32 Wild ‘Well, I’m Getting Fired’ Moments

‘I had the bright idea to shoot off a potato gun in the parking lot of my company’
32 Wild ‘Well, I’m Getting Fired’ Moments

If you know you’re getting fired, you might as well go out with a bang. One Redditor’s dad did exactly that. When he was a busboy at a restaurant, he dropped an entire tub full of dishes when making his way back to the kitchen. All of the dishes fell with a loud crash, and everyone in the restaurant turned to look at him. Knowing he was going to get the boot, he picked up the single dish that didn’t break, held it out at arm’s length and dropped it to the floor. He was fired, but not before everyone applauded him. That’s the way to do it. 

Other Redditors have remembered the times they were sure of an imminent firing, and while not every screwup resulted in a pink slip, we can see why they thought it would. To the guy who threw someone else off a roof — this one’s for you.

Roostergoat 11y ago I was a recreational programmer for a mountain biking camp. We hadn't researched the trail well enough and got all four leaders and all sixteen campers stuck in a bog with their bikes for a couple hours. Managed to get them all out eventually, road around town for a while, then went back to camp. Never head anything about it. 16 ...
JewfroSamurai666 11y ago My supervisor used work construction, and him and another guy were working on a second story roof when the guy pissed off my supervisor, who proceeded to throw him off the roof. When he walked downstairs, his boss met him at the door and said, you know you're fired, right? My supervisor looked at him and siad, yeah I figured that when I threw him down. 36 ...
Jeimaiku 11y ago I forwarded a meeting invite for a client meeting to my boss that said This woman is up my ass and I need some support here because she won't leave me the hell alone until we actually help her. In the end, it turns out it wasn't sent to her, but the format of Outlook makes it look like updated notes about meeting invites go to everyone, and I believed it went to her. I had a full blown panic attack and started sobbing under my desk. 17 ...
aresfiend 11y ago I worked at a paintball field owned by a very religious man and this day we had a group of baptists playing that was mostly 10-14 year old kids. I got a chance to hop in and play at the end of the day, so I did. I ran up the center, got shot in the shoulder, and went to walk back to the deadbox when the kids on my own team lit me up. So what did I do? Yelled JESUS FUCK! I'M ON YOUR TEAM! and threw my gun at the net. I still had
liljetnerd 11y ago When I was younger I worked at small pet shop on the central coast, we sold mainly saltwater and some freshwater fish, also we sold pre mixed saltwater to customers that didn't have time to make their own. One of my tasks was to make sure the betta bowls got clean and the water was changed.We kept a bunch of blue jugs in the back room that were always used for water changes they were usually filled with fresh water so we could top off the fish tanks.So I go about my day like usual and start
Calamity-imminent 11y ago A few years back I was collecting a customers car to deliver to their home on the back of my recovery truck, I'd never driven a car quite so powerful as this before and driving it onto the back of truck gave it a little too much gas, panicked, missed the brake, slipped back onto the accelerator putting the car into the back of the truck cab and causing £4k worth of damage to the truck......and £25k worth of damage to the brand new Aston Martin DB9. 17 ...
trufreedom 11y ago I worked at McDonald's in high school and was on the midnight shift with a very lax manager. We decided to make a prank call... I honestly don't remember the bit but I know I had to call someone that boarded horses. Anyway I forgot to block the store's number. The person I pranked lept calling back every 10 minutes. My manager talked to them and tried to calm them down, but they kept calling until morning until they talked to the store manager. I didn't get fired but I got demoted from my Crew Trainer position,
 11y ago Years ago when I first started at the dealership I now run, I was working in sales. We had this skeevy, doucbag of a lot attendant who went to school with my younger sister. For whatever reason, he was always talking about how he wanted to fuck her and telling me she was a whore. I just ignored it. One day, he caught me at the wrong time and made a smart comment and I beat the living shit out of him right there in teh showroom. Shortly, thereafter, the dealer-prinicipal called me into his office. I
syrinaut 11y ago I worked at a call center and was joking around with a friend of mine. She had just engaged in a relationship with another girl and was complaining that the sex wasn't very good, making jokes, and saying that she wanted to play with her new girlfriend's ass but her girlfriend was having none of it. Off mute, without missing a beat, I just looked my friend and said, So, you like buttplay, do you? And then... slowly... quietly... I hear the customer's voice. You're off mute, just so you know. I went pale. As soon as
