27 of the Most Awkward Experiences People Had at a Doctor’s Appointment

One patient peed on their doctor
27 of the Most Awkward Experiences People Had at a Doctor’s Appointment

One would think that adulthood would free you from having awkward experiences at the doctor’s office, but unfortunately for some — like the guy who needed to have a soda bottle cut from his dick — the awkward moments just keep on coming. And while some people definitely could’ve avoided being in these extremely cringey situations (looking at you again, Soda Bottle Dick Guy), others were just victims of circumstance. 

The medical professionals and patients of Reddit have stood united and shared some of the most awkward experiences they’ve endured at an appointment, including doctors having a laugh, poorly-timed coincidences and autopilot responses that will haunt them forever. 

squidmyster64 . 6 6y I had a sore on my penis the doctor took out a magnifying glass and inspected it, then acted like he couldn't see anything, he made a little smirk and a giggle I did not realize till later he was making a joke about my penis size. Ok you got me Doc. ... 269
 . 6y Probably when I had an ultrasound on my scrotum. I had a lo, had the lump checked out. Не made a awkward comment about testicles looking like aviator glasses on the screen and mine were perfect shape. Didn't have cancer though, which was nice ... 282
Mikez63 1y I had a cyst on my upper buttcrack for the better part of a month.. one lovely Saturday morning it's gotten so large and swollen that I couldn't even walk or sit down without crying in pain I'm the first person to the Urgent Care that morning and find myself laying sideways on a table with a lovely Doctor using a scalpel to force an eruption of the volcano that had formed between my cheeks. It was instant relief and used probably 20 pieces of gauze to clean up. I'd say that one.. even worse than getting my
40% lurkker 10y I had to remove a plastic soda bottle off a guys dick that got stuck while fapping in it. (Yes, apparently it's a thing). After using ring cutters without success, I was able to pry the top off with pliers. Unfortunately, I was standing right in the like of fire and got pissed on (that's what I'm telling myself). I yelled, mother fucker! And the guy just laughed and said, I guess I won't be doing that again. ... 1.3k
modsherearebattyboys. 1y When I had to show my naked butt to the doctor in the hospital and she spread my butt cheeks to look inside and then a dozen student doctors (interns?) came in the room and were all staring at my butt for what felt like hours. ... 5.2k
 . . 6y Not me, but my mom's friend went to the doctor all concerned when she was 17 (this was back in the day) because she had recently started touching herself and discovered a lump near her genitalia. The female gyno congratulated the 17y/o scared virgin on finding her clitoris. ... 204
friday6700 . . 10y I was once checking stitches on a patients leg who was wearing a skirt and going commando. She sneezed and peed on me. I stood up and in an effort to alleviate the tension she gave an awkward grin and said softly, I guess I did have to go.... I left without a word and got cleaned up before telling her doctor she was ready for her. Buh. I have other patient stories if there's interest. ... 2.2k
_Larry o 1y I had blood in my urine once. Went to the doctor and we figured out that I had popped a small blood vessel in my genital area from jerking off too hard/too often. Doctor: Are you sexually active? Me: Not currently. Doctor: Masturbation? Me: A lot. Too make things worse, there was some college dude shadowing the doctor that day.. ... 3.1k
Bacon_Piggies . 6y I went to the doctor to treat my soar throat and I agreed to get a shot of penicillin. If you don't know this shot goes right into the ass. As he put the needle into my rear end I suddenly had the need to vomit. I wasn't feeling anything until the exact moment of contact with my cheek. I yell STOP and immediately try to run over to the sink where I proceed to trip and fall. Then I just start letting it all out over the floor. I was just laying there on my side
Hitz365 6y Was at a urologist in a hospital and there were a couple of power cuts. Lights dipped out, generators kicked in. As he's finishing the examination, mid-sentence, the lights go out again. Не gets up and walks out to check on things. Fifteen minutes later I'm still sat on the bed with my old chap out and pants around my ankles. A nurse walks past the open door and does one of those comedy double-takes. ....do you...do you have an appointment? Turns out the doc had actually finished the examination, and returned to the ward some 15 minutes
Freikorp 1y I was pretty young, had never swallowed a pill before, my only experience with anything pill like was flinstone vitamins. I was in there with my mom and was given a tylenol and a cup of water, and I guess no one imagined I had never taken a pill before, so I immediately popped it in my mouth and vigorously chewed, and then immediately threw up from the bitter taste. My reaction was surprise and confusion. Doctor was just like ... You just swallow them... with the water... like I was some damn idiot. ... 10.8k
 . 6y I had a tick latch itself into my penis. A female doctor had to remove it... In front of my wife, who came along for moral support and couldn't stop laughing. ... 372
