29 of the Funniest Tweets from Monday, April 29, 2024

Should be totally fine!
29 of the Funniest Tweets from Monday, April 29, 2024

Welcome to Aguascalientes. After successfully jumpstarting one struggling Welsh soccer club, Ryan Reynolds and Rob McElhenney are hoping for much of the same with a beloved Mexican franchise. The Deadpool star and Always Sunny co-creator purchased a stake in Club Necaxa, the century-old Mexican soccer team that already boasts Eva Longoria as one of its owners. Variety reports that investors hope bringing the duo into the fold will help grow the club’s profile in international play. Reynolds and McElhenney’s process of creating a Cinderella story out of a team that was “mismanaged to the point of near collapse” was widely documented on FX’s Emmy-winning docuseries Welcome to Wrexham, the third season of which is set to premiere this week.

Although Peacock is the home to critically-acclaimed series like Poker Face, the streamer is also capitalizing on the demand for live sports. Per The Hollywood Reporter, new and existing Peacock customers can expect to see a $2 per month increase for its Premium & Premium Plus subscriptions ahead of the upcoming Summer Olympics in Paris. This will be the NBCUniversal streamer’s second price hike in two years in an attempt to herd viewers to a centralized location for watching all things swimming and gymnastics this summer. 

Thankfully, there’s no price-gouging on the timeline, and the hilarious tweets are free for everyone. Today’s funniest ones include those about the otter who could give Stevie Wonder a run for his money, a seagull with some chompers and a dog who almost certainly knows all the tea.

