The 100 Greatest ‘SNL’ Holiday Sketches

One hundred holiday sketches? Cracked readers must have been very good this year

Authors: By Matt Solomon
Published: December 07, 2023
Comments: 0

Quiz: What Unhinged Admissions Did These Celebrities Make in the Middle of An Interview?

Danny, you scoundrel!

Authors: By Jesse
Published: December 07, 2023
Comments: 0

The Best of Live-Action ‘South Park’

Fans choose the greatest moments of un-animated comedy from the ‘South Park’ canon

Authors: By Keegan Kelly
Published: December 07, 2023
Comments: 1

14 Funny, Weird or Insane Lies That Blew Up in Peoples’ Faces

Learn from these liars’ mistakes

Authors: By Ian Garner
Published: December 07, 2023
Comments: 1

5 ‘90s Icons Who Have Not Had a Great Year

2023 wasn’t the best year for some celebs we first met three decades ago.

Authors: By JM McNab
Published: December 07, 2023
Comments: 1

35 Very Uncool Moments From Celebs

By:: Cracked Writers; Jay L'Ecuyer

November 15, 2023

35 Very Uncool Moments From Celebs

Man, we’re so happy that an entire industry doesn’t broadcast our mistakes and “uncoolness” to the world! The tabloids aren’t out for our unknown, unfamous blood, and after compiling this list, we’re darn grateful that our dreams of fame and fortune never came true. At least, that’s what we tell ourselves.

35

JENNIFER LAWRENCE LIED ABOUT TAKING A BREAK FROM ACTING. PHOENI@ A D In 2018, the actress announced she'd be taking a year off from acting in order to focus on political activism. Just a few days later, she apparently dropped the idea as her reps told Entertainment Weekly that she would be returning to work as soon as one of her many projects was ready to start production. CRACKED.COM — Source

34

TODD LATOURRETTE LIED ABOUT HOW НЕ LOST HIS ARM. APPLEATED In 2018, the Better Call Saul actor admitted that he cut his own arm off during a psychotic episode almost 20 years ago. Не told people it was an Afganistan war-injury in order to secure more acting jobs. CRACKED.COM — Source

33

TYRESE GIBSON CLAIMED WILL SMITH GAVE HIM $5 MILLION FOR HIS CUSTODY BATTLE. In a 2017 Instagram rant, Gibson claimed that his estranged wife was pregnant, that he's broke, and that Smith gave him $5 million. A couple of weeks later, the actor admitted he made it all up and blamed his outburst on antidepressant medication. CRACKED.COM — Source

32

TERRENCE HOWARD FALSELY CLAIMED TO HAVE A PH.D. IN CHEMICAL ENGINEERING. any DE In 2013, Howard told Jimmy Kimmel that he got a doctorate from South Carolina State University. However, he actually only got an honorary degree after speaking at the school's commencement ceremony-scsu doesn't even offer a chemical engineering degree. CRACKED.COM — Source

31

Justin Bieber's Instagram post New jet for Christmas, and she's beautiful. made many believe that he'd bought the plane. The truth is, he only rented it for a Christmas trip. CRACKED.COM — Source

30

Rapper Bow Wow posted on Instagram that he was flying to NYC, and included this shot of a private car and jet on the apron. shadmoss Travel day. NYC press run for Growing Up Hip Hop. Lets gooo. I promise to bring yall the hottest show EVER. May 25th on @wetv Не was later spotted So this guy lil bow WOW is on my flight to NY. flying coach on a But on instagram he posted a picture of a private jet captioned traveling to NY today smh commercial plane. Не had posted a photo from a VIP transportation site. — Source

29

While auditioning for Elizabeth I, Eddie Redmayne led the director to believe he was an experienced horseback rider. Не got the part and the truth came out. Redmayne nearly killed himself trying to shoot his scene on the horse. GRACKED.COM — Source

28

MATT DAMON LIED TO GET HIS FIRST ACTING GIG. USE YOUR SMARTS In order to secure his first acting job for a program on a local Boston TV station, Damon lied about being able to ice skate. Не says he went on to injure himself during the shoot, and that he cost the production money. CRACKED.COM — Source

27

T.I. PRETENDED TO BE AN OWNER OF A CRYPTOCURRENCY COMPANY. EXCHANGE AND COMMISSION SECURITIES In 2020, the SEC charged T.I for promoting FLiK, an unregistered and fraudulent ICO, to his followers and claiming to be its co-owner. Не was forced to pay $75, ,000 and got barred from participating in the cryptocurrency market for five years. CRACKED.COM — Source

