50 of the Funniest Burns from the Week of July 14, 2025

Was One of the Best ‘Simpsons’ Episodes Inspired by a Candy Commercial?

Bob Odenkirk Told Marc Maron About His Near-Death Experience: ‘The Whole Heaven Thing Is a Hoax’

How Lucille Ball’s Mother’s Laugh Popped Up on Other Shows for Decades

George Costanza Is a Valuable Psychological Case Study, Expert Argues

40 Random Bits of Trivia We Stole Off of Santa’s Sleigh While He Was Parked on Top of Your Mom’s House

Yeah that’s right

40 Random Bits of Trivia We Stole Off of Santa’s Sleigh While He Was Parked on Top of Your Mom’s House

September 25, 2024

McDonald's was convinced to keep its supple golden arches due to the… implications.

Click right here to get the best of Cracked sent to your inbox.

40

Nichelle Nichols

The late Uhura actress, Nichelle Nichols, will have her ashes launched into space. CRACKED.COM Celestis, Inc. said they'll use a United Launch Alli- ance rocket to launch more than 150 capsules contain- ing DNA samples and greetings, as well as cre- mated remains, on an end- less journey into space. — Fox Weather

39

Steve Irwin

Thanks to Steve Irwin's family, over 90,000 Australian animals were saved. AL NETR That includes animals who were victims of Australian wildfires - and it's thanks to the fact that they operate Australia Zoo's Wildlife Hospital. CRACKED.COM — Source

38

Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade

In Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade, the Joneses book a flight from Berlin to Athens on a commercial zeppelin in 1938. In actuality, no ticket would have been a problem for all of the passengers, since airship travel was no longer a thing due to the Hindenburg crash the year before. CRACKED.COM — Source: 27 Movies And Shows That Need Help With History

37

The Baby Food Diet

THE BABY FOOD DIET Supposedly started by celebrity trainer celebrity trainer Tracy Anderson in the early 2010s, the goal is to eat 14 baby food jars a day (about 1000 calories) with a small adult chewable dinner. CRACKED.COM — Source: Food Network

36

District 9

The District 9 voices were made from the sound of pumpkins being rubbed together combined with clicking and the actors' voices. CRACKED.COM — Source

35

COMEDY NERD Nick Kroll played a dead Edgar Allan Poe in Season 2 of the series Dickinson. Poe, who's surprisingly horny, rides with Death in his carriage and is disappointed they're not driving around to find fans of mine to sleep with. CRACKED.COM — Source

34

15th-century Spain deployed 250-pound war mastiffs. These were especially effective against enemies with little or no armor. Their powerful jaws easily tore through leather then flesh then bone. When Columbus made his second voyage to the New World and anticipated trouble, he packed some dogs (who were classed as weapons). CRACKED.COM — Source: Gruesome Horror Stories The History Books Left Out

33

Ice is a mineral, like quartz, copper, and gold. CRACKED.COM Ice is a naturally occurring compound with a defined chemical formula and crys- tal structure, thus making it a legitimate mineral. Its only limitation is that it is not stable at room tem- perature. — Source

32

The Blank Burger King Receipt

Burger King has emailed thousands of customers with a blank order email receipt. DRIVE IN ARTES BURGE KING KING RI BURGER KING - - WITH The ANTIK CRACKED COM Thanks to 'an internal pro- cessing error,' ВК sent con- fused burger fans a totally empty receipt, thanking them for their order which will be ready to be picked up at Burger King located at . — The Verge

31

THE WHITE HOUSE AND CAPITOL WERE ALMOST MOVED TO ST. LOUIS (BY TRAIN). CRACKED.COM After the Civil War, Congress was considering moving the nation's capital from Washington to St. Louis, since D.C. was no longer the center of the United States after westward expansion. St. Louis businessman Logan Uriah Reavis suggested loading the Capitol building, and others, onto a train in disassembled blocks and shipping them to Missouri. The plan actually made it to a vote in the House, only losing 77 to 97.

30

Some conjoined twins can feel and taste each other's sensations and... mouths? NOW YOU KNOW CRACKED.COM — Source: Now You Know: 18 Facts About Twins That'll Make You Double-Take

29

ALBERT BROOKS PREDICTED REALITY me TV IN 1979. FILMING THANKSGIVING His mockumentary film Real Life featured an obnoxious, intrusive camera crew trailing a family and deliberately stirring up conflict. It was meant as a sendup of a PBS documentary series, but with the twist that most of the drama was generated artificially by the producer. CRACKED.COM http://www.rogerebert.com/reviews/real-life-1979 — Source

28

40 Random Bits of Trivia We Stole Off of Santa’s Sleigh While He Was Parked on Top of Your Mom’s House — Source: Yahoo Entertainment

27

The tradition of leaving cookies and milk for Santa became popular in the Great Depression. FOR: Santa Parents used it as a way to try and teach kids that giving to others and showing gratitude for gifts were important. NOW YOU KNOW CRACKED.COM — Source

26

Corkscrew Tank CRACKED.COM The Soviets created this bizarro, inside-out Slap Chop that crawled across snow, ice, and even water, surprisingly well. The only downside was that it was essentially useless when it finally made it onto normal terrain. — 7 Military Weapons You Won't Believe They Actually Built

25

U.S. education: extra steps.

