35 of the Funniest Tweets from Wednesday, April 10, 2024

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35 of the Funniest Tweets from Wednesday, April 10, 2024

While legendary directors like John Waters and Francis Ford Coppola struggle to get their latest cinematic ventures off the ground, Maude Apatow has revealed the one easy hack to get any movie made: nepotism. The daughter of Judd Apatow and Leslie Mann is set to make her directorial debut with Poetic License, a film about two best friends vying for the affection of the same middle-aged woman. The coming-of-age movie, which sounds like something straight out of the Judd Apatow oeuvre, will be the first film produced under the Euphoria star’s new production company Jewelbox Pictures, which will look to develop “bold and complex human stories.”

Speaking of legendary directors, ever wonder what they think about when they’re casting for blockbusters? In the case of Furiosa, Anya Taylor-Joy found herself in the titular role because George Miller thought she was the type of person he would hang out with during a hypothetical apocalypse. Miller, Taylor-Joy and Chris Hemsworth took to the CinemaCon stage to preview the Warner Bros. film ahead of its May release. Taylor-Joy described it as “one woman’s commitment to unrelenting hope,” while Hemsworth created a “twisted, cruel and charming” amalgamation of the world’s most infamous dictators for his antagonist Dr. Dementus.

Over on the timeline, the legendary posters are keeping the timeline fresh with their comedy. Today’s funniest tweets include those about a small talker’s nightmare, an unsettling truth about raisins and a place where guys can get the snip as they listen to Taylor Swift.

annalise @annadeathbed -1 17h where we goin tonight $0.06 Available balance $0.06 ? $0.06 ? 156 2,420 19K 518K
Mollie Goodfellow @hansmoll... 5h ... Do you know who had all these things? Patrick Bateman holistic mami @LeAri... 1d my hot take is i don't think anybody should be dating until their shit is together. eating healthy, working out regularly, having a morning routine, a spiritual practice, a therapist, finan... 14 126 1,745 81.8K
Liz Charboneau @lizchar1 18h Air and Space Museum should have a plane emergency slide you can go down just to get to experience it 39 1,098 25.4K 609K
That bitch with the bacon tat... 15h ... Raisins are grape jerky 31 332 2,540 76.8K
Paul Watson @paul_c_watson8h ... Met a guy who said he worked for Deloitte, just moved back from Istanbul office, so, naturally, I barked 'Turkish Deloitte!' Nothing. I said: 'you probably get that a lot' and he just said not really. Beginning to worry I'm not good at small talk. 40 227 7,656 298K
Cullen Crawford @HelloCullen20h ... a bot just dropped a weapons grade pickup line in my message requests Wendy mac @Wendymac22.1d x Hello top G و , are you ready to escape from matrix. Silver oilve 20 6 218 2,594 du 55.3K
Reb @rebtool.5h ... When you get your vasectomy at the Eras Tour NEWS Menu N. Ireland N. Ireland Politics Local News Vasectomies: GPs to resume procedures in Northern Ireland L 46 minutes ago VASECTOM VASECTOM YY GETTY IMAGES 157 4,838 96.6K
yasmin @ycsm1n 1d considering deleting twitter and having my friend recap the timeline for me like it's the daily paper ... ............ 2 1 I | i de ! I ] I | / I | | / I I I I I di C ة J. DER Dr O 61g 3.6M 113K 10K 168
Tom Reagan's Hat @RufusTSuperfly 21h ... 'We saw you across the room and really like...look, let's cut to the chase - can you help fund our movies?' 13 214 1.7K 62K
timothée inshallahmet @l0tswife. 3h ... snow white: blizzy mcguire @blizzy_mcguire 4h I am in an open relationship with 7 gay men 26 270 8.3K
alice (rebirth spoilers) @AerithsSeat 18h The effects of this film are much scarier than the first movies controversy instead of incels it'll turn the young boys into theater kids JOKER Joker Movie @jokermovie. 18h He's not alone anymore. Joker: Folie à Deux-only in theaters and @IMAX, October 4. #JokerMovie #FilmedForlMAX CC 1:35 37 2.3K 30K 973K
Lizzie Logan @lizzzzzielogan 1d Elle got the murder charge against her client dismissed and Atticus's client was convicted, so Jude @TopSecretNoam : 2d To Kill a Mocking Bird is losing by Gavin Bena numbers to Legally Blond as the best legal movie on Harvard Law School's IG story. YOUR VOTE: To Kill a 14% Mockingbird Legally Blonde 86% (2001) 25 2.1K 30K 1M
marina 4/7 @marinadovexo . 1d should call them 82 1.7K 625K 15K
femcel elaine benes @probablyalissa 1d If I had a boyfriend I would bring him here 22 21 18K 400
Dopey The Dumbfuck @pete_rons87206.21h ... every friend group has a guy like this in it 21 330 2.1K 79K
its upsetting me and my home... 1d ... i give homeless ppl money IDGAF what dey buy ayy turn uppppp 109 7,909 29.4K 992K

