29 Hilarious Stories of Karmic Retribution

There are a LOT of robberies gone wrong here
29 Hilarious Stories of Karmic Retribution

While getting revenge can feel good, sitting back and waiting for karma to take hold can be even more satisfying. And the faster karmic retribution kicks in, the more gratified we can feel. One Redditor has told the story of a friend who, out of boredom at a party, decided to shake things up by flipping over the food table. Chips and salsa “went flying,” and the friend broke into a run to escape the mayhem they caused. Moments later, this guy tripped over a branch, broke his teeth and is now doomed to a lifetime of dentures. 

Other Redditors have also popped in to give a play-by-play of the times karma was swift in their lives, and if any of you are planning on robbing someone and making a getaway, definitely give these stories a read first. 

Outlander56 . 5y Watched an entitled angry man abuse and belittle his server to the point of tears. Then he hitched up his belt and looked pleased with himself as he swaggered off the restaurant deck, tripped on the stairs, and face planted in the sand on the beach. (This was a vacation in Fla.) My wife looked mortified as I laughed right out loud at the guy. Не got up, saw everyone staring and at least one person openly laughing, and quickstepped off down the beach. ... 10k
8y I asked my boyfriend if he wanted to take his bag of Doritos with him. Не said that he would eat them when he came back over later that night. Не wasn't even out of the driveway when I started eating them. Somehow, a crumb got into my eye. It was so painful to open that eye that I had to have my dad bring me over eyewash and I ended up going to urgent care because my eye was so blood shot that it was bright red. I couldn't see out of that eye for a few
7y I saw a guy driving crazily on this back country road, passing people around curves, going what seemed like 50% faster than any other car nearby. A few minutes after he'd passed my car I passed him again because he'd run off the road and was stuck in a ditch. ... 11
LadyVerene . 7y Guy comes in and is being a complete asshole. Not wanting to show ID to buy beer even though he looked 20 at the oldest, constantly yelling and swearing. Не also had parked in the handicap spot despite not having handicap tags or plates on his car. One of my regular customers, who is a sheriff's deputy, was also in the store. Saw how the guy was acting. Saw where he was parked. Went out, got his ticket book, and wrote the guy a ticket. Guy realized he wasn't getting his beer, went outside...to find he was
Rainlasher . 5y Friend stole her mum's dessert out the fridge to bring to work for lunch... by the time she got to the office it exploded in her brand new handbag and was EVERYWHERE. All over her phone, car keys and fluffy pom pom key chain... needless to say no more yogurts have been nicked ... 131
stovetopbrand . 5y One day a few years ago I was grabbing McDonalds near work to eat something last second before my shift. It was one of those two lane microphone deals. I blatantly finish ordering before the other lane before he stomps on the gas to cut me off. His car breaks down right there, and I get to take my rightful turn in line. ... 7.6k
MyNamelsNotRyn 5y I used to be a zookeeper. This bitch was making fun of our llama for looking ugly. The llama was a rescue who had corrective jaw surgery. The bitch pointed and laughed at our llama. The llama spat in her mouth. I gave the llama a treat and told her that she was a good girl.
DrDudeManJones 5y My dad told me this story. Не was driving back from the shore when traffic got really bad. About a mile ahead, there was an accident that had brought traffic to a crawl. Shit happens, my dad decides to be patient about it. Others weren't so patient. People began driving on the shoulder in order to get ahead of the traffic. This pisses my dad off. We all know how this goes. We do the right thing and are punished for it, where as these assholes are skipping in front traffic and will probably get away with it.
mizzbrightside . 4y A customer being an absolute asshat and treating me like a lesser being just because I work in a convenience store and was threatening to get my pay cut in half, but then again, you don't make that much anyway. His card declined and he had to abandon his items. It was glorious. ... 1.6k
. 5y A former roomate got extremely angry and put all of his weight into a punch against a wall in our apartment. That was poured in the early 1920's. If you've never heard the sound of nearly everything forward of the elbow instantly disintegrate on impact, you've done well in life up to this point. ... 38
BalancedEdge . 8y Climbing around a boulder field with some friends, being cautious because copperheads were native to the area. Guy ahead mocks us for going slow, then immediately slips off a rock. : 24
PizzaSeb . 8y Friend was bored at a party so he decided to flip the food table. Chips and bowls of Salsa went flying and he started to run. Tripped over a branch and smashed his teeth on a rock. Rushed to the hospital and now wears fake teeth. ... 3
gocubs44 . 7y I work at an auto parts store. This one guy stole some $60 headlights and literally sprinted out the door. We went to look outside to try and get his license plate, just in time to see him speed off, hit a curb, and blow out his tire. Called the cops and the dumbass got arrested and had to have his car towed. ... 4.8k
VariousHandSoaps - 5y It was my own karma. I was in eighth grade. I was standing on a bench when I watched some girl fall over in the yard, started laughing and pointing and then went to lean back onto the fence that was behind the bench. Turns out it had broken off where I was standing and I fell straight through and into the mud. ... 3.5k
