19 of the Funniest Burns from the Week of February 5, 2024

Sure, dude
19 of the Funniest Burns from the Week of February 5, 2024

After Disney’s Q1 2024 earnings call earlier this week, a windfall of new releases have been added to the calendar. Anthropomorphic animals will return for more life lessons and shenanigans when Zootopia 2 premieres in the fall of 2025, and Andy’s toys and Anna and Elsa will return in 2026, which is when Toy Story 5 and Frozen 3 will be hitting theaters, respectively. In the live-action realm, we can also look forward to Greta Gerwig’s Snow White remake, Tron 3 and Barry Jenkins’ Lion King prequel exploring the origins of the late Mufasa. 

But the most surprising news of all was the announcement of Moana 2, poised to set sail on the big screen this November. Auli’i Cravalho and Dwayne Johnson reprising their roles as Moana and Maui respectively isn’t necessarily shocking; the two were always set to come back — but in a television series. Now, after four years of development for Disney+, it seems as though Disney is going to frankenstein whatever usable elements they had from the TV show into a feature-length sequel, which is sure to be a recipe for disaster (look no further than The Little Mermaid II: Return to the Sea). One more shock in the Russian nesting doll of surprises? Lin-Manuel Miranda will not be returning as one of the film’s songwriters, which has some Twitter users wondering what the “most unemployed musical man currently alive” could be doing with his time instead. 

That said, the Hamilton hitmaker — and sure-to-be auteur behind a future low-ranking Rotten Tomatoes cinematic adaptation of it — aren’t the only ones getting flamed by the timeline this week. Other digital burn victims included a different jovial singer, a horrified It’s Always Sunny… actor and the French (but of course).

jeremy allen black @blackcin... 16h ... me after 6 tequila shots SPECTATOR INDEX The Spectator Index @... . 17h BREAKING: President Biden says his memory is 'fine' and 'I know what I am doing' 69 15K 126K 6.3M
jake @huntichon 19h ... If you're single on Valentine's Day it's cuz you're ugly. Don't ever forget that. If you looked better you would have the person you want 23 925 4,007 186K
Ken Klippenstein @kenklippenstein 13h Instead of an election let's just see who can draw a clock better 60 819 7.7K 233K
victor newman @_mykavelli - 3d ... My nephew pretending he on the phone and said Yeah my auntie over here eating like always. GIF ALT 90 3.4K 50K 1M
luca @adultbuttman.4 4d swifties posting im about to be so annoying YOURE ALREADY ANNOYING 186 15K 117K 3.3M
Mr. Chau @Srirachachau 19h Imagine being possessed by the French...horrifying Sam Raimi Updates @SamRaimiUpdates 21h The 6th upcoming Evil Dead film will have a French twist to it. (Via: bloody-disgusting.com/movie/3799163/..) 97 2.6K 36K 1.8M
eli @losergarment 2d her stance is so jovial, like she is about to tapdance and sing me a song about the streets of new york or something 333 9.2K 15 185K
al @isladeperr0s - 1d announced randomly on a tuesday with 9 months to release, reworked from a scrapped tv show and the most unemployed musical man currently alive somehow not coming back to do the songs. we're getting an all timer stinker DF DiscussingFilm @DiscussingFilm -1 1d First teaser for 'MOANA 2' In theaters this November. 0:16 2K 32K 1.6M 81
becks @rebeccabreezyy - 3d this is still the funniest snap post I've ever seen ? kraziest thing to me is ppl on the subway with NO inventory at all like zero items jus straight person 19 17K 222K 17M
La Lipstick Pusher @_PanamaGold.4d She looks like a cigarette. mrs banks @jaeeebizzlee.4 4d Oilara JINGIN EIJI believe any - 2.2K 12K 110K 9.2M
Grovy @grovymango 1d I figured out why I don't like taylor swift it's bc she has this vibe TEA FLOUR MEOW SUGAR LOUR SUGAR SMILE ١٨٠٢٠ HFV CIII CEDEAL uso LO HER LIFAI HERS SUGAR SPREAD CRE/ CREAM DANCE iW SWEETIE FRIEND NIBBLI EFEE M TEA LO COFFEE FAMILY LOVE BE MINE COFFEE FLOUR TEA TEA 616 11K 146K 7.7M
girl dennis reynolds @paddysroyco 3d i need glenn to stop posing like he's seen the horrors FOUR WALLS la il FOUR WALLS the adidas 140 1.9K 44K du 2M
lily de mellow-orr @wooingofetain 3d ... tweeting something like this should get you sent to the hague Tortured Poet @swiftieee97.4d Will you join this group? THE TORTURED POETS DEPARTMENT William Emily Taylor Alison Swift Shakespeare Dickinson Chairman Member Member Edgar Allan Oscar Wilde John Keats Poe Member Member Member 6 556 7.4K 264K
Dr Sean Travers @seanjetravers . 4d Some guy on the bus using Apple Vision Pro 1.4K 32K 21 669K
SomeTattedTruckin'Mf @SheName... 3d ... That's crazy 9 8 7 6 5 4 hood princess @dajdadondada.4d just found a tortilla in my purse 367 8.3K 63K 6.8M
Lolo @LolOverruled 2d bro got paid 3 million dollars to get shredded is he really complaining Culture Crave @CultureCrave.2d Kumail Nanjiani says he started going to therapy over the bad reviews for #Eternals I was too aware of it ... I was reading every review ...I worked so hard for it 64 34 2.2K 138K
Josh Gondelman @joshgondelman - 3d This is just called hanging out then. D Decider @decider. 3d Bill Maher recently revealed he had a two-hour interview with Ye, the rapper formerly known as Kanye West, for his podcast - but it will likely never be released trib.al/JfTPOb2 UI TV BIG IN ALT 29 129 4.1K 198K
Gleeok Stan Account @csmith03 . 3 3d Famed heterosexual Alexander the Great from the famously heterosexual times of Ancient Greece LSUPPORT THE End Wokeness Follow @EndWokeness FORMIT THINGS Netflix made a new documentary about Alexander The Great. Within the first 8 minutes, they turned him gay. A NETFLIX SERIES ALEXANDER THE MAKING OF A GOD 0:17 ONLY ON NETFLIX JANUARY 31 6:18PM.2024-02-05 8.830K Views 1.2K Reposts 530 Quotes 10K Likes 609 Bookmarks 993 22K 238K 11M
Jäsón? @yaesohn • 21h ... VISIBLE NUDITY Camilla too!? They're dropping like flies! - NEWS - BBC News (UK) @BBCN... 1d Horse that led Queen's funeral procession to Windsor Castle dies bbc.in/3UtOYIO 183 5,119 72K 3.1M

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