32 of the Funniest Things People Did While They Were High

‘I went through the McDonald's drive-thru and ordered a large chocolate Coke’
32 of the Funniest Things People Did While They Were High

Marijuana can provide many positive effects. For example, feeling good. One domain it does not help with, however, is an increase in IQ, especially in the short-term. Even for the most lateral of thinkers, it’s a tough sell that an elevated individual is a quick and efficient problem-solver.

Sometimes, being high leads to momentary, borderline inexplicable mistakes that would have even comic-relief movie characters raising an eyebrow. Though usually these occur in relative privacy, we’re lucky enough to have a whole Reddit thread of weed-enabled wuh-ohs to review. 

Read some of the best below.

satooshi-nakamooshi . 4y ago I saw tiny tiny bugs crawling over a little flower among the grass. I realized they had never heard music before, poor lil guys, so I put my phone next to the flower and gave them the concert of a lifetime
Gabriel_Issimo . 4y ago The bouncer at the entrance of the club put his arms out to indicate that I should do so for him to pat me down. Instead I though he wanted a hug so | hugged him.
Blackcat1206 4y ago . Edited 2y ago I convinced myself that I could really walk and it was just mind over matter, and despite my boyfriend and friends telling me not to, I rose up from my wheelchair and, promptly fell under the pub table. | was covered in bruises, and I had a sore bum for days. My boyfriend and his best mate had to retrieve me from under the table.
TeHNyboR. 4y ago I microwaved cheesecake because stoned me found it odd that it was always served cold and not hot like it should be. And on a related note, piping hot cheesecake will take those munchies away real quick
Mathinpozani . 4y ago Edited 4y ago Not dumbest but laziest. I microwaved something and when i opened the door to get it, because it wasn't centered on the turning plate, it was a bit further from the door. So i closed it and restarted the microwave another 5s to get it closer to me so I didnt have to reach so far back to get it.
Scarlaymama0721 4y ago One night I go in the backyard to get high. I leave the backyard lights off so that my older neighbors can't see what I'm doing cause I'm immature like that lol. I got a glass of ice water in one hand and I stepped into my pitch black backyard. Every time | move I hear a sound like there is an animal stalking me in the many bushes in my backyard. Whenever I stop the sound stops but once I start moving again it sounds to me like the leaves in the bushes in our backyard
hippiesoul03 4y ago Needed to go into the gas station to get another dutch. Noticed for whatever reason my best friends boyfriend had a full chicken costume in the backseat. I decided it would be funny to wear JUST the mask into the gas station. Didn't realize how bad I fucked up til the girl at the register started screaming for the guy in the back room. They had just been robbed 2 weeks prior
 E 4y ago A sober friend put the other high guys phone in my bag, i i found it funny so i i left it there. I completely forgot and took it home with me, later on an alarm goes, so i go investigate and then find the phone. Tried to tell the guy and called his phone. The phone that was in my hand.
Poxalox a 4y ago Once I was eating a burrito like a ravenous beast and straight up bit my own finger. Another time I was gaming and my hands were cold, as I can get bad circulation. Well i sat there thinking man it would be great if they made socks, but for your hands and thought I had a great idea. 10 seconds go by and then Oh yeah, gloves!. Had a good laugh at myself for that one
 . 4y ago Playing video games with my bro, split screen MW3. I'm absolutely crushing it then | realized I'm looking at the wrong screen, my dude is in a corner moving and shooting the wall.
 . 4y ago I was typing on the computer and kept trying to make the numbers uppercase because | couldn't figure out why | was just getting %]%*]+
LoosKiii ОР . 4y ago Once I was looking at the moon and | was just noticing the details in it, and I took a step forward to get a closer look like a dumbass
nbenny3242 4y ago One time when I was in high school, my mom went grocery shopping and of course I used her time away to smoke a joint. When she came back with the groceries, she called me out to the car to help bring them inside. I put some Visine in, slipped on my flip flops and headed for the car. As I'm bringing the groceries in maybe two, three bags at a time, I'm bringing them all the way to my bedroom instead of the kitchen. My mom locks the car, walks in the kitchen and says where
