62 of the Funniest Tweets from the Week of August 4, 2025

‘Spraying him with a spray bottle every time he rage baits me’
62 of the Funniest Tweets from the Week of August 4, 2025

It was truly the best and worst of times for South Park fans this week.

Following contentious negotiations between Paramount and South Park creators Trey Parker and Matt Stone that ultimately resulted in a new $1.5 billion deal, CEO and Streaming President Tom Ryan announced he would be stepping down from his role. Upon hearing the news, fans flocked to the show’s subreddit to show their gratitude

“With no actual evidence I’m giving credit for this to South Park,” wrote one fan. “You mean the deal where the next 50 episodes are already bought and paid for by Paramount whether they try to cancel South Park or not?” joked a second. “That deal? I’m going to have to agree with you then.”  

This wasn’t the only streaming shakeup that had TV fans talking either. With the Paramount and Skydance merger complete, both South Park and The Daily Show will be under the control of yet another controversial figure, CBS executive George Cheeks — the man who canceled The Late Show With Stephen Colbert.

It’s impossible to know what the future holds for television, but for you, the future involves reading this week’s funniest tweets, the best of which included those about the perfect date, Taylor Swift’s career options and why we’re getting “eight more weeks of white boy summer.”

Cole Netscape @aryanblack... ...1d s ... There is another We Love Food @_we_love_... 1d Mayo or Ketchup? 1K 214 45K dJ 2.3M
P* 4 @filmzwanda.12h ... need Finally got the whole set 4 58 3.1K 87K 720K
Jakob @jakedc6-12h S ... the holy trinity of scoreboard spellings P JONES O P:4 O P A's 0 1-2 1 S O H O M 0 107 2.6K 50K del 2M
Redd iRiS @ReddCinema 22h S ... Bill Clinton went home to this every day and still decided to cheat Aries @ihyaries . 1 1d i'm crying #GRAMMYs 394 2.4K 103K dJ 10M
j. deere hoosier @D....1 18h ... i just took the presidential fitness test & JOHN DEERE GREEN got grover cleveland :/ 30 721 15K 309K
hunter @hunter_hhhh 13h started playing stardew valley with my girlfriend cause i thought it would be a cute thing for us to do together but it turns out she has over 400 hours logged and is running our farm like the navy 281 12K 219K del 4M
Haunted Cave @dodgyfigure. 1d s ... Do you think in China they post like this about hamburgers and marlboro reds bubble boi @bubblebaby....1 1d Imagine pulling this out after some hot pot and tasting the spirit of a nation en # ... OR T 100 29K 981 511K
dc @skefhaus 12h A random 16 year old found my license this weekend and is telling me, with his full government name, that he's stealing my identity over instagram Anyway i texted his mom 29 1.1K 54K 551K
Ashley White I Chicago Est... 10h s .... accidentally ate shellfish last night and my ex stabbed me with my epi pen with a little too much force 67 2.2K 94K 1.2M
brandon* @brndxix.1d s ... they're playing with their dolls again Acyn @Acyn 1d Watters: You know how this ends? Sydney Sweeney is going to marry Barron Trump and it's going to create the greatest political dynasty in American history. AMERICANEAGLE/INSTAGRAM co FOX LIBERALS ARE LOSING IT OVER SYDNEY SWEENEY NEWS LIVE THE FIVE 20 635K 1.1K 41K
S Marie @ggmistaa 16h ... He's literally Barbie My Mixtapez @mymixta... 19h Man is going viral for working multiple 100 random jobs Tropical Shrubs plenting NEW GVV FITNESS TRAINER 24 5.8K 71K 974K
