24 of the Funniest Tweets from December 15, 2023

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24 of the Funniest Tweets from December 15, 2023

Looks like Adam Sandler is remembering that he’s quite the prolific actor when he wants to be. The Sandman is pushing his Murder Mystery aside for something that will likely be a lot more Punch-Drunk Love than Jack and Jill as he’s set to reunite with The Meyerowitz Stories director Noah Baumbach for a new project. While plot details are still under wraps, the basic premise is described as a “funny and emotional coming-of-age movie about adults.” Another of those aforementioned adults in the picture? Oscar-winning actor George Clooney. The movie will be headed straight to Netflix thanks to the Marriage Story director’s deal with the streamer, which was also home to his most recent solo venture White Noise

As we await the Baumbach/Sander/Clooney team-up, another much-talked-about movie starts streaming next week: Bradley Cooper’s Maestro. Given that it’s awards season, we’ve heard contenders talk about just about anything that will fill airtime. Case in point: Cooper’s “no chairs rule.” During Variety’s Directors on Directors, Cooper explained to Spike Lee that when he’s taking on directing duties, “there’s no chairs” because the “energy dips the minute you sit down in a chair.” An ever-kind man, Cooper does at least offer his cast and crew an apple box for their lower-back woes. 

All the while, the timeline has blessed us with a new batch of hysterical tweets. Today’s funniest include those about how to care for a friend with anxiety, the male tramp stamp and the dangers of moving to Oregon. 

Tommy Strong @SlimWyldNRe... 4h ... Bout to get mesothelioma That Girl @B_only1.... 1d Want your house smelling good try this! ... aqueez a sniff NCHA add ajoutez-en de poquito, a little, un add eche peu, a lot! un ou montón! beaucoup! GAIN fireworks I rehaussur scent booster Lanz Issue intersilicador da partudo de SWEET SIZZLE 375g (132 OZ) 53 1,128 5,102 322K

°+٠٤٥ 63 + . @bendergirlfrend• 18h ... I would love to drink a beer with him W 41 4,252 36.7K 1.2M

Iva Dixit @ivadixit 4h ... May we all meet such a fate as NJ Transit Bull someday ... escape, stardom, sanctuary. Jeanette Hayes @jeanette... 4h I'm just so happy for the New Jersey bull who escaped slaughter - he lives in a sanctuary now! Не did it! 10 5 1,300 18K del 701K

rowan finn @bigoldeels 22h a lot of people don't realize this Best Geneist @okaykaiju 22h you can ruffle him and then smooth him back out 35 7,228 80.5K 2.6M

LoLo Vonz @LoLoVonz. 21h Put her with a Black family this time, I could use a laugh POP CRAVE Pop Crave @PopCrave22h 'Orphan 3' is officially in development. 143 2,358 20K 910K

lyosias @whitest_injera 23h she so real NEW YORK POST New York Post @nypost. 1d Boston mayor under fire for secret no whites Christmas party trib.al/ EljWmGY Elected of Color Holiday Party Tomorrow Inbox Denise DosSantos 12:24PM Honorable Members: On behalf of Mayor Michelle Wu, cordially invite you and a guest to the Electeds of Color Holiday Party on Wednesday, December 13th at 5:30pm at the Parkman House, 33 Beacon Street Please let me know if you plan to attend and if you have any dietary restrictions. Best, Denise DosSantos (She/Her/Hers) Director City Council Relations Office - Intergovernmental Relations Mayor Michelle

Toby Let People Build Housing Muresianu 1d ... Got sick of losing the Apple TV remote so I decided to treat it like a coffee shop bathroom key 44 1K 34K 966K

clarevoyant @kneeyockartee. 18h If I entered this competition they'd probably take me out the back and shoot me Fascinating @fasc1nate.23h International Posture Queen, 1957. The young woman with the straightest spine and the most perfect poise and personality would win. Contestants were given X- rays to determine whose spine was the straightest. Crooked spines were grounds for elimination. 1957 24 2.7K 37K 2M

emy @theamazingemy 23h ... this flight about to be a movie A24 - 11:22 AM ... LAND SPEED IAED DEPOT LAND SPEED All Customers WE RECYCL SLC 3.9K 72 91K 1.6M

Grinch hunter @pugmane.17h Bruce Springsteen lyrics: gay fieri @papa_talisa. 1d 5 gallons of pickles at 11 pm in south philly Schedules PRIORITY SEATING Disabilities For Persons & Seniors With Yield These Seats DELI PICKLES SALLONS KEEP RAPLAN REFRIGERAT ZUSRIM CAME 19 710 9.4K 787K

miss worm @missuswormy 22h ... why are drugs always girl names? Molly, Mary, Lucy... what about calling something Steve or Dan 60 493 5.5K 193K

OBEY @cryst6l 16h ... i get high and start googling shit like who wrote the bible 11 505 4.7K 123K

Rafa Sales Ross @rafiews . 20h ... Hugh Grant wanting to die at the thought of saying Oompa Loompa, Natalie Portman and Julianne Moore cackling at the idea of watching Riverdale, Harris Dickinson joyfully singing Breaking Free while playing with puppies... Man, I'm glad actors are back 2 212 3.8K del 110K

LOLLY @thesIider.17h ... catch57 Besides that it is completely unnecessary why did we stop grilling musicians like this. mfer look like he got subpoenaed 252 2.8K 70K 3

Rachel Paige @rachmeetsworld 1d this is how your email finds me every day between thanksgiving and nye 2 886 8.8K del 213K

Colin @colinarmis • 13h still one of the hardest images ever made INVEST IN YOUR QUEEN, SHE MAKE THE MOVES THE KING CAN'T. psivadigitalart 8 611 4.9K 87K

hans @ratkingsy 1d big day tomorrow 10m ago Valentina Howlett tomorrow can you say 'the muffin man' to me jordyn harvey 14m ago i have to tell u abt the craziest coincidence tmr 6 240 20K 539K

dylan @laswagna 23h ITS so OVER got off the bus gonna go get head and find somewhere to hang til the train comes Dad D Go get head? Mom Doh! lol i meant food!!! 121 1.4K 59K 2M

Ron Iver @ronnui_ 5h Rise and grind baby + Gym Routine Friday 12-15-2023 Bench Press (just lay down for a min) Walk around gym high-fiving everyone. Let them know they can achieve anything. Drive to Dunkin X 451 1 7.5K 292K

wren vs. the world @stardustr....2 22h ... Danielle @behindnmetaints-1 1d wait... you like music and movies too?! this is insane, i've never met anyone with this much in common with me... it must mean something 37 5,573 48.8K 1.7M

horse dentist @equine_dentist.4h ... this works wonders What to Do When Someone Has a Panic Attack Feed them LSD and hold their shoulders and shakem profusely while continuously saying NIGHTMARE! NIGHTMARE! NIGHTMARE! NIGHTMARE! 6 1,003 9,485 337K

cory @coolmathgame_.33 friend: i'm thinking about moving to oregon me:  i i wouldn't 3 494 6,466 del 175K

PATRIK @PatrikSandberg 22h ... The male tramp stamp is the thigh tattoo. 41 1,061 12K 478K

kevin @psychopimp420.12h ... Today 1:05 AM So how have you been Been pretty good other than kinda dealing W some mental health shite But I just started my Wellbutrin again today and actually had a seriously amazing day Ah Damn that's crazy Can I use your Hulu 2 34 1,274 33.2K
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