Image provided by Cracked

plantydirt @plantydirt 19h ... I walked past one of the exec's offices and he was like yo come here for a sec you like old consoles right? and handed me this Microsoft Num Lock g PgUp в 2 Home S Enter A PaDin - 2 - End o test 174 996 37.3K 840K
Homa Bash @HomaBashNews s.19h ... showed up to my story at a Buddhist temple accidentally dressed like a monk today and the monk thought this was the funniest thing ever so now we have 3000 photos to prove he wore it better. i love my job. 49 2,156 37.9K 658K
JIM @jtp2106.20h They finally got rid of the covid spacing decals in my office and now it looks like someone got raptured 55 7,069 136K 1.6M
Nate @thenatewolf-1 14h ... Me: Imagine if every tear was an egg and every time you started crying there was 10-50 broken eggs on you. You leave a funeral and it's like crunch crunch crunch (if the person was beloved). Genie: That's your wish? Me: No, we're just talking. Just being Friends right now. 18 1,668 23.4K 525K
@chinesegon 13h gon ... signing it and pretending nothing happened gang rise up Tech Industry 1d New - yeetty Recruiter sent a mistake in the offer letter, should I correct them? So my salary was supposed to be $100,043 but I'm pretty sure the recruiter made a typo and it says $190,043. Should | say anything? % Get access to Blind's TC database 16 62 Share 98 1,466 48K 2.2M
Patrick Monahan @pattymo.16h ... Just saw a video (won't reshare it here, too scary) of the Joker laughing, even though it's raining. What is with this guy 24 644 12.3K 443K
kc @powcampsurvivor-12h calling everyone i've hooked up with to tell them they need to get tested for the pharaoh's curse 4 375 2,981 del 65.2K
Arturo Torres @arturodraws 18h ... I saw this on ig so now you also have to see it. 86 2,234 28.9K 1M
President Of Physical Media 21h ... Someone just returned a rear projection tv from 2002 at Costco COSTCO WHOLESALE EXECUTIVE MEMBER Executive $120 I was - - Jowo 167 498 6,295 288K
Alison @TradWife2049.20h *jk rowling inventing the word muggle* let's start strong with two g's in the middle 82 1,860 38.8K du 1.7M
Your OG @LRNROSE 22h ... just asked my neighbor when did he and his gf move here and he gon say how u know i got a gf? meanwhile this is the dog he was walking when i asked this 6 134 976 31.6K
kira @kirawontmiss•3 3h Jeff bezos created amazon with just $300,000 from his parents. Taylor swift turned into a musical star by simple networking with her dad who gave her label $300,000. You don't have $300,000. give up. 308 4,445 58K - 1.4M
@endofloves.2 23h spent too long reading this like damn what goes on in modern family chuck @tenetyaoi 1d i literally think about this every single day Page 2 1 MS. DUNPHY: Who were the other 2 Republicans who are celebrities? 3 MR. GIULIANI: Ain't too many. Brad -- 4 not Brad Pitt. The other guy that looks like 5 him. 6 MS. DUNPHY: Bradley Cooper? 7 MR. GIULIANI: No, the other one. What 8 the hell's his name? 9 MS. DUNPHY: Well, Matt Damon is very 10 liberal. 11 MR. GIULIANI: No, Matt Damon is a -- 12 Matt Damon is a fag.
No Context Brits @NoConte... 9h ... Manchester VIA HEATHROW KA BIRMINGHAM 8 meg Bussy the Vampire Slayer 54268 YY65 VXK 47 364 6,492 289K
we deserve more. @ @untypoed 19h ... Y'all look at this bot's profile picture Teena Phipps @PhippsTeen... 1d should i have a party? i'm not a party person but... i wanna have fun and entertain people!! i haven't done this in a while and i'm really craving it 259 6,590 82.5K 2.6M
John Мое @johnmoe.2 22h ... Because I never explained otherwise, my son spent a good stretch of time in his childhood thinking that a vice principal at a school was there in case the principal was assassinated. 92 3,456 66.1K 1.5M
Tyrone Bryant @Carolinas_942.1d ... SPEAK TO A REPRESENTATIVE!!!! seriuslynothing @serius... 2d What is the smallest inconvenience that can ruin your day?? 128 10.6K 45.1K 1.9M
Tió Bobby @6ixBob.21h ... Trick question. I'm not eating anywhere where the mac and cheese looks like that h @easterngoblin 1d Whats your first bite 688 4,495 37.9K 2.3M
fraser ramon @SteveMerkle9 - 1 15h ... likely injury to happen to a greek person Bones @Boness305.15h Giannis Antetokounmpo is grabbing his Achilles and went to the locker room oh no GET TIPE CC EVERYONE'S GAME ANTETOKAD BOS 58 3:37 0:08 x MIL 73 3RD 10 5,053 89.8K 3.1M

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