omglookawhale . ! 5y I banged by knee on the corner for a hotel bed and my husband was laughing his ass off while he was brushing his teeth in the bathroom. As soon as he walks out of the bathroom, his hit his knee the exact same way and I got to laugh my ass off. ... 11.4k
. 7y Lady lays into me for the amount of the bill, called me every bad word in the english language. Says we overbilled her, she requested I go through her order. Come to find out we underbilled her by a $ 1000 dollars due to a misplaced zero. The silence on the other line was so beautiful. ... 1.2k
korthlm . 5y Walking down the San Antonio Riverwalk. Guy in front of us gets pooped on by a bird. Friend turns to me and says, sucks to suck! Friend literally gets pooped on as well, right at this moment. ... 9.5k
DarthReeder . 5y Driving through Philly in standstill traffic some asshat decides to use the shoulder as a lane to cut in line. The vehicle he ended up cutting off was a state trooper. An instant whoop whoop and told to pull off the highway over a loudspeaker. I couldn't stop laughing. ... 10.8k
N3MO_ . . 5y My dog tried to eat my sushi while I was away from the table for a second. I came back to missing wasabi and a disgusted-looking dog ... 17.9k
-teaqueen- 8y When I was a daycare teacher, a toddler whacked me on the back with a toy. As he was running away laughing, he fell on his face. So satisfying. ... 70
Lostkiddo101 5y Happened while visiting NY. I watched someone bend down to pick up a wallet someone ahead of them had just dropped. All of this was going down in the crosswalk and I was in the passenger seat with my dad driving. GuyA who picked up the wallet began run it to GuyB who was already across the street and while doing so, his wallet fell out of his pocket and on the sidewalk/crosswalk area. Some shitty dude in the bike lane rode up a little ways ahead, bent down, and picked it up and just started heading off.
cervidaes 5y Was buying some drinks at a circle K one day while visiting someone in Florida and these old tourists cut us in line, all the while complaining and bitching loudly about everything, how expensive everything is, how crowded the beach is, it's too hot, etc. they are also really rude to the cashier and take forever arguing about the price of the hot dogs they were buying or something. They leave and as we walk out we witness a seagull come and snatch the guy's hot dog right out of his hand. His wife then shrieks and proceeds
apocalypticradish . 5y Drunk guy at the bar started yelling at the bartender for cutting him off. Called her bitch and whore multiple times and then tried to scoot his bar stool back. Instead it caught on the carpet and he fell backwards like a tree falling. It made a very audible thud and of course, everyone stops what they're doing to look. Не laid there for a minute, got up and stumbled to the door as everyone continued to stare at him. Definitely never saw him again. ... 2.7k
mopedophile . 11y I was stopped at a red light waiting to turn right. I couldn't see if there was any traffic coming because of how the intersection was set up and the bus in the left turn lane so I was just waiting for a green. The person behind me clearly wanted me to turn because she was honking, yelling and giving me the finger. After a couple seconds she decided to drive around me and was immediately T-boned. ... 908
Grey_Gryphon . 5y Asshole kid in middle school kept trying to steal my cellphone (it was a cheap flip phone, but he'd do it just to piss me off). Our school had a rule that you couldn't have your phone out in class. Teacher left the classroom for a second to have a brief word with an administrator, jerkass kid grabbed my phone. Teacher came back in a moment later and caught him red- handed with (my) phone out. She wouldn't believe it wasn't his phone. Не got detention. ... 10.3k
danpisha . 5y My wife was jogging, and a man starts driving slow and cat calling her. Doesn't realize it's a red light and rear- ends a truck, totally destroying his Prius. Cop was stopped at the same red light and saw the whole situation. Cop laughed and asked my wife to fill out a witness statement. Edit: it was a busy street, so when I say driving slow, I mean he slowed down while passing her, probably hit the lady in the truck doing about 35 in a 50. ... 4.2k
somebeansbeans 5y I have a large birthmark on the right side of my neck. It goes from the bottom of my jawline to my chest and it is a pretty dark red. In the fifth grade, a classmate called me rash girl throughout recess. I remember crying at home later and talking to my parents about getting it removed. (I never did and I'm so happy I kept it). Same kid came in later that week absolutely covered in poison ivy. ... 60
ChileConCaveman 5y I worked at a grocery store. I was stocking Instant Noodles on a big sale display. All I had was a cheap small step 2 step stool, you know the one with the bar that runs across the top step? Reaching down to the stool from the shelf I was standing on, was about 3 feet .I had a 60% chance my foot would land on the top bar and collapse the thing. I asked a coworker to use his shoulder as a handle as I got down. My supervisor called me a princess for getting assistance. Soon
Maximum_Red . 8y While still in high school, my brother and I ran out of gas and had to push our car into the nearby gas station. As we were pushing the car into the gas station a car full of immature high schoolers drove by slowly with everyone's fingers pointing out the window laughing, driver too. Не wasn't paying attention to the road and while they were still pointing, ran into the car in front of them. They stopped laughing. ... 88

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