Healthcare around the world Europe's medical education You can start studying medicine right after you finish high school, whereas in the U.S. you need to go through an undergrad degree before you can do that. CRACKED — NDAB Creativity/Shutterstock
The Student Doctor Network

24

Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door CRACKED CONT The character Vivian was actually a male in the original Japanese version. But, because he smooches M

23

CRACKED.COM Worst TV Finales Mad Men For a show which was such a scathing criticism of the emptiness of consumerism and its soul-crushing consequences, to end with an overt celebration of Coca-Cola feels like it was mocking us all along. Coca-Cola — Source

32 Strange Early Drafts of Your Favorite Movies That Luckily Had Someone There to Say, ‘Umm, No!’

33 Retro Bits of Classic TV That Will Only Come in If You Turn Your Antenna A Little to the West

31 Random Bits of Trivia We Scooped Out of the Room-Temperature Cruise Buffet

30 Toys, Gadgets and Hobbies That Aren’t for the Faint of Heart

30 Law-Abiding Bits of Trivia About Criminals and the Crimes They’ve Committed

21 Jokes You Can Tell at Your Next Job Interview, See If That Gets You Anywhere

22

Some cicadas are so loud, they can almost cause physical pain to humans. Large cicada species have a call that's rated at over 120 decibels at a short distance, which is pretty close to how loud a sound has to be to cause pain in the ear. NOW YOU KNOW CRACKED.COM — Source

21

After Hurricane Katrina, Cuba & Venezuela were the first countries to offer assistance. CRACKED.COM They pledged over $1 mil- lion, several mobile hospi- tals, water treatment plants, canned food, bottled water, heating oil, 1,100 doctors and 26.4 metric tons of medicine - but were reject- ed by the US. — Source

20

British landowners used to hire ornamental hermits to live in their gardens. CRACKED.COM Wealthy landowners in the 18th century would place ads looking for individuals to dress as druids and live on their property, not bathe or talk to anyone for several years. — Source

19

Chinese Sunglasses

chinese judges wore sunglasses to appear impartial. In 12th-century China, judges wore smoky quartz glasses for the same reason you wear your Ray-Bans - to look aloof and above it all. Masking their facial expressions gave them the appearance of being impartial and detached. CRACKED.COM — More: The First Sunglasses Were Meant To Make You Look Like An Emotionless Slab

18

San Francisco Church

CRACKED.COM St. Boniface Church in San Francisco has been opening its doors to the homeless for the last 15 years. The church reserves 2/3 of its space for the endeavor, called The Gubbio Project. They provide warm blankets, shelter, and other necessary supplies for the houseless. The effort hasn't had a negative effect on the church, with 95% of churchgoers saying they felt completely safe there. — Source: Feel-Good Stories To Buoy All Our Souls

17

Bling it up?

OBSCUREJOBS GEMSETTER Watch gemsetters set gems in watches, if you can believe it. They use a variety of techniques - prong setting, bezel setting, rail setting, bead or pavé setting, and invisible or mystery setting - to create beautiful pieces with engraving, glyptics, and enameling. CRACKED — Jean-Claude Caprara/Shutterstock
Vacheron Constantine

16

CRACKED.COM Most of the audience is removed before a singer's identity is revealed on The Masked Singer. This is to minimize the risk of leaks. — Source

15

In the '60s, McDonald's was going to abandon their famous arches but... McDonald's Restaurant McDonald's McDonald's OPER NITTLE STAR a design consultant told them to keep them as Freudian symbol of a pair of nourishing breasts. NOW YOU KNOW CRACKED.COM — Source

14

Doom

Doom could have been an official Aliens game. DOOM According to John Romero, id Software was offered the license to Aliens. They decided to turn it down, however, as they didn't want to take someone else's directions about what they could and couldn't do. CRACKED.COM — Doom Center (via archive.org)

13

CRACKED.COM one in THRee MILLENIALS SAID THE FIRST THING THEY DO POST-COITAL IS GRAB THeIR PHones. But 28% admitted they really want to check their phones during sex, with 12% saying they usually do. — Source: 25 Bizarre Statistics About Relationships And Sex