blu_rose 11y ago Working as an Executive Assistant to a VP and she asks me to go online and pay a speeding ticket that her son (a grown man, I'll have you know) got. Now, her son is notorious for getting speeding tickets and then she pays a lawyer to contest them because if he plaid guilty and she paid them all they would take away his license. I go online and am not paying attention so instead of clicking just the one ticket to pay I select all (about 4 or 5) of them and proceed to pay them.
snakey_nurse 11y ago Not me, but my coworker. I work at a hotel, and she is in housekeeping. She went in a room to strip it of dirty linen, washed her hands, and left the hot water tap running. 3 rooms were flooded because of that + 141 ...
MuppetHolocaust 11y ago A few years ago I was reading The Road by Cormac McCarthy while on my lunch break. (Highly recommend, btw.) At one point I came across a word I was unfamiliar with; the context in which it was used gave me no clue as to what it could have meant. This was before I had a smartphone, so I wrote the word down and decided to look it up online when I got back to the office. The word was catamite. Wait until you're at home to look it up if you don't know what it is.
 11y ago Edited 11y ago The female chef at my job was - for some reason - allowed to have her eleven year old son running around in the restaurant. Не was the most obnoxious eleven year old you can imagine (and I know they can be obnoxious!), he thought because I was a waiter and his mother was a chef he was my supervisor. One day I had been taking a cup of coffee in the back and I heard customers coming in. I walk through the kitchen to the reception and halfway there the kid runs in to me and
Aumangea 11y ago A client came in, and I confirmed on an old statement the client's personal bank account number. The client waved it away saying it was correct. I thought it was an old statement, so how could we possible have written the wrong bank account number on the statement? Turns out someone had used the statement as a template and changed the account number and saved over the original document. So when I printed it, I was printing an altered document. Client confirmed that as her account number. I transferred hundreds of thousands of dollars into a random
sleepingsun 11y ago Elbowed a kid in the face and burst his nose. I'm rather tall (6ft 5), and the kid had wandered up behind me to ask a question. I turned around, and his face happened to be on the perfect level for my elbow to make contact with it. + 203 ...
shakey_bakey 11y ago So, I work at a bank. Within my first two weeks, I left my money out. Now, normally, if the drawer was locked, it wouldn't be a big deal. But I didn't do that. I just left a pile of cash (roughly valued at $20,000) in two drawers out for an entire fucking weekend. And nobody found it, from Friday morning, to Monday evening. + 218 ...
catchafire678 11y ago Well, this was actually kind of funny. I was hoping I didn't get fired, and no one confronted me because it was not REALLY my fault. I lived in fear of the day people would finally notice though. My company came around the call center and took pictures of people in their everyday lives in order to put on our website. Well, me being cheery and dressed in a cute dress that day, I somehow managed to be on the front of our website as the face of our company. We have a few hundred thousand visitors
 11y ago Worked at a pet-store, manager asked me to move a koi from one tank to another. Big giant 100$ koi, rips through the net, lands head first on the ground and flops twice before dying. Manager and I made eye contact and all he said was: That's the first one I bought when I started the store. His name was patches.  Не went into the office and gently closed the door. I grabbed my jacket, waved to the others and left. + 3.1K ...
taekwondogirl 11y ago My dad has a great one. Не was a busboy at a restaurant, and it was his first day on the job. The place was packed, and he was rushing back with a ton of dishes. Somehow the tray to carry them fell and all of the dishes fell to the floor with a loud crash. Everyone looked over at my dad. My dad saw that there was one lone dish intact, picked it up, held it out at arm's length, then dropped it. It broke. Everyone in the restaurant applauded. Не was then fired. 2.1K ...
JordanSM 11y ago Threw a staple gun onto the counter. It bounced up and smashed a hole though the monitor at my workstation. Was fired the next day. 801 ...
cmlglrslcrd 11y ago I worked as a media buyer and on my third day on the job my boss asked me to find some information and update the (huge) spreadsheet he was working for the client's annual plan. As I was about to update it, he opened the file to finish a few things and asked me to wait. Now I'm the new girl, wanting to show service. I decide to open a copy of the spreadsheet and update it there, so when he finishes I know where it goes. Не finishes, lets me know I can open the file,
