35 Oddly Specific Crimes You Couldn’t Pull Off With the Perfect Heist Team

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35 Oddly Specific Crimes You Couldn’t Pull Off With the Perfect Heist Team

You might spend years of your life planning the perfect crime. Or maybe a crime of opportunity will fall right into your lap. Either way, your safest move is to just read this list and live vicariously through these criminals.

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TWO FRENCHMEN DIED OVER STEAK DINNER. POLICE SUSPECTED FOUL PLAY. Actually, the older man choked to death on a chunk of steak. This could've been fixed by his younger companion, but he was busy dying of a heart attack triggered by the sight of his friend choking. CRACKED.COM

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IN 2017, MOMA FOUND TWO PHOTOS MISSING. 12 THEY HAD A COMBINED VALUE OF $105,000. There were no eyewitnesses, no security footage, not a single clue. It was the perfect crime ... for about four days. After that, the photographs were anonymously returned to the museum, completely unscathed. CRACKED.COM

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VASSILLIS PALAIOKOSTAS STOLE A TANK. 11= 826207 НЕ USED IT TO BREAK HIS BROTHER OUT OF JAIL. This capped off a grand criminal career that started with blockading the police station so he could rob a jewelry store while the police failed to escape their own building. CRACKED.COM

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DR. SCHNEEBERGER ASSAULTED PATIENTS. BUT HIS DNA WASN'T A MATCH. Then police finally tested his hair instead and got a match. It turned out the doctor had inserted a tube of someone else's blood into his own arm, and he'd used this each time to fool the police with someone else's DNA. CRACKED.COM

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In Lisbon, Portugal, authorities have not been able to stop people from stealing ceramic tiles known as azulejos, which have been part of the city's culture for decades. Thieves have been ripping them off the walls and selling them for hundreds of euros on the black market. CRACKED.COM

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People went strangely bats**t crazy after a shortage of avocados hit New Zealand. Specifically, the criminal kind of crazy. Both professional and amateur thieves raided orchards and sold the loot on the black market, costing the growers thousands of dollars. GRACKED.COM

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The region of Sava, Madagascar is a hotbed of vanilla thefts. After the global price for vanilla soared by more than 500%, so did the number of thefts. The crime aggravated the local farmers so much that caught thieves face the prospect of being beaten to death by them. CRACKED COM

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People keep leaving their loved ones' ashes at the Jane Austin House. While it's legal to scatter ashes in public places in the UK, you need to have permission from the property owner, which nobody has. CRACKED.COM

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IF YOU LIVE IN THIS HOUSE IN WESTFIELD, NEW JERSEY... YOU WILL RECEIVE DISTURBING LETTERS FROM A STALKER KNOWN ONLY AS THE WATCHER. One such letter reads... My grandfather watched the house in the 1920s and my father watched in the 1960s. It is now my time. POLICE HAVEN'T YET IDENTIFIED A SUSPECT. GRACKED.COM

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