorted in disgust when I asked her to clear a table in her section. Wouldn't be shown how to set a table, and snapped at another manager. Do you even want to be here? I asked. Not really. OK, grab your stuff, good luck to you. 13K Share ...
sonia72quebec . 4y ago She just left, I couldn't find her anywhere. Called her later at her parent's home and fired her. Mom was pissed... at me. Share 17K ...
storm_queen - 4y ago I know my application said I can work any time but really I can't work nights and weekends. She was hired for nights and weekends. 3.4K Share ...
4y ago mangoscape My boss hired a new lab technician, I am the manager so he had to report to me. At the end of the shift he tried to clean medical equipment with dish soap.. Cuz he didn't want to wait for the machine to finish. Which the other crew would be responsible for.. Не tried to microwave blood.. In a microwave for food.. And last but not least he forgot to put someone in the freezer. For five hours. Не was such a mess Share 6.5K ...
ButtChunkNugget в 4y ago Showed up 45 minutes late and said he lost his uniform then he revealed he planned on wearing his worn out South Park t-shirt and shorts. 234 Share ...
 4y ago The guy signed a non disclosure as we were working around movie sets and production offices. Throughout the day he continuously asked if he could take photographs. Finally, I realized that his employment was not worth risking my own employment or the production companies information. Не was relocated elsewhere but, he did not last long from what I hear. 6.4K Share ...
bebelmatman 4y ago Edited 4y ago Customer service desk at an insurance company. Basically just rerouting incoming calls to the relevant claims handler. 18(ish)yo lad comes from a temp agency. Seemed a bit dippy but should have been able to manage this easy job. After a couple of hours he'd secured his headset to his head by wrapping sellotape around his head and face several times. Weird but...ok. Checked on him again 15 minutes later and he'd also sellotaped his telephone handset (each workstation had both) to his head in the same manner. Not only that but he'd sellotaped his
 8y ago Не showed a relatively flat chested girl in the office the results of his wife's breast augmentation on his phone and gave her the contact details of the plastic surgeon. 864 Share ...
bazilbt 8y ago Wasn't a manager but we had a kid who came into the shop and his first day of night shift they couldn't find him. Well they found him after a few hours. Не cleaned off a shelf in the parts room and was sleeping on it. Share 964 ...
_Terrapin_ 8y ago 40 something year old woman came in smelling of alcohol in a toys store for her first day as a seasonal employee. She threw up on herself in between helping customers. Share 1.1K ...
 4y ago Loooong story short, as a manager for Space Shuttle Atlantis post Columbia, had a new hire that violated safety rules 3 times in his first morning, then broke another rule after lunch about tool securing and dropped a wrench 150 feet onto Atlantis resulting in 3.3 million in time/scans/materials to recertify the impacted area for flight. 1.8K Share ...
 4y ago The dude who showed up in pants so tight you could see his entire dick and balls. It was a children's bounce play area/fun zone. We told him to go home and change....he came back over an hour later, with Starbucks, in blindingly white skinny jeans...same issue. Parents complained the first time. Share 12K ...
gibbl011 4y ago Edited 4y ago Pub & bar manager here. This happened at my previous pub. New guy's first shift and he was constantly on his phone and going for cigarette breaks without permission. 2 hours into his shift his mates came in and he gave them all free drinks, shots and snacks, a few of them were under 18. Fired him on the spot and he had the audacity to appeal, despite overwhelming evidence against him including 5 witness statements and cctv, not to mention the stock count deficit.

Tags:

Scroll down for the next article
Forgot Password?