RageCageRunner 11y ago Edited 11y ago I use Adium to manage my IMs while I'm at work. I'm a developer. I was speaking to a project manager at a new job. I'd been there for maybe a month. She was asking me to do some tedious work that was completely unnecessary because they promised it to a client. While frustrated, I tabbed over to my girlfriend's IM to complain how frustrated I was that they were making us do all this work for basically nothing. Unfortunately, I didn't tab over. I sent the IM to the PM. My heart sunk
hawkeye1200 11y ago Edited 11y ago In high school I worked at an AM radio station in my small town on Sunday mornings. I was the only person there from 6AM to noon. It was mostly reading the weather and playing pre-taped programs. At one point I play a live broadcast of a Catholic mass going on. During that time I would crawl into a ball in the break room couch and doze off, hungover from the night before. One Sunday I wake up to, Hawkeye1200! You can't sleep on the job! I sit up and see the boss who
 11y ago I work in a furniture store, mainly in the warehouse. We sell EXPENSIVE shit. Like, the cheapest lamp you'll find is $100, and that's because it is damaged slightly. We had received a shipment of a very expensive set, all for a model home we were staging. I had a china cabinet, still boxed, on our forklift. It was set on a pallet upright on its side, so that it was very tall and not very wide. I was bringing it into the warehouse, being super careful. Well, we have a sunken manhole right in front of
 11y ago Edited 11y ago Worked at Taco Bell. Background: people generally consider me very mild tempered and kind. One night was particularly stressful. It wasn't unusual for us to kind of beat on the touch screens a bit but got mad and punched one. Mind you, it wasn't a full blown omg-punch. It was more like if your buddy made fun of you and you kinda annoyingly punched his shoulder. The screen shattered and the touch screen but started ringing up hundreds of (coincidentally) Fruit Punches. The girl working next to me saw the screen shatter and saw
MrWhytie 11y ago I'm a medical equipment repair technician. One night I was working on a exam light that was hanging from the ceiling in an operating room. I had a bit of it apart and was inspecting the connection between the big light head and the arm that it was suspended from when a clip popped out. The light head dropped to the floor. The arm is spring loaded and it shot up and shattered the ceiling and 5 or 6 lights showering the operating table, anesthesia cart and myself in ceiling tile, plastic and glass. At first I
goalieamd 11y ago I was working at a Cosi (sandwich, soup and salad place) and had asked to leave early the previous day since my uncle died. I went to back to work and was still in a state of shock and couldn't check my baggage at the door. I had this horribly bitchy lady change her order 4 times during the lunch rush when I had a line out the door. I couldn't take it anymore and told her to either order or to the get the fuck out of my line. My manager heard me, before he could
agreenster 11y ago I worked at an automotive parts manufacturing factory while going to art college, and part of my job was boxing up parts and attaching a tag onto the box with thin wire. But for every box I completed (one every couple hours) I sculpted a little animal out of the wire with needle nose pliers. I gave the little sculptures (bears, rabbits, whatever) to random employees, which they left on their workstation. One day as I was making one of the little sculptures, I looked over my right shoulder to see my supervisor standing directly behind me
ForsakenDrunk 11y ago I worked at a movie theater in high school. I'm blind in one eye and used to be sensitive about it. Got in an argument with a co-worker at the theater, but didn't really think anything of it. Later on, I was going down the hall to get more ice, and passed him as he was tearing tickets for customers. Не muttered cyclops as i passed just loud enough for me to hear....so i immediately turned around and punched him in the face in front of his line of customers. Never saw managers run so fast. +
 11y ago Edited 11y ago I had the bright idea to shoot off a Potato Gun in the parking lot of my company. I fired a few rounds across the road when the maintance manager came running out screaming at me. I then realized I was shooting a firearm on company property (doesn't matter its potatoes and right guard, it is still a projectile). My fellow supervisors who were watching all disappeared. Went back to my desk to await my manager. All I got was a I trust this will not happen again e-mail. Still work for the company
vilent_sibrate 11y ago Edited 11y ago I worked for a small computer company doing a couple million a year in sales. One of my tasks was to update price listings and have those changes reflect on our vendors' websites. I put one less 0 on one computer model and ended up costing our company $30,000 in about one day. Someone had noticed the error and bought a shit ton of computers. Even though there was a QA process to catch these things after me, I knew I was getting fired.
kathleenkathy 11y ago A customer high fived my vagina so I slapped him so hard his sunglasses broke. I thought I was going to get punished at least but nothing was ever said to me. 16 ...

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