24 of the Funniest Tweets from December 11, 2023

Tiny clown lover seeking same
24 of the Funniest Tweets from December 11, 2023

Like a phoenix from the ashes, the Golden Globes are back. After some disruption due to the Hollywood Foreign Press Association’s notorious lack of diversity and inclusion, the nominations for Tinseltown’s drunkest celebration of film and television were announced this morning. Despite some questionable decisions like a film exploring the fallout of a salacious sex scandal being considered a comedy, the slate of nominees is relatively solid and likely a precursor of what’s to come on Oscar Sunday. Barbie topped Oppenheimer as the vision in pink leads the pack with nine nominations (three of which are in a single category). The show will also feature the inaugural award for Cinematic and Box Office Achievement which will, once again, see Swifties and Marvel fanboys go toe-to-toe. The ceremony airs on January 7th and will call CBS home for the first time since 1982.

While Christopher Nolan can’t seem to shake free from Greta Gerwig’s shadow these days, all signs point toward him joining his fellow Golden Globe nominee in the billion dollar box-office club. Not only is Oppenheimer seeing a steady uptick in domestic showings, but “following months of thoughtful dialogue,” the film will get a theatrical release in Japan come 2024. Japanese distributor Bitters End acknowledged the sensitivity around the subject matter for the nation as they reached their decision late last week. 

As the year winds down, the timeline has yet to let up on the comedy. Today’s funny tweets include those about the most devout fanbase, a chair that just wants to ask you a few questions and what Fred was getting into when Wilma was away. 

Lord of Misrule @valkalrie 20h ... don't know if this guy meant gestures or just really likes miniature clowns My simple pleasures Small jesters 111 6,874 107K 2.6M
Erno stoned cold fox @roastmalone_. 1d ... the whos are so worried about why the grinch hates Christmas that they don't even stop to ask why he walks around with his whole ass out 29 3,242 43.2K 1.3M
Big Tucson Dad @BigTucson... 1d ... The natural predator of an ice cold beer COASTY @coastyla... 2d This phenotype carried America Bowl. Preview N N N N 148 6,125 97.3K 7.7M
BIG BILL 35K (COMMS OPEN) 1d ... Y'all think it's hot today wait til you go to hell for using your engineering degree to work for a defense contractor 10 1,058 9,093 320K
Costco Hotdog @gayspud.1 1d Last time I go to a holiday party in Brooklyn 27 540 29.9K 1.1M
mothman @grantisdumb . 2 20h the separate AMC A-List concessions line is my favorite Mr Borry Ree Santrich the THE MA alternate form of the caste system 2 128 1.8K 94K
meg Yooper bitchell @MeganBitchell 1.20h I miss working a blue collar job where the boys would just sit around and list porn stars and go oh my god yes in reaction to every one 40 335 14K 1.1M
prezoh @prezoh . 1d crazy frog 1 Like Follow crazy frog @crazyfrogalt Follows you Joined July 2023 75 Followers 1 Following Not followed by anyone you're following Likes Posts Replies Media prezoh @prezoh . Dec 1 i could give crazy frog the best head of his life 96 52K 20 1.5K 13 16K 706 256K
comeback jack @meanunclejack•1 14h i want mooning to come back in a big way in 2024. bare asses are inherently funny and non threatening. shouting hey you! and hanging an ass out a car window while your friend drives away really fast is a basic human right 4 3 80 4.8K
Vita @majipres 19h ... 2024 goals LEARN TO LOSE SOME JOIN A CULT KILL WEIGHT DRESS TO TAX EVASION BECOME STRONG IMPRESS AS HELL 57 13K 62K 1.9M
Sean Garrette @seangarrette 14h ... I never understand Sza's imagery. Like why are you holding a chicken wearing a 3XL jersey? 79 1.1K 9.4K 602K
mihir @__mihir 1d She call me mao the way I'm laying zedong 54 2.6K 25K 976K
clare @sadderlizards • 1d hey could you come pick me up they're pelting me with rotten fruit in the town square again 13 1.3K 9.6K 525K
Joe SOON MAGFest @pngsequence 1d Nobody talks about these. Fucking love these things 56 1.2K 17K 292K
(-_-;) @girIscientist 19h i like birds @midsommar_stan Is the grinch his name or his ethnicity or his job 3:49 PM 12/15/21 Twitter for iPhone 18K Retweets 1,167 Quote Tweets 154K Likes (-_-;) @girIscientist-19h that tweet that was like was the grinch his name or his race 84 11.5K 140K 4.3M
dial tone @xanborghini- 1d ... pizza laying on the fitted sheet I know your house smell like a karate mat ace @Acejittt. 1d Bet U can't get this high 37 1,967 20.6K 1.2M
bigestaban @bigestaban 1d ... my blood cells reaction after they see me tear off a scab that took them 10 hours to make clearview ENERGY 39 6,568 95.8K 2.9M
bigsock @biggersocks 21h ... Me making sure you're enjoying it You being forced to watch my favorite movie boredpanda.com 247 11.5K 89.8K 2.7M
bald ann dowd @ali_sivi 20h ... i i can't believe i just found this out, but having shawty like a melody in your head isn't normal. this is common within people who have ADHD or autism and it's called internal shawtyolalia, which a lot of neurotypicals don't have 68 5,769 57.8K 1.6M
M @Wheeema 1d ... when you've ignored your laundry for weeks: 56 9,715 59.5K the 2.1M
angela wheezy @carpeangela•1 19h ... haaate that couch sleepy does not transfer to bed sleepy 78 12.3K 136K 2.9M
sam @wifrieren 11h ... he is under mind control 154 10.7K 81.6K 1.4M
eliza @elizamclamb 19h ... Every time I scratch my cat's neck I'm like..think about how much an animal has to trust you to let you put your hand on it's throat...though we have never spoken she sleeps at my feet every night and we have a love that transcends both species and language.. 63 6,857 65.7K 1.6M
PieGuy @ilovepie84.1d - Sorry can't. Busy replying cubic zirconia? Under all the Christmas engagement pics on Facebook 25 1,719 24.6K del 969K
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