15 Great Clapbacks and Burns By Celebs Getting Roasted
Celebrities have no respite from roasts. In friendly late-night show interviews, in press junkets, even on their own phones, everyone’s always trying to land a punch. They’re trained to take it in stride, but once in a while, they decide to pull an Uno Reverse card.
Frankie Muniz Puts It All in Perspective
When Twitter user @iHeartMtnDEW said “ur acting is just, awful,” Muniz replied, “Yeah, but being retired with $40,000,000.00 at 19 has not been awful. Good luck moving out of your moms house before you’re 35.”
A (Somewhat Ableist) Burn from James Blunt
When Twitter user @jthundersrocks said “I broke up with my girlfriend because she likes your music. She’s obviously deaf,” Blunt responded, “If she was your girlfriend, she was probably blind as well.”
Keke Palmer Stood Her Ground on ‘The Wendy Williams Show’
Williams had previously downplayed Palmer’s claims of sexual harassment from Trey Songz, and Palmer confronted her on her own show.
Will Smith Wrote a Whole Song to Hit Back at Wendy Williams
After a long history of gossiping publicly about Smith’s personal life, he dedicated a bar of his song “Mr. Niceguy” to her:
Wendy Williams, you don’t know me
I’m not your punching bag
You gon blow me up girl you better leave me alone
Before I buy your radio station and send you home
Maybe Don’t Tell Simone Biles to Smile
After the judges showered her with praise, Tom Bergeron said, “I was waiting for you to smile at some of the compliments; you didn’t.” Biles took a moment to harness the boundless rage clearly burning in her gut and said, “Smiling doesn’t win you gold medals.”
David Letterman Insults Colombia, and Sofia Vergara Isn’t Having It
Vergara insisted that Letterman should visit her home country, which Letterman immediately dismissed with “I’m afraid I would be kidnapped.” Without missing a beat, she assured him, “They don’t even know who you are over there.”
Michael B. Jordan Defends His Parents (And Anime)
Twitter user @chrisfrom_216 wrote, “Michael B Jordan Is A 5’ 9” Adult Man That Loves Anime & Lives With His Parents….Y’all Told Me All Of Those Things Were Unacceptable Though.” Jordan — who wasn’t tagged in the tweet, by the way — responded, “First of All I’m 6ft and they live with ME, put some respeck on my name. LOL…aaaand goku & naruto are real ones”
Nicki Minaj Confronts Miley Cyrus Live at the VMAs
After accepting an award in 2015, Minaj said, “Now back to this bish that had a lot to say about me the other day in the press, Miley what’s good?” Cyrus struggled to return to her hosting duties after that.
Steve Harvey Helps Jimmy Kimmel Triangulate His Net Worth
Kimmel kept prodding Harvey about his net worth, saying, “I’ve just been trying to add it all up.” Harvey told him, helpfully, “If I was a billionaire, I wouldn’t be on your show.”
Anne Hathaway Is Sick of Talking About Her Workout Regimen
While doing a press marathon for The Dark Knight Rises, Hathaway had to field endless questions about her diet and exercise habits. She finally turned the question back around on one unlucky interviewer: “Are you trying to lose weight? What’s the deal man? You look great. No, seriously, we have to talk about this. Are you trying to fit into a catsuit?”
Oprah Sets the Record Straight on Her Activism
When Twitter user @addonether wrote, “when are u going 2 give back 2 the ghettos in america?”, Oprah replied, “I’ve put 500 African American men thru college. And u sir?”
Celebrity Chef Gino D'Acampo Deadpans the Greatest Comeback in Recorded History
While cooking something up for a morning show, a host commented, “If it had, like, ham in it… it’s closer to a British carbonara.” D’Acampo stared in disbelief for a second, before saying, “If my grandmother had wheels, she would’ve been a bike.”
Justin Bieber, Roastmaster General
Bieber had a pretty solid rebuttal in his own Friars Club roast: “What do you get when you give a teenager $200,000,000? A bunch of has-beens calling you a lesbian for two hours.”
Tom Is Not Your Friend
When Myspace Tom weighed in on an Instagram controversy, some guy tried to swat him down on Instagram with, “Says the guy that was not able to keep a social network alive.” Tom was sure to correct him: “Says the guy who sold myspace in 2005 for $850 million while you slave away hoping for a half-day off.”
Terry Crews Slaps Down Accusations That He’s Rude
Twitter user @_ericabrianne wrote, “I think the spookiest thing that happened last night at Horror Nights was when Terry Crews RUDELY said, ‘UH Nooo,’ when I asked for a picture.” Crews piped up: “No the scariest thing I saw was you RUDELY PUSHING THROUGH MY KIDS LIKE A ZOMBIE to ask for one.”
