23 Wild Honeymoon Stories

‘They rented Anne of Green Gables’
23 Wild Honeymoon Stories

The honeymoon phase couldn’t be any more horny. Because of this, people who work in honeymoon hotspots have epic tales of stuff like seeing hotel guests covered in cuts and bruises “because they were having sex on a balcony and fell off.” But it can be funny, too. 

To that end, plenty of Redditors have gasped and laughed at the things they’ve witnessed people do while they were on their honeymoons, including one couple who returned to their honeymoon resort five years after their nuptials and uncovered an artifact from their wedding night.

 8y ago I had drunk sex with my wife's mom. 3 ...
angami 11y ago My husband is Indian and I am a U.S. citizen and we live in India. I have a tourist visa and therefore have to leave the country every six months and could not return to India for 60 days! So, we timed our honeymoon to Nepal to coincide with my need to leave the country. We planned for me to apply for a different visa in Nepal so that I could return within two weeks. Unfortunately, we did not have the proper stamps and signatures on our marriage certificate so during our honeymoon my husband had to
ColinAllCarz 13y ago Our cruise ship said they had no record of the money we put on account with them, our room smelled like someone wiped their tush with it (they couldn't switch us), the couple at our required evening dining table had recently divorced but went on the trip anyway, and a homeless guy chased us at one of our ports. We had to laugh. 1 ...
OinkOinkthenMoo 13y ago My dad and his first wife had a nice honeymoon at some fancy resort. Apparently, 5 years later on their anniversary they went back to rekindle the romance and booked the same room. They requested some raunchy VHS tapes to get them into the mood. As they popped one in, they couldn't help but feel that the room was a bit...familiar, shall we say? Unbelievably, it was the very room they were in, albeit decorated differently. It didn't take long for them to realize that the people banging away on the bed were actually them and the
laidymondegreen 12y ago We went on a cruise for our honeymoon (we got married in December and only had about $1,000 for a honeymoon, so that seemed the best choice even though we knew we weren't really cruise people). The only thing we were really super excited about on the cruise was an excursion to a nature park that I had been to before which is one of my favorite places on the planet. I woke up the night before the excursion and felt completely terrible. By the morning, I had a fever of 103, and couldn't sit up without
carolynroberta 10y ago My husband's grandparents own a beach house and offered to let us honeymoon there. I assumed they'd be staying at one of their other 4 homes. Nope. They stayed at the beach house. And invited the rest of the family. Aunts, uncles, cousins, everyone. Over 20 people in a 3 bedroom beach house. For a week. When I suggested we just go rent a motel room for the week, my husband freaked out because we might offend someone. Sure enough, when we left to merely go for a walk on the beach, multiple people flipped out because
cepheid22 9y ago We went to Jamaica. We stayed at an all- inclusive resort. The first day we were there hubby ate something I did not eat. Не got sick. For the entire trip. Other people got sick, too. I later learned they brought in the health officials trying to determine what made all these guests sick. It turns out they served unripened fruit (I cannot remember the name!). They offered us a few free days if we came back. I laughed at them. They ruined our first trip out of the US. However, we met the best cab driver
araw 11y ago . Edited 11y ago Well, we found out about her mild LATEX ALLERGY! No joke. Also, no one told my wife to pee after sex, so we got to go to the ER on our honeymoon for a kidney infection. Other than that, it was super duper.
TheGreenShepherd 10y ago Male Pretty bad. We took a cruise to Mexico (Pacific side) and got caught in a hurricane. On the first port, my wife got the worst sunburn I've ever seen, and I spent the entire time coating her in aloe and peeling sheets of dead skin off of her. The food on the cruise was atrocious, the portions were small, and the waiters turned their noses up at us even if we asked for more. To make things worse, my wife and I waited for the wedding night and things did not go smoothly. At all. 3
imrightandyournot 10y ago my first marriage was back in 1987 , we were both 20. Barely enough money for food and rent , you know the drill. We went on a honeymoon to a resort location nearby in a hotel . They gave us a room right next to the door leading to the indoor pool area . we checked into our room and I did the whole carry over the threshold thing and we got busy pretty fast . clothes piled on floor and us naked going at it athletic sweaty sex then i heard a noise and looked toward the door and
 . 10y ago Not an employee of a hotel or anything but a volunteer firefighter/EMT. One time, a honeymooner couple (this is common, I live right outside the city in a very artsy fartsy famous town) had been drinking exuberantly and had been experimenting with drugs, this lead to getting naked in public,which lead to sexual acts in public..which were interrupted by the bloody screams of the man who was screaming and howling in pain that his flesh was ON FIRE, he rolled around on the floor scratching at his ass and sack begging for us to pour water