Fesshole @fesshole 19h FESS HOLE When I was a young boy I shat myself quite spectacularly in the middle of assembly. Went back to my old village last night; as I walked in the pub a bloke shouted out 'oi Shitter!'. I'm 63 and haven't been there for over 45 years. 130 561 20.2K del 1M
elle @ellegist 22h ... nobody else is doing it like the menswear guy Gurtrock @gurtrock 14h I blocked you from the original post. I'm sorry you have to live that way. 8 25 del 181K derek guy @dieworkwear 14h Twitter's programmers have made it so that I can break through blocks and still reply. I am replying now so that the algo will also serve my content onto your timeline for the rest of your life. 52 107 8.7K 187K 16 566 14.8K 320K
OSCAR @now_thats_oscar- 5h top 10 scariest images of all time WITH ORIGINAL SONGS BY LIN-MANUEL MIRANDA DiscussingFilm @Discus... 5h DF The first trailer for Barry Jenkins' 'MUFASA: THE EASA TRAI LION KING' has been 1:38 released.... 40 741 11.3K 504K
Cody @AltHistCody 21h This was that brief moment when tech was cool before it became all dystopian and hellish Nostalgia @NostalgiaFoL... 1d Apple Silhouette Campaign (2004-2008) 174 12.2K 167K 4.8M
lilly pulitzer prize @eviIcherub.20h ... WiiSports lilly pulitzer prize @eviIche... 1d if i still had a wii i would make the challengers boys miis and make them play wii sports tennis against each other 44 8,971 120K 2.8M
emily @emilykmay 20h i got on threads for two seconds and wow there really is a place more annoying than twitter Me @ my cis guy coworker: Did you like Taylor Swift's new album? Him, with a smile: I don't really listen to Taylor Swift Men will smile at you because they're proud of their toxic masculinity and in that moment I felt a glimmer of misogyny, along with hurt because I love her To mask how I felt, I said oh no that's totally fine, I don't expect everyone to love her. I think her new aibum is really
Shoulders @captainrylz 1d My parents & I used to watch movies together all the time, but after the Saltburn incident, the tradition died. I've been trying to break the awkward tension for a while & we finally got tix to see our first movie in months. This one should be safe enough. It's just about tennis 63 1,935 56.3K del 1.7M
Ben Crew @BenjaminCrew1-3 3h ... Rosemary's Baby works because there are scary concepts besides Satanism in it like What if your neighbors were annoying? and What if you wore a cool outfit and no one cared. 16 181 1,344 46.7K
Lil Bit @LizerReal. 22h The restaurant labeled my 7yo's take out chicken fingers as ... kids finger and now she's running around the house maniacally laughing and saying deeeelicious kids fingers mmmm as she eats them oh no KIDS FINGER earthchoice® 35 725 19.8K 226K
chips dubbo @gooch_pube .20h ... getting back into dating apps You liked Jess's photo. Today 2:12pm Start the chat with Jess i love you 42 1,377 24.4K 807K
kramerica industries @hepimp 3h ... I finished an email with 'any issues, please just get in touch to discuss' and they got in touch to discuss. umbro OD bets WOO bet P .co.uk nier gue T OF ST LONDO The Center University FULLERS LONDON PRIDE 20 969 18.7K del 352K
@NourFarouk1 19h grabbing dinner W ur friend is like omg these fries r epic. also I cried myself to sleep last night. Can u pass the ketchup. You won't believe who's crawled back into my DMs. Are are you down to try this new spot tom? I hate him. The weather was so nice today 219 13.4K 84.6K 2.3M
rosey @thechosenberg. dd ... Dudes rock moment III NATIONAL POST News / Canada A man thought it was a good idea to take a 'sip' of his friend's assisted suicide cocktail After his terminally ill friend described the preparation as bitter, 'this patient ingested an unknown- sized 'sip' of the preparation Published Oct 03, 2023 Last updated Oct 03, 2023 177 2,900 71.8K 5.1M
Your OG @LRNROSE. 17h anyways yall. i i just did something ive always wanted to do. i just walked up to people bbqing at the park and said hey yall. sorry im late and faked like i was about to get a plate. then i said yall im just joking. yall dk me and everyone laughed and offered me a plate 4real 24 1,139 23.2K du 536K
Paul Bronks @SlenderSherbet 9 9h ... You probably can't even tell but a little bit of the door fell off when you were out 59 432 7,936 287K
hil @plume__ 1d ... look at the unbelievable soulfulness of his eyes. he's really playing the piano 6,308 likes kotsumate_otter Otter in concert 28 1,884 26.1K 630K
good reddit @GoodReddit - 1d ... r/notinteresting u/harolf999. 3h Straight banana 536 11K 168K 4.9M
AB @Abeale202.22h Toddler meltdown because I cut his meatball. 685 1,058 22.8K 995K
nthang @niyalewinsky.18h this messy ass dog 387 6,247 80.6K 2M
brecht apologist @madisontayt_. 1d ... every single time i use my oven my i remember that story of the girl being over at a guy's house and him baking something for her and saving i hate this part before sticking his bare hands in to pull it out 62 2,469 67.1K 2.5M
shiba ennui @TomSchally 23h ... N I'm unemployed at heart, and no job will ГСС ever change that. 17 3,381 17K 541K
callie actually @eggshellfriend· 1d ... throwback to when the secret service came to my house and asked me what I meant by this callie actually @eggsh... 7/4/22 Boyfriend got a sunburn 70 4,778 108K del 2.4M
Stuart Antony @STU_ACTOR5h ... If anyone has lost some false teeth ive just seen a seagull with them, it flew off in the direction of Covent Garden about 10 minutes ago! Hope this is helpful! 59 330 1,837 60.8K
OBEY @cryst6l . 2 21h high asf and this pic is killing me 47 1,112 20K 436K
the mirthmaster @trevorcrumbo· . 1d ... yoooo they got all the gooch brothers on this one PAOL MORRIS MARK GOVER HOD Painter ALAN GOOCH Supervising Painters LARRY GOOCH LIAM GOOCH Chargehand Painters AARON GOOCH TONY OSMOND ~ SEAN UCCIAC 48 2,605 41.7K del 1M
KNOX @knoxdotmp3.20h who is this diva! she look like she got tea 69 2,447 25.7K 677K
Vernal Eggcelent 1d ... So is she gonna be Zendaya Holland or is he going to become Tom The Hollywood Handle 3d Tom Holland and Zendaya are reportedly planning marriage. (Via: people.com/zendaya-tom-ho...) 617 36.3K 559K 15.2M
PewPewPew @pewcubed 1d Turns out they have Dunkin' in hell. REAGAN RUNS ON DUNKIN. SOMETHING STEADY FRESH IS ALWAYS BREWING 29 1,392 19.6K 461K
lucy bitchin' camaro @nicot... 17h ... you tell em, buddy! proud of you for speaking your mind. how was kindergarten today zon @NoMoreZon· 3d Put any of this shit on a burger and we gon have a problem 346 13.2K 246K 5.9M

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