4 @N1NETY6S.1d s ... g women in birth control commercials while they're listing the side effects val @tomtheedaya 1d i put the dance clips together nxjjsnsn new reaction just dropped 0:13 4.7K 33 85K 1.7M
wens.1998 @1998Wens.18h G ... I love these photos taken by Daily bugle photographer Peter Parker. Не is Spider- Man's best photographer I Like Superheroes @MCU... 20h I can't believe Spider-Man is real 17 33K 464K 2.6K
Isaiah Simmons (Comm... 21h s ... My original character that I made up two seconds ago, who's twice as powerful as Dr. Manhattan. BLURAYANGEL @blur....- 1d Name a fictional character that could beat him: 393 3.2K 118K del 2.6M
* mot @peitossoft.22h S ... labubuchis @uchismedia-1d 91 948 11K 176K
Isiego.. @Isiego_. 1d And a Jet2 holiday. pegasus @heispeg_.2d Nothing beats having money fr. 95 25K 127K 3.4M
zonk @CastinZonk.4 4h Asking for a cigarette then adding it to my own pack 16 708 7.7K dJ 93K
H @viajetjaguar.19h hugged this girl and our glasses clanked, feels like a body 32 646 9.4K 154K
Andy Herman s ... @AndyHer... 6h Can't wait until they unify all the apps into a new app called cable. POP CRAVE @PopCrave.8 8h Pop Crave Disney+ and Hulu are launching a unified streaming app in 2026, fully integrating Hulu into Disney+. The standalone Hulu streaming service will be discontinued. hulu Disney+ 3.6K 140 48K 1.3M
PUNS @ThePunnyWorld 1d My niece calls me Ankle. I call her my Knees. 389 14K 122K 3.2M
Possum Reviews @Revie... 21h s ... She's looking at him the way a cartoon character suffering from hunger-induced delirium looks at their friend while hallucinating they're a giant burger or something. Emir Han @RealEmirHan·2 2d Vanessa Kirby wishing Henry Cavill had social anxiety cc 89 1.1K 25K 528K
Freaky Pippins @FreakyPippi... 1d s ... please give me suggestions to add to my list < Back August 5, 2025 at 11:40PM bro list: brotato chip brotein shake broap brotosvnthesis bronado brohemian rhapsody brodozer broseph stalin brobro siwa brodeo brocaine brochacho bromeo bromato brothamphetamine 1.8K 3.3K 30K 528K
big content guy @bigcon... 22h s ... B got big dawg-d by the gas station 15 cashier. 8 more weeks of white boy summer confirmed 12 296 9.4K 271K
gem tsitp spoilers @starlit... 1d s ... oh this is so the best one THE SUMMER I WOULD RATHER HAVE HAD SOMEONE SHOOT ME IN THE HEAD WITH A NAIL GUN, REPEATEDLY. 46 9.6K 68K 1.1M
ts lil rika @likewhet.20h S ... the main indicator that we all died and are in hell IGN @IGN.1d You can't stream Courage the Cowardly Dog anywhere now. bit.ly/ 46KPZ2U 3.4K 588K 27 26K
emily blunt's manager 12h ... unconfirm it Sydney Sweeney Daily 14h CONFIRMED: Sydney Sweeney joins the cast of The Devil Wears Prada 2. THE DEVIL WEARS PRADA 48 1.7K 38K 650K
Lorem ipsum @lethalluz.6h I got the job!! (intimacy coordinator at lockheed martin) 34 1.2K 25K 459K
largest rodent @capybarone... 6h s ... so committed to the game he had his whole right arm replaced with a massive basketball RG @RyanGreeneDNVR-6h molten FIBA APPROVED VALID THRU 100 - ORME PHIL SABIJA 15 triglav 34 1.3K 69K 702K
21h s ... No Context Tobey Magui... Perfect date @IICTOBEYM SPIDER-A 2 1.9K 24K 51 378K
Nat @wheresthestacks-1 18h O ... RES LIEF MUSICAR MUSICARES FIRERE FIRERELIE alfie @alfienxo. 1d yes i'm a hater, but i hate with ethics, nuance, and critical analysis 34 82K 9.9K 1.6M