26

VIN DIESEL SAID НЕ USED TO BE A BEASTIE BOYS BACKUP DANCER. EAST CURIOUS When Ad-Rock was asked about his claim, the musician said that it wasn't true. Не thinks Adam Yauch might've helped Diesel get into a dance club once and that the actor might've misinterpreted that as being a part of the band in some way. CRACKED.COM — Source

25

STEVE RANNAZZISI LIED ABOUT BEING IN THE WORLD TRADE CENTER ON 9/11. In 2015, The League star came clean and admitted that he came up with the story to get people to like him after moving from New York to Los Angeles. CRACKED.COM — Source

24

TORI SPELLING LIED ABOUT HOW SHE LOST HER BABY WEIGHT. US After giving birth in 2012, Spelling told Us Weekly that she got into shape by doing low-impact cardio and by dieting. In her 2013 book, the actress revealed that that was a lie her publicist told her to say and that she actually lost the weight by starving herself. CRACKED.COM — Source

23

JOAQUIN PHOENIX MADE A FAKE ENGAGEMENT ANNOUNCEMENT. Phoenix appeared on the Late Show with David Letterman in 2014 and announced he was marrying his yoga instructor. The very next day, the Oscar winner admitted he came up with the story because his life is boring and he wanted the audience to like him. CRACKED.COM — Source

22

Jerry Lee Lewis MARRIED HIS UNDERAGE COUSIN CRACKED.COM The 22-year-old heartthrob kept his underage cousin-wife a secret for a while, until a journalist made it public mid-tour. His defense? It's cool guys, she's 15. (She was 13). — Source

21

David Hasselhoff HAMBURGLED HIS OWN REPUTATION CRACKED.COM In 2007, video leaked of him drunkenly mangling a hamburger on the floor while berating his daughter. Despite all that, he managed to reach a new low in 2010 with The Hasselhoffs, wherein he clings to fame while trying to shoehorn his daughters into the industry. — Source

20

Ceelo Green COULDN'T STOP DIGGING HIMSELF DEEPER CRACKED.COM After he was let off the hook for allegations of sexually assaulting an asleep person, he decided to clear his name by tweeting some truly wild opinions on the topic. Specifically, that one is not truly the victim of an assault if they don't REMEMBER!!! it. — Source

19

Prevea Health dropped Aaron Rodgers for lying about getting the Covid vaccine. PACKERS CRACKED.COM After stating, Yeah, I'm immunized at a press conference, he contracted Covid shortly after. Не then went on the Pat McAfee Show to defend his decision to not get the vaccine. Не had been a Prevea spokesperson for a decade. — Source

18

YouTube ended their partnership with Steven Crowder. CRACKED.COM After having his YouTube account suspended several times, a damning video surfaced of him verbally assaulting his pregnant wife. Claims that he exposed himself at work didn't help, and YouTube has removed him as a partner. — Source

17

CRACKED MICHELLE RODRIGUEZ'S MULTIPLE DUIS. In 2007, she was sentenced to 6 months in jail for failing to complete her community service obligations, stemming from a string of 3 drunk driving offenses in 2004. — Source

16

CRACKED A DRUNK REESE WITHERSPOON PULLED THE I'M FAMOUS CARD. Her arrest was caught on film in 2013, and she drunkenly yelled to officers, Do you know my name? You better not arrest me. They did arrest her... for disorderly conduct. H — Source

15

CRACKED SEAN PENN ASSAULTED A PHOTOGRAPHER. In 2010, Sean Penn was sentenced to three years of probation and 300 hours of community service for battery against photographer Jordan Dawes. Dawes needed knee surgery after the attack. — Source

14

CRACKED FELICITY HUFFMAN'S SAT FRAUD SCANDAL. She pleaded guilty to mail fraud, and admitted to paying $15,000 to a service that guaranteed to boost her daughter's SAT scores. She spent 14 days in prison, got 250 hours of community service, and paid a $30,000 fine. — Source

13

CRACKED.COM I love the smell of diapers. I even like when they're wet and you smell them all warm, like a baked good. Sarah Jessica Parker, truly finding yum in someone else's yuck (somehow) — Source

12

CRACKED.COM It's my placenta. My mom found it in my basement, crushed it up, and made it into a necklace that I wear every day to improve my psychic abilities. Ke$ha, discussing her Horcrux (we think) — Source