 10y ago I had just finished teaching newly weds how to ballroom dance. I saw the gent had a hickie on his neck so made a joke about it. Bad move. They had a fight and he stormed off leaving her crumpled in a heap on the dancefloor. I tried to console her the best I could but it was fucked. She was waaaay out of his league anyway. One other shitty note I remember was that the girl I had for my next lesson saw the whole thing (everybody did) and was tapping her watch at me. 242
9_inch_polar_bear e 10y ago Edited 10y ago I worked at a resort on Vancouver island, we also rented houses to families, this one couple on their honeymoon rented a 3 story house in the summer. They looked like a normal pair of people but shit I was wrong. Checking the house a week later to make sure they left, the woman had stuck used tampons in the drains and smeared blood on the walls, there were holes in every door and most walls, tv was smashed. Everything went wrong.
 10y ago A Christian couple I know had never had sex before their wedding night. The guy wanted to break the ice so he got naked while his bride was in the suite bathroom on their honeymoon. Не spread eagle and aimed his butt towards the bathroom door. His bride comes out and he rips a fart, but shit came out. Не shit the bed and she locked herself in the bathroom for 7 hours crying. They're fine now but she wanted a divorce that night. 2.1K Share ...
joe_m107 10y ago Edited 10y ago I frequent a natural hot springs in Alaska that has a high influx of Asian tourists and newlyweds during wintertime. The hot springs create huge steam clouds that make the visibility very low while wading in the waist high water. Apparently, the newlyweds from Japan (I think) believe that consummating their marriage under the Northern Lights will give them a male child. So, they go to the hot springs in the middle of winter when it's dark outside and have sex in the water. It's really weird to be there, wading around, and accidentally
morethantitanium 10y ago One time in the LAX airport, I saw a couple vehemently arguing and making accusations of fault about seat changes, flight plans, etc., all the way up to the boarding pass counter. Then, when they got up to the counter, they explained politely and cheerfully to the flight attendant that they were on their way to their honeymoon and needed to check their seats. Share 781 ...
SoCalGorilla 10y ago Got married in Hawaii, staying at a swanky resort, late one afternoon my wife was getting out of the shower, and I had boxers on lying in bed after a long day at the beach, when out of nowhere I hear the front door opening up, I thought it was my wife, and she thought it was me, but in walks a couple with luggage and key card in their hand asking what we are doing in their room... Needless to say, we were upgraded to an ocean front suite for the rest of our stay due
fellchieftan 10y ago I live in Las Vegas, and I used to work in one of the major casinos on the strip. One night in one of our clubs during a wedding reception one of my employees let me know that he had heard multiple people in a bathroom stall. The stalls had full doors so you couldn't see feet, but you could definitely hear some debauchery going on. I called security and they ask the people to open the door. Soooo...out comes a groomsman, followed by the bride....followed by the best man....followed by the groom....all half naked. They proceed
buzzzzt 10y ago I was in Mexico with my mother and sister. As we were walking down an outdoor path in the resort, we saw and young girl crying and her boyfriend walking behind her frantic. They were both covered in cuts and bruises, surrounded by security and medical and of course on their honeymoon. I asked one of the staff what happened. The couple was having sex on their balcony and fell off! Apparently not too high off the ground, but hight enough to be beaten and shook up.
Earl_of_Coffee 10y ago In high school I lived in a tourist town and worked at a video store. One night a Mennonite couple came in and mentioned they were on their honeymoon. They rented Anne of Green Gables. 3.4K Share ...
eurtoast 10y ago . Edited 10y ago don't know why, but the maid decided to bust in two hours before check out. Me and the woman were mid doggystyle and she (not the maid) shot under the blankets so fast I was literally there with my dick in hand
Billorama 9 10y ago . Edited 10y ago I'm currently on my honeymoon in Delhi, India, we are from Northern Ireland so not used to the diet. My new wife just vomited at the side of the road, and it's my birthday.
 8y ago The third night I had a panic attack because of how fast everything was changing and I said I wanted to go home. My husband thought that was really ungrateful as he'd been looking so forward to the trip and planned a lot of it. We had a big fight and he just drove away from the bed and breakfast, didn't tell me where he was going. It was before cell phones, so for all I knew he'd gone home without me. Не came back about two hours later with Taco Bell. We talked everything through while

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