Reggie Saxx @ReggiSaxx· 19h G ... chill i be late asf @Discu... 21h DF DiscussingFilm AMC Theatres is now working to shorten the amount of ads shown before a movie. (Source: Deadline) amc 307 80K 9.3K 2.9M
no context memes @....23h s ... SHOW CASE SHOW CASE how it feels driving home bal from a long ass trip and Glo finally recognising a random ass building SHOW CASE SHOW CASE gettyimages Global George Pimentel Global SHOW CASE SHOW 200 CASE CASE 16 1.7K 23K 223K
willnights @willnights1.8h S ... i'm so grateful she chose to be a singer and not a serial killer Pop Base @PopBase.9/19/23 1% of the 33 million Google puzzles for Taylor Swift's '1989 (Taylor's Version)' vault have been completed so far. You've solved 1 puzzle! Keep going! 307K puzzles have been solved globally to unlock Taylor's vault. Global progress 307.088/33M puzzles New puzzle 35 1.3K 31K 802K
Rebel @rebelhasaura 21h ... RADE you're in her dms, i'm in the passenger seat of her car. she is parallel parking. i have been here for 30 minutes 51 1K 22K 488K
@diomuarr 20h ... you're calling me a beautiful girl. the thing that almost killed sean kingston. 7 3.3K 28K del 634K
O ... April Clark @autogynefiles 18h A psychic told me I would be killed by a 30 year old man in his 60s. I laughed it off as utter nonsense. I'm not laughing anymore. POP CRAVE Pop Crave @PopCrave. 19h A child has been born from an embryo frozen in 1994, making it the oldest baby ever. 1994 rech 910 24K 528K del 10M
Shaun Johnson @ShyBucketGetter +16h G ... Tom Brady was so good that growing up I used to kneel next to my bed and pray that the Patriot's plane would explode @NFL. 19h NFL NFL Happy Birthday @TomBrady WAR WORLD WORLD BRADY SHOWAN WORLD CHAMPIOUS ENDIA WERS 950 234K 10K 12M
mara @vixeias Aug 2 ... spraying him with a spray bottle every time he ragebaits me 65 4.8K 41K del 1M
Harry Fong @AGenuineOutlaw. 17h ... I'm way too online I thought the red lines were those posture lines incels put on photos happy frida day @happyfridaday.17h happy frida fsunday mirates 12 601 32K 667K
lesbian wife guy ... @verysmallriver do not overmix make sure there are no pockets or lumps of flour i can only do one of those things big dog 3:29 PM Aug 3, 2025 390.7K Views 17 1.6K 31K 400
lims @ @limizms 17h ... Asked my grandpa if he had a scale i could borrow and he pulled out this ancient artifact HEAR - LO UED 197 2.5K 51K del 920K
I s lyris @tragickly Aug 4 ... rot & decay getting the correct targeted reels now When you only see your nun friend once a year and she's out of the loop 45.9K 128 8.296 12 613 15K del 239K
bendyjw @bendyjw. 19h O ... I Hope they intendo fix it. Oiley Olfactory Miracle @epicsaucers . 19h 'N' letter from the logo at Nintendo's Kyoto HQ is gone due to yesterday's typhoon intendo 172 3K 45K 1.1M
yedoye @yedoye_ 21h ... florence and the machine said the dog days are over in 2009 bro wtf kind of days are these then 48 3.3K 27K 555K
horse dentist @equine_dentist . 9h G ... in the middle of bugfuck nowhere 13 1.3K 22K 228K
@moralgrey Aug 4 ... pausing my book to discuss it with my walls schizophrenic jimmy fallon ... 23 10K 80K del 970K
O ... sunshine girl lindsy @lindsybunn - Aug 5 this is either going to be nectar of the gods or abysmal dog shit Each pack USE BY Salt Saturates Sugars Fat Energy 2169kJ 0.94g 31.5g 8.4g 15.8g 515kcal 07 AUG 16% 35% 42% 23% 26% 00:16 L3 KEEP REFRIGERATED of the reference intake* Typical values per 100g: Energy 1142kJ/ /271kcal VEGETARIAN Meal Deal Main TESCO BIRTHDAY CAKE SANDWICH LIMITED EDITION GET IT WHILE YOU CAN £3.00 767 3.9K 147K 4.2M