11

Elon Musk and, well, every second thing he says. - - - - Our top choice for dumbest take this time around is when he shared his skepticism concerning COVID-19: Elon Musk @elonmusk Mar 6, 2020 The coronavirus panic is dumb CRACKED.COM — Source

10

Nancy Pelosi thanks George Floyd for his sacrifice. coo TROUBLE After Derek Chauvin was convicted of murdering George Floyd, Pelosi gave a speech in which she thanked Floyd for sacrificing your life for justice. Being murdered isn't a sacrifice. CRACKED.COM — Source

9

Tom Cruise on antidepressants: 2005 THIS IS WHAT SCIENTOLOGISTS ACTUALLY BELIEVE CRACKED.COM The guy who believes that our bodies are riddled with ancient alien ghosts would have us believe that there is no such thing as a chemical imbalance in a body. — Source

8

Selena Gomez ROF SEB EXT. CRACKED.COM She reportedly forbade anyone on set at an Adidas commercial say the name Justin, shortly after her breakup with Justin Bieber. Multiple Jasons in the crew had to go by nicknames. — Source

7

Queen Latifah té CRACKED.COM She decided she was finished dying after her death in Set It Off. All of her contracts since 1996 stipulate that her character can't die. In her words, If I die, I can't be in the sequel. — Source

6

Lindsay Lohan CRACKED.COM She agreed to appear on a Russian talk show after breaking up with real estate mogul Egor Tarabasov -- if she was provided a private jet, a Russian visa, and a meeting with Putin. They... did not have her on. — Source

5

Tom Cruise WAR OF THE WORLDS CRACKED.COM Tom Cruise asked for a fully-staffed Scientology tent to be available on the set of War of the Worlds. Wait, Tom Cruise is a Scientologist?! Who knew! — Source

4

3

CRACKED.COM FOX NEWS FOX NEWS Always a fan of unbiased news coverage, Dick Cheney's downtime requirements rider requests that all televisions be tuned to FOX News upon his arrival. — Source

2

Kirk Cameron KK FAN CRACKED.COM Cameron refuses to kiss anyone but his actual wife, causing kiss scenes he's in to require CGI to paste in actresses over his wife. You'd think at that point, even God would be like, Dude. It's fine. Chill. — Source

1

Mariah Carey CRACKED.COM Carey demanded her dressing room contain 12 white Labrador puppies for an appearance on a British morning show. Doesn't she know that if you ever have more than 10 puppies in a room, a weird lady will try to make them into a coat? — Source

Scroll down for the next article

Must Read

5 Creative Ways Comedians Have Worked Around Censorship

If all else fails, curse in Jamaican

Authors: By Matt Solomon
Published: December 07, 2023
Comments: 0

30 Pixar Facts That Didn't Make Us Cry a Little Shut Up

We’re not crying, you’re crying

Authors: By Cracked Writers, Brian C. Miller
Published: December 06, 2023
Comments: 2

5 Useful Things Inventors Refused to Profit Off Of

Yeah, people actually used to do that

Authors: By Eli Yudin
Published: December 07, 2023
Comments: 1

29 of the Funniest Lies People Told to Children

‘Mannequins are children who misbehaved’

Authors: By Ian Garner
Published: December 07, 2023
Comments: 0

28 Advanced Bits of Trivia That Only the Most Advanced Trivia Hounds Should Attempt to Read

They told us that you couldn’t handle these, but we think you’re ready

Authors: By Jay L'Ecuyer, Cracked Writers
Published: December 07, 2023
Comments: 0

‘Santa Clauses’ Actress Casey Wilson Says That Working With ‘Bitch’ Tim Allen Was the ‘Single Worst Experience I’ve Ever Had With A Co-Star’

The ‘Saturday Night Live’ alumna says that Allen's on-set demeanor deserves a lump of coal

Authors: By Keegan Kelly
Published: December 07, 2023
Comments: 1

MUST READ

The 100 Greatest ‘SNL’ Holiday Sketches

One hundred holiday sketches? Cracked readers must have been very good this year

Authors: By Matt Solomon
Published: December 07, 2023
Comments: 0

Quiz: What Unhinged Admissions Did These Celebrities Make in the Middle of An Interview?

Danny, you scoundrel!

Authors: By Jesse
Published: December 07, 2023
Comments: 0

5 ‘90s Icons Who Have Not Had a Great Year

2023 wasn’t the best year for some celebs we first met three decades ago.

Authors: By JM McNab
Published: December 07, 2023
Comments: 1