hemingward 4y ago I got super blazed one night near the beginning of pandemic lockdown, and went across the street to the drugstore to get some chips and such. As i approached the automatic glass doors i saw a person standing on the other side, SO i waited for them to come through. I stood there waiting for what felt like an eternity. I was getting frustrated, like what's up with this clown? Cant they see I'm waiting for them? Then i realized it was just my reflection.
osvalds1 4y ago This one time I was Infront of my TV watching comedians in cars getting coffee I had my bong on the coffee table between me and the TV. I am seeing Jerry Seinfeld driving someone in new York and suddenly I can see a cop car joining their lane behind them. I quietly and slowly took the bong down on the floor so the cops can't see it..
No_Leader_2711 4y ago Ate cat food. When I lived with my parents they had 2cats. They would buy huge bags of cat food and put the food in a 5gallon bucket with a lid and keep it in the garage. Usually to keep it safe from outdoor animals since it's the country and there is possum, raccoons, mice, and other small critters. Well I got home one night from hanging out with friends and seen the bucket of food was open. I went inside and the self feeder was close to empty, so I decided to refill it. When I
RotundMarmot O 4y ago Edited 4y ago Almost gave myself hypothermia. While on a hike I picked up a big ass rock to throw onto a frozen lake and break the ice. I decided to walk out onto the ice to throw it. Rock hit the ice, ice broke, I fell in. Had to walk about 2 miles back to the car.
sean20317 . 4y ago I went through the McDonald's drive-thru and ordered a large chocolate Coke
ClosetBoy1213 . 4y ago I forgot how 3d works. | was looking at a window and didn't realise why one part of the window was bigger than the other... oh because it's closer yeah makes sense
PinkPowerRanger13 . 4y ago Was holding my cereal in one hand and phone in the other. Went to toss the phone on my bed, tossed the cereal instead.
zenniezou . 4y ago 3 of us went to Dunkin Donuts. Ordered 3 dozen. Left them all there on the counter and didn't notice until we got home. Had to go back. Because donuts.
Violinist-Rich . 4y ago I was too stoned to listen to my partner talk, but too awkward to tell him so. I opted to slowly and gently rub his face with a new roll of toilet paper instead, hoping it would distract him into being quiet. It did not work.
Fearless_Act_6222 . 4y ago Edited 4y ago Check behind my paintings in the living room for hidden cameras because | was convinced the portraits had cameras where the lady's eyes are and that people (I don't know who, just people) were watching me laugh while | watched TV.
onebowlwonder 4y ago | do this all the time and it pisses me off. I get some juice or milk from the fridge, take the cap off and be like, oh I forgot to shake this. Proceed to shake juice all over myself, kitchen floor and my dog. More milk has been poured into my german shepherds ears then she probably drank as a puppy.
KOO qsnickers 4y ago went to a restaurant and ordered a side salad for my entree salad bc i forgot i i had ordered a salad
FlatBot 4y ago When I was in college I was super broke like most college kids. Like can't afford basics like shaving cream or toothpaste half time. I got high and went to an ATM to get some cash. I probably had $60 in my bank account and took out $40. But I was high and for some reason thought I requested $20 from the machine and got $40 dispensed. So, high dumbass me was afraid that I'd get caught and goes into the bank, up to a teller and hands her $20 and said the ATM gave me too
buttsarehilarious . 4y ago . Edited 2y ago I cried because | saw my reflection in a ruffles chip.iremember thinking i looked like a frog.
ashrob9015 . 4y ago Put soap in my eyes then cognitively telling myself not to put soap in my eyes, I then once again put soap in my eyes.
squareskirts . 4y ago Told my friend who i was hosting that i will go fetch the last donut for her from the kitchen, 20 minutes later she decided to check on my whereabouts and saw me munching on the said donut in the kitchen.
Bobbyjacks . 4y ago I tried to blow on my ice cream because it was too cold
catbirdsand . 4y ago went to put my dirty clothes in the hamper and threw them in the trash instead
Blackdogrising1 . 4y ago Took a shower and like 15 minutes later | couldn't remember if I took one so I took another. | did this three times before the wife asked me WTF are you doing?

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