15 Wide-Ranging Movie Insults That Really Cut to the Quick

Don’t hurt your puny brain trying to think of a comeback — use these instead!
15 Wide-Ranging Movie Insults That Really Cut to the Quick

If you’re reading this list, it’s because you’ve found yourself vastly under-equipped for a verbal melee, and you’re looking for ammo. Your instincts are correct: Do not try to come up with something yourself. Instead, select one of these tried and true Hollywood burns…

Brick Tamland’s Burn in Anchorman Was Supposed to Be Dumb, But This Would Scorch You to the Bone

“Where’d you get those clothes, the toilet store?”

The Quote That Inspired the Principal to Threaten Bender with “the Horns” in The Breakfast Club

“Yeah, I got a question. Does Barry Manilow know you raid his wardrobe?”

John Malkovich in Con Air

“You’re somewhere between a cockroach and that white stuff that accumulates at the corner of your mouth when you’re really thirsty.”

This Goofball Non Sequitur from Monty Python and the Holy Grail May Actually Mean: Your Mom Is a Prolific Fornicator, and Your Dad Is a Drunk

“Your mother was a hamster, and your father smelt of elderberries.”

Wanda Popping Off in A Fish Called Wanda

“To call you stupid would be an insult to stupid people! I’ve known sheep that could outwit you. I’ve worn dresses with higher IQs. But you think you’re an intellectual, don’t you, ape?”

Parenthood’s Take on Cohabitation

“I wouldn’t live with you if the world were flooded with piss and you lived in a tree.”

This Most Distinguished Zinger from Gangs of New York

“I don’t give a tuppenny fuck about your moral conundrum, you meat-headed shit sack.”

Point Break on the Depletion of America’s Number One Natural Resource

What I don’t know is how you got assigned here. Guess we must just have ourselves an asshole shortage, huh?”

The Princess Bride on How to Make Sure Your Message Is Received

“I’ll explain, and I’ll use small words so that you’ll be sure to understand, you warthog-faced buffoon.”

A Gorgeous Misdirect from Kiss Kiss Bang Bang

Perry: Look up “idiot” in the dictionary. You know what you’ll find?

Harry: A picture of me?

Perry: No! The definition of the word “idiot,” which you fucking are.

School of Rock Showed Us That Nothing Cuts Deeper Than a Child’s First Impression

“You’re tacky, and I hate you.”

This Third-Degree Burn from Star Wars Singes Even Here in Our Galaxy

“Why, you stuck-up, half-witted, scruffy-looking nerf herder.”

This Buzz Lightyear Line Is Probably the Meanest One on the List

“You are a sad strange little man, and you have my pity.”

The Mist Has a Great Strategy for Making Friends

“I’ll tell you what. The day I need a friend like you, I’ll just have myself a little squat and shit one out.”

And Finally, This All-Timer from Knocked Up

“Your face looks like Robin Williams’ knuckles.”

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