Ben Zornes @benzornes . 20h ... I like to think he just learned that he could go up there, and immediately dropped everything to do it. Alayna Treene @alaynatreene 21h POTUS is on the roof of the White House-asked why he's up there, he shouts back to us through his hands: just taking a little walk 77 833 33K del 1M
felicity shagwell e- n ... @liIpochaco i'm so so sorry but this is kind of cracking me up @chalkeat3r.1 18h Imk if this is tmi but my ex purposefully unblocks me to like the tweets where im miserable bro what the hel bro 6:16 PM Aug 5, 2025 2M Views 29 4.8K 98K 2.2K
thejirehscope) @sulcusandjirehs Aug 4 G ... jar jireh binks ( adam driver: every day i wake up and hope that you're dead!!!!!!!! the wolf: wow damn ok 4F DiscussingFilm @DiscussingFilm Aug 4 The Department of Agriculture is using the audio of Scarlett Johansson & Adam Driver fighting in 'MARRIAGE STORY' to scare off wolves from killing cattle & scaring livestock on farms I need the wolves to respond and know that, hey, humans are bad... 0:15 35 5.8K 75K 1.8M
Bacon G ... @Bacon_Incident Aug 6 BROTHER THEY TURNED ME INTO CLOUDS DUDE THEY'RE GONNA MAKE ME BRING RAIN TO AFRICA DON'T WANT TO DO IT BROTHER HELP Darren Rovell @darrenrovell. Aug 5 At sundown last night in Clearwater, the Hulkster appeared in the sky. Не was laid to rest there today. by @deejaysilver1) 34 2K 29K 733K
jordan @mosscircle 18h First day on the job as npr tiny desk intimacy coordinator 4 387 11K del 188K
s ... evil f. skeleton @chumblings 19h something to take the edge off S 98 820 14K del 172K
chloe @ChloeNumberIII· Aug 6 ... remember when a try guy cheated on his wife and the other try guys collectively acted like he bombed an elementary school? 123 776 18K del 1.7M
@ManMilk2 . 11h s ... Images That Make You Feel Pain Sylado In imagine if there was a Stegosaurus here everyone would be scared not.me tho, csiknow its a herbivore 48 1.1K 21K 341K
adi @perfectcelebrty - 21h s ... me after getting the surgery from the cheapest doctor in town pannchoa @pannchoa Aug 4 LIFTON CH Shoulder fillers becoming more and more trendy in Korea tinyurl.com/4ay8bkxb 60 1.2K 20K 715K
bob dhillon Follow s ... @thebugcollect0r the doctor is neither near nor far louis slotin @365potropica Aug 4 smoking AND eating an apple in public 3:56 AM Aug 4, 2025.8.6M Views 485 35K 533K 8.1K
doomer 0 ... @uncledoomer how the 32 year old barista with $120k in student loan debt looks at you as she turns the ipad around before you press no tip 2.1M Last edited 9:19 AM Aug 6, 2025 777.3K Views 169 855 933 26K
G ... @JustBeTweeting This the kind of love you found when you were unemployed with no car Bibawen @asimbawe Jul 15 0:03 12:01 AM Aug 6, 2025 4.8M Views 375 9.7K 126K 6.5K
Seth Joseph ... @SethJoseph95 No I used to refresh WWE.com and check Wikipedia for the results YEETSHINE @badgalbrih_ 23h So y'all parents wasn't paying for PPV's back then????? 2:30 PM Aug 6, 2025 1.5M Views 502 2.6K 20K 534
JP s ... @Awakenjp Aug 6 Graphic designer definitely born post 2001. PIA @Official_PIA Jan 9 PARIS, PIA WE'RE COMING TODAY. Resuming Flights between Islamabad and Paris PAKISTAN from January 10, 2025 International Airlines Win Great Poople 10 Fly 36 894 25K 1.4M

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