12

Francis Ford Coppola's 1982 musical film One From The Heart was backed by the director's own money because he wanted to focus on what he wanted to say instead of becoming Hollywood's hired gun. The film brought six years of financial troubles to Coppola. Не likened the film to a kamikaze attack. CRACKED.COM — Source

11

Anthony Michael Hall

ANTHONY MICHAEL HALL CRACKEDC CONT Film producer Bruce Edwin: He's got a certain magic and power about him with women that is just unbelievable. I me

10

African Birds

The most common bird on Earth is the red-billed quelea. Native to sub-Saharan Afri- ca, these little birds are considered agricultural pests because their mas- sive flocks can obliterate entire crops. There are an estimated 1 to 10 billion queleas. CRACKED NOW YOU KNOW — Audubon

9

Ben Affleck in 'Argo'

writers on screen Argo Ben Affleck Affleck wrote and directed this film, leading to him writing and directing The Batman, and we all know how that went. CRACKED.COM — Source: Wikipedia

8

Composer Eric Sierra "purposely wrote un-singable things" in the operatic song in ‘The Fifth Element.’

The opera song from 'The Fifth Element' was composed to be impossible to actually sing. CRACKED.COM When opera singer Inva Muls came for the part, she sang 85% of what thought was tech- nically impossible, the rest being assembled in the studio. — Traxmag

7

Steven Tyler & Julia Holcomb

Steven Tyler & Julia Holcomb 9 YEARS Holcomb was a 16-year-old fan backstage at an Aerosmith concert when she met Tyler and they started a relationship. Her mother signed over guardianship to Tyler, where he was her legal guardian while they were dating each other. CRACKED.COM — Source: 14 Eyebrow-Arching Celebrity Relationship Age Gaps

6

CRACKEDCO The plot twist finale to Gilmore girls might have worked in 2007, when the show originally ended. I'm pregnant! But in 2016, Rory was in her

5

Independence Day

They made 4,000 or SO miniatures and models for the VFX in Independence Day. into PATILLE mith things think It took nine months to film all the miniature and model footage they needed, and up to four camera crews were filming it at any one time. CRACKED.COM — Source: Vulture

4

Face on Mars

An artist designed the Mars Face-on Earth. In 1947, Isamu Noguchi envisioned a huge earth sculpture intended to be visible from Mars. In 1976, it looked like the Martians had beaten us to the idea. CRACKED.COM — Source

3

Bugs in pop culture Baxter Stockman from Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles A bumbling scientist turned into a bumbling fly-man! While a bit of a joke, he's become a perennial villain to the TMNT throughout several different series and comics. CRACKED.COM — Source

2

Jim Carrey

JIM CARREY CRACKED.COM Carrey was only 18 years old when he auditioned for SNL. Didn't get I N the gig but he was MING quickly hired at LOR — Source

1

The owners of the Breaking Bad house built a six-foot iron fence around it. For years, have been throwing pizzas on the house's roof (to recreate the scene where Bryan Cranston did that), and this was the only family's only remaining option to deal with it. NOW YOU KNOW CRACKED.COM — Source: 13 Now-You-Know Facts About Movies (And Other Cool Stuff)

Tags:

Visual

Scroll down for the next article

Must Read

Movies & TV

35 Random Bits of Pop-Culture Trivia Who Assure Us This Isn’t Even Their Final Form

Movies & TV

29 Bits of TV Trivia We Vacuumed Out From Under the Coffee Table

Trivia & Jokes

32 Out-Of-This-World Bits of Trivia That Somehow Found Their Way Back Into This World

Sports

29 Facts About Sports and Athletes to Make the Jocks Feel Like the Brains of the Operation for Once

Music

30 Bits of Trivia About Music Videos That Have A Two-Minute Scene Before the Beat Drops

Movies & TV

37 Random Bits of Pop-Culture Trivia That Know We Used to Be Pieces of Garbage But Also Know That People Can Change

VIRAL ON CRACKED

1

‘My Dad Would Have Never Quit That Show’: Isaac Hayes III on what ‘South Park’ Meant to His Father

2

The Billionaire Class Has Bought Up All of Media So We Can’t Laugh at Them Anymore

3

15 Details That Movies and Shows Chose to Keep (After They Stopped Making Sense)

4

50 of the Funniest Burns from the Week of July 14, 2025

5

Elmo Drops A Donald Trump Diss Track on ‘The Late Show’ As the White House Targets PBS

I agree to the Terms of Service

Add me to the weekly newsletter

Add me to the daily newsletter

I am AWESOME