33 Valentine’s Days That Cupid Threw A Very Large Wrench In

‘I practiced my backflip for a week’
33 Valentine’s Days That Cupid Threw A Very Large Wrench In

We get it. Valentine’s Day is a made-up holiday about consumerism and displays of affection. And yes, there are plenty of badass holidays we’d rather have on the calendar, but we’re stuck with Cupid’s crap until he’s finally banned for public indecency. In the meantime, people are still attempting to use this one day of the year to declare their fondness for whomever they’re currently romantically involved with, occasionally to disastrous results. Just ask the guy who was on a Valentine’s Day date that got interrupted by the girl’s actual boyfriend who had been sitting at the bar the whole time. There are no winners in that situation. 

Redditors have opened up about the times Cupid was nowhere to be found, and we gotta hope everyone recovered from these situations — especially the guy who practiced his backflip for a week straight.

fate008 . 5y Had a man come the ER entrance and would not talk to any female nurses. Eventually we talked to him and he lost a vibrator in his rectum/colon. After x-rays we found it had worked its way up his desending colon and lodged itself at the bend going into his transverse colon. When it was pulled out from surgery, the vibrator was still running wide open. ... 5.6k
decafff 0 5y On my way to see my girlfriend, I stopped off to get a rose, as per tradition. When I was paying I found out I could buy two for the same price so I thought hey why not! Turns out in the country she is from, presenting someone with double roses is apparently something only done at funerals, so instead of a traditional romantic gesture I'd actually given her some death flowers...oops...luckily she saw the funny side after a few quizzical looks ... 1.2k
A Peelboy . 5y Allergic reaction from being kissed by somesone who had eaten food the other person was allergic to. ... 7.7k
OffensiveGender 4y These two were on a date and the guy went to go use the bathroom, The girl just up and leaves after he went to the restroom. When the guy came back he sat around for awhile until asking his waitress where she went. She replied with saying that she left. The guy then asked the waitress if she would go on a date with him. The waitress said no. ... 3.3k
kaylikesalatte . 4y Was a server at a popular seafood chain that isn't very fancy- but when you live in a town like the one I worked in, that sort of place is the nicest place to go for Valentines Day. Well, the night was incredibly busy when a couple came in. They were upset after waiting 45 minutes for a table, and they were complaining quite a lot. The woman was decked out in a super nice dress and faux fur coat that was actually very realistic. Well, she was sat and served her frozen drink. She goes to
LeapingMouse . 4y Not my table, but back in my Olive Garden days, we had a man who looked to be in his mid-20s tap his empty wine glass with a fork to call for attention of the surrounding strangers, then get down on one knee with silver band in hand , and ask his girlfriend/date to accept this promise ring. She looked horrified start to finish. ... 17k
rancid_cunt_bucket • . 4y Old man proposed to old woman. Не tried to get off the chair to kneel, tripped and fell and I assume broke something since he couldnt get back up and we had to call an ambulance. My manager had to drive her teeth to the hospital separately because she had taken them out to eat her soup (lord knows why) and left them on the table in the confusion.
ChefHannibal . 4y There was a note in our reservations that it was an engagement, they wanted champagne, a specific seat, bunch of other stuff. The server comes up to the table with something like so I read we're celebrating an engagement, congratulations. Confusion from the woman; glaring from the guy. Не hadn't proposed yet. She ruined it. ... 9.2k
samohkt. 7y My girlfriend gave me a pack of cigarettes because I was trying to quit smoking, and she thought it would help me relax. ... 15.8k
KeysOnATable . 3y Bartender here, Not my guest but a guest in the restaurant threw up on his steak not even a minute after it was placed in front of him. His date kept surprisingly calm for that scenario. ... 3k
beejeko . . 4y A guy did a backflip and asked a girl to be his valentine... she declined. I walked up to him and asked if he was fine, he said it took him a week to perfect. ... 13.4k
uReallyShouldTrustMe . . 4y I blew my cars tire and my friend came in to bail me out. Were both straight dudes and forgot it was valentines. Decided to have dinner and both were coming from important meeting so had suits on. We didnt catch on until the end on how the entire wait staff thought we were just the cutest gay couple. ... 3.3k
Theholynun . 4 4y I saw a couple have a full blown argument in the middle of the restaurant. The woman stood up, took her ring off, threw it at him and walked out. The man continued his meal, had dessert and then paid the bill, left a pretty big tip for the inconvenience and left! ... 50.4k
PackersFan8712 . 4y Saw a couple have a full on argument at a restaurant. I wasn't their server but the table was directly in the center of the restaurant and they were certainly loud enough for everyone to hear. My manager kindly asked them to leave and the guys response was to yell I've been wanting to do that shit for 2 years now and stormed out ... 28.5k
11y It was our second date, and we were out to have a nice romantic dinner. Right before the food comes, some guy approaches the table and says Who the fuck is this? Turns out, she didn't tell me that she had a boyfriend (who had been sitting at the bar). I apologized to the guy and left her with the bill. However I went up to the bar and I will pay his tab. ... 10
jimmyjohnjohnjohn 4y Two failed marriage proposals on the same Valentine's Day. The first one simply said no I can't do this, and walked out. The second one stared like a deer frozen in the headlights for an excruciating 30 seconds before muttering let's talk about this later. They stayed for the rest of their 6-course V-day special dinner, eating and making painful small talk. ... 43.9k
moneybagmeisenheimer . 4y - I served at a Japanese hibachi restaurant and once had a couple come and the dude dumps her after the meal. She then gets up and throws up a trail probably a good 20 feet as she runs to the bathroom. The dude got up and left the girl and I was left to clean the mess. ... 1.5k
