18 of the Funniest Burns from the Week of January 29, 2024

Today’s most depraved tech guru continues to push the boundaries of innovation in ways that no one is asking for. This week, Elon Musk took to Twitter to announce that the first human recipient of a Neuralink implant is supposedly “recovering well” and showing “promising neuron spike detection.” The company, which was founded in 2016, is seeking to “redefine the boundaries of human capability” by enabling people to control devices like phones and computers simply by thinking. Twitter users weren’t shy about sharing their thoughts on the matter, going as far as to say that Musk’s update on the project reads exactly like something you’d find in just about every sci-fi horror game from the last 30 years. 

Hopefully, reality doesn’t imitate art, because the last thing we need are Muskified zombies roaming the Earth — Twitter Blue subscribers are horrifying enough.

That said, Musk and the Neuralink recipient were in good company this week in terms of digital burns. Other sick digs included those about art-school kids, a girl who sounds like Mr. Krabs and Justin Timberlake having his own music held against him.