KeyProtection7 . 1y Cut the flap of skin that connects my sack to the shaft of my penis with hair clippers. Not only was it a day that they were training new doctors but also my mom worked for the hospital and saw my name on the computer system. So by the end of the visit, I had 5 extra young doctors staring while I got stitches but also my mom walked in too thinking something bad happened to me ... 4.3k
show_the_maw . 6y During a yearly check-up the doc was concerned about my weight. I promised him I'd do better and next year I would be back down to a healthy weight. Maybe a week or so later my doc saw me at a local pub with a plate of hot wings in front of me and a pint of beer. Не was a bro and didn't say anything but I could see the look of disappointment in his eyes. ... 1.9k
GargleHemlock.1 1y The time I went for a pelvic exam, and my gynecologist was rummaging around down there and suddenly asked me if I'd ever been to the Grand Canyon. ... 1.6k
StChas77 6y Was at a dermatologist at age 18 before heading off to college. I had a few red spots on my chest and she wanted to check down below to ensure there was no internal bleeding. While my pants were down and she was checking, the nurse walked in without knocking and had a nice view along with half the waiting room. The nurse backed out quickly and I received a profuse apology. The doctor had to go prepare a treatment and I got to hear her tear the nurse a new one in the next room. ... 655
StLightManifesto 10y I am the son of a surgeon I went with my dad to see an elderly patient who needed a cast. I was 9 and we were going to an assisted living facility to take of this lady's cast, as she couldnt make it in to the hospital. Не had a little saw (which was loud) but he touched it while it was on to show her it wasn't going to cut her. Upon him touching the saw to tbe cast she starts screaming bloody murder, HES CUTTING MY ARM OFF!! I was scared shitless but he pressed
AussieMilk 1y Infected ballsack. Crushed my nuts with a milkcrate at work, and when asked by the emergency staff how it happened they were confused. Spent roughly 10hrs trying to explain how and even had to demonstrate a few times. ... 2.8k
ERdoc987 10y While working in the ED, a very attractive female in her mid twenties came in her boyfriend complaining of abdominal pain. Part of the work up requires a pelvic exam and bimanual exam (girl in stirrups, 2 fingers in as deep as possible to feel the cervix). I offered to have a female perform the exam but she said it was ok if I did. A chaperone was present but her boyfriend demanded to watch as well. Не stood across the foot of the bed from me and started me in the eyes with a scowl the entire
 10y A lot of my friends became nurses, so I've heard some wonderful stories. The best one though.... A friend of mine had just graduated nursing school, and she was working at a Seattle-area hospital (I cant remember exactly which one), and they had a man come in who had shoved an ordinary household lightbulb up his ass.....and it shattered. My friend spent hours shining a light in a guy's asshole, which was held open with spreaders, and helping the doctor as he plucked shards of lightbulb out of the guy's butthole.
DAM5150 1y Went to the ER for stomach pains, worried about appendix, spleen, gall bladder etc. I was constipated. My brother still tells the joke that the one time i went to the doctor I was full of shit. ... 19.6k
That_One_Guy_Inc. 10y A nurse once told my father she would be coming back to give him a shot. Не removed his pants completely and sat on the exam table. She was very confused when she returned but still gave my dad his shot in his shoulder. ... 1.5k
 . 10y Gave a girl a pelvic exam at a free clinic. She was my waitress the next evening. She was my age, which made it even a little more awkward, somehow. Did you ever see that episode of Fawlty Towers where Basil is serving some Germans and doesn't want to mention WWII? I felt like that the whole evening, like at some point I was just going to say, I'll have the steak tartare and a side of vagina I MEAN FRENCH FRIES. ... 180
dccujko . . 10y I went in to get a rectal exam once and the doctor came in and told me to turn on my side and as I was doing so he was putting on the gloves then all of a sudden I hear a loud pop followed by sigh why do we only have the small gloves here. Needless to say I was absolutely terrified. ... 1.5k
cecefoo . 10y ER doctor, so nothing is really a regular check-up, but... I was interviewing a fairly attractive young lady about a pelvic complaint, and she answers all of my questions quite comfortably with some guy in the room. I hand her a gown so she can change for the pelvic exam, and she says can you ask this guy to leave first? Не just followed me in here from Triage. Last time I neglected to establish the relationship of all the people in the room. ... 3.4k
Joewhimsy . 10y A GP who worked with my dad had a great one. An older guy came in and she wound up having to do a rectal exam. So he lay on his side and she slipped her finger up his butt, at which point she says now just give it a squeeze, please. The patient gingerly reaches around with his hand and squeezes the base of the probing digit. Everyone in a three mile radius dies from laughter within hours. ... 55
mocopoco . 6y Went about an anal problem. The doctor put his finger up to check all was ok, I made a slight noise and he asked if I was ok. And this is when I said That's nice, instead of That's ok. ... 2.8k
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