Makabajones . 4y A Girl that I worked with went to lunch on Valentines day at an expensive restaurant her boyfriend had gotten a reservation for, she got dressed up nice was was going on about how sure she was that he was going to propose. Не broke up with her. ... 17.8k
wacht . 7y Once I ordered my girlfriend flowers that didn't arrive (or were stolen from the porch), so I gave her the delivery confirmation instead. It was not as funny as I thought it would be. ... 22.9k
Pentaxk1000 . 5y Her fire alarm is linked to the fire dept. set the alarm off while searing scallops. 5 firemen, one wielding an ахе, interrupted dinner. Embarrassment and laughter ensued. ... 1.8k
rjwyonch 4y It was like a movie. I was bartending at an italian restaurant (not a fancy one, but still) and it's pretty much full of valentines dates. A guy walks in and sits at the bar by himself, looking pretty down. Не asked for a whiskey, so I poured it, told him it was on the house because he looked like he needed it. Не proceeds to tell me his story: he had come to the city to surprise his girlfriend for Valentines (about a 5 hr bus trip between cities) and he sure surprised her. She was in
shepard_pie Зу So, I had some guy who couldn't get the concept of ravioli. Не kept asking if we hollowed out a spaghetti (his words) and stuffed it with lobster. I said no, but we did use pasta. Не kept reiterating that he wanted a pasta. It finally dawned on me, Sir, do you think that spaghetti is the Italian word for pasta? His date was clearly unimpressed, but I finally get him down for an order of Lobster Ravioli, even though he still seemed unaware of what he was actually ordering. After he got his food, ate one of
fievelm 0 4y Guy proposed to his girlfriend on a city bus. Bus driver thought it was so awesome he had them recreate it at the next three stops for the benefit of new passengers while everyone waited. I don't miss taking the bus. ... 144
Kara_S Зу I worked at a fine dining restaurant years ago )-- a middle aged guy comes up to me, hands me a gorgeous sapphire and diamond ring - - just gorgeous - - and asks me to have the pastry chef include it with his companion's dessert. The chef found beautiful blooms to decorate her dessert plate and placed the ring in the middle of one. She saw the ring, took it out of the flower, and placed it on the table. Then, she picked up her fork and started to eat her dessert without saying anything at all. The ring must have been an
venustas 4y I was working as a waitress in a Sushi restaurant and Valentine's Day was an all-hands-on-deck shift. This guy I had just started seeing wanted to go out, but I told him that working in food service, you never get Valentine's Day off and we'd just have to celebrate the day after or the weekend after. Nope. Не got so upset that he went and asked a different girl out, came to the restaurant I worked at on V-Day and sat in MY SECTION. Не then proceeded to spend the entire evening making a fool out of himself
liquidcatshit . 5y Had a guy come in who was not fully responsive, and one of the first things we do with pts like this is strip them naked. We come to find that he has a 3-5 lb weight/ring thing around his balls. Had to call engineering to get some tools to get it off. Not sure if this was a regular every day thing or something special for the holiday. Either way, dude had a giant weight on his balls. ... 9.6k
allthewrongwords 4y Back when I served food at one of those super touristy seafood restaurants, I worked a Valentine's Day double shift. For lunch, this younger couple came in celebrating their one year anniversary. I offer my congratulations and proceed to do my usual spiel before taking orders. The girl is looking more and more dismayed the longer I talk. Finally I get to the end and ask if there are any allergies. She looks directly at her boyfriend and states, yes I'm allergic to fish and shellfish. Then looks over at me very sad. I made sure every aspect
Jukka_Sarasti . 4y A guy proposed to his girlfriend and she said no. The guy threw his arms up and ran out of the building.. Later, while waiting for someone to pick her up, she told us it was completely out of the blue, because they'd only been dating for a few months... Another V-Day, a guy raised a HUGE fuss over the fact that we wouldn't serve liquor to his under-aged girlfriend. ... 16.6k
courtneymadison . 3 3y One of our favorite regular customers brought in her boyfriend for the first time and in her excitement she bumped into a table and knocked someone's cup off, which isn't bad but in her haste to pick up the cup she hit her head on the corner of the metal table and cut her forehead open. It looked like a mini crime scene.
Weisskopf . . 7y My (then) girlfriend and I met at a Wendy's, which was being torn down for remodeling. My bright idea was to have dinner, a movie, and then swing by the wreckage and take a brick to remind us of the fast food chain that meant so much to us. Yikes. Bonus! I locked us out of my car and my mother had to come unlock it for us! ... 2.3k
Yeetacus420 . 4y Had a man and woman sharing dessert and the man playfully put a bit of the ice cream on her nose she then did the same and he did it back once more but with a different flavour of ice cream. She the flipped out at him because you know I like chocolate the most why would you waste it you idiot. In the end she stormed out cause the man couldn't comprehend how much she was blowing up the situation.
grub_en 4y Bus boy on Las Vegas Strip, An attempted proposal. Dude tries to set up sign with gf's friends for her to show up and see the ring near a fountain. Duck stole the ring, they found it 2 hours later as he dropped in the fountain. She still said yes. Free drinks where given. ... 19.4k
reflectorbelt 11y First date, I take her to a movie, (thats what she wanted to do). Then we went out to eat a an Italian resteraunt. During the meal I feel my stomach start bubbling. Her friend calls her and says she locked her keys inside and needed her to come let her in. Her apartment was a good 30 minute drive. So we leave my stomach is making some noises, and Im feeling it. Halfway through through the drive it hits me, Im about to crap my pants. So Im speeding to her house, with the windows down and

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