12 Trivia Tidbits for Monday, May 13, 2024
These are the only facts you get to learn today. So if you learn them all in one go, you’re gonna be so extremely bored and dumb by the end of the day.
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The Oldest Known Ancestor of the Horse
Scientists found fossilized evidence of what is likely an ancestor of every living hoofed animal, a 65-million-year-old chinchilla-esque little dude from Colorado.
The Swiss Army Knife Is Ditching the Knife Part
The company that makes the Swiss Army Knife, Victorinox is producing a new knifeless “Swiss Army Tool,” because traditional versions of their products aren’t allowed, like, anywhere, and they want to get back in the pockets of pilots and schoolchildren, like the good old days.
Robot Dogs With A.I. Rifles
The U.S. Marines are using A.I. algorithms to train those robot dogs to shoot guns. Some other company is training them to balance on a big inflatable ball. We’re all going to be murdered by a robotic circus army, and we’re all going to deserve it.
We’re Pretty Close to Being Able to Grow Teeth
A major oversight in the design of the human body is that you lose the ability to grow teeth when you’re a little kid. But scientists at the Kyoto University Hospital are testing out a “tooth regrowth medicine” on humans for the first time, after successful tests in ferrets.
Synthetic Hallucinogenic Toad Slime May Fix Your Anxiety
Scientists have developed a synthetic version of the venom of the Colorado River toad, which, in nature, makes you trip absolute balls. The boring lab-made version doesn’t induce hallucinations, but may be effective in treating anxiety and depression.
Rich People Are Using IV Drips to Cure Jet Lag
An IV drip is a great, if expensive, way to cure a hangover. And high-end hotels are starting to offer spa-quality IV drips to cater to rich turds on the move.
The Story Behind RFK Jr.’s Brain Worm Is Somehow Worse Than It Sounds
RFK Jr. was getting his brain examined in 2012 because he was going through divorce proceedings, and argued that his diminished cognitive abilities prevented him from holding a job, and that he therefore shouldn’t have to pay alimony. Don’t worry, doctors concluded his brain fog was due to mercury poisoning, not the brain worm. This is the guy the Mighty Mighty Bosstones broke up over?!?!
Utah’s New NHL Team Is Close to Picking a Name
The owner of the team dropped 20 options to vote from, including the Utah Powder, the Utah Caribou, the Utah Yeti (yes!) and the Utah HC (what?!).
Philadelphia’s 24-Hour Knife Vending Machine
Perrystead Dairy has installed the city’s first round-the-clock cheese vending machine on their property. It currently dispenses a bunch of different cheeses, plus meats and other charcuterie goods, but the owners want to press their luck and get some cheese knives in there soon, too.
A PR Mogul Publicly Related Herself Out of a Job
Qu Jing was head of PR at gigantic Chinese tech company Baidu, but she just lost her job for being a tremendously out-of-touch grindset loser. She previously bragged that she forgot how old her sons were, and more recently called for the normalization of 50-day business trips and 24-hour workdays.
Cops Statistically Prefer to Ticket Foreign Cars
A study of over four million insurance applications found that the top 10 most-ticketed brands are almost all from Germany, Japan and South Korea. Infiniti, Scion and Volkswagen owners are the three biggest victims.
Some Poor Lady Somehow Started Beef With 10 Percent of an Endangered Species
In 2021, there were only 200 wild California condors in the world, and 20 of them would routinely visit this one woman’s house, and raise absolute hell on her roof and deck.
