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27 ‘Utopian’ Societies That Are Anything But

By:: Jay Wells L'Ecuyer; Cracked Writers

December 17, 2023

27 ‘Utopian’ Societies That Are Anything But

It’s easy to think that a place called The Hillsong Church, or a group called The Breatharians would be straight up lovely, right? Well, the titles definitely sold us! But after we spent some serious time getting to know the leaders and the overall ethos of their cults (sorry, groups), we came back with our fair share of PTSD. Maybe a little trip to Disney World will help calm our… Oh God! No!!!

27

CRACKED THE FOX SISTERS HELD PHONY SEANCES. They swindled untold numbers of people during the 19th-century Spiritualism movement and were even authenticated by skeptics, none of whom could figure out that they were just cracking their joints to make otherworldly sounds. — Source

26

CRACKED GREGOR MACGREGOR SOLD LAND ON HIS FAKE COUNTRY. Hundreds of people set sail to establish a colony on an island he absolutely didn't own only to find completely undeveloped wilderness. More than 150 of them died of tropical diseases, which is fine because they were filthy colonists. — Source

25

Walt Disney World has a severe alligator infestation. The number of alligators caught within the premises of the resort increases every year, mainly because it is located at the center of water ways and canals commonly inhabited by alligators. GRAGKED.COM — Source

24

After wasting 30 million dollars and causing an incredible amount of environmental damage... Disney had to completely abandon a fully built resort in the Bahamas. They didn't fully map out the logistics of ferrying the tourists to and from their cruise ships, and instead of salvaging what they could and relocating, they left it all in place to rot. CRACKED.COM — Source

23

UNTIL 2001, LAUNDERING OF COMPANY-ISSUED UNDERWEAR WAS SO SUB-PAR, DISNEY PARK EMPLOYEES WERE GIVEN STINKY, STAINED UNDIES-AS WELL AS PUBIC LICE AND SCABIES. IT TOOK THE TEAMSTERS UNION TWO MONTHS TO CONVINCE DISNEY TO ALLOW EMPLOYEES TO TAKE UNDERWEAR HOME TO WASH THEMSELVES. CRACKED.COM — Source

22

CRACKED.COM In 1974, 18 year-old Debbie Stone became the first Disney Employee to die on the job. Following a performance of America Sings, a ride with a rotating stage, Debbie became trapped by a moving wall and was crushed to death. — Source

21

GRACKED COM Walt Disney World's River County was once responsible for the death of a boy in 1980, who died after contracting a brain-eating amoeba while swimming in the water park. However, this incident wasn't enough to shut it down. It was only shut down in 2001 due to lack of demand. — Source

20

Michelle Pfeiffer When she first moved to Hollywood in the '80s, Pfieffer got mixed up in a cult of breatharians, who believe that the most spiritually advanced people can live without food or water, who she ini- tially thought were harmless personal trainers but soon began controlling all of her time and taking all her money. It wasn't until she was researching cults for her then-husband's role in a movie that she was like, Oh, hey, I'm in a cult, maybe I should get out of this cult. CRACKED NOW YOU KNOW — Source

19

The Source Family The Source was a famous L.A. vegan restaurant featured in Annie Hall in a scene about how much L.A. vegan restaurants suck. It was also run by a cult headed by a guy who had 13 child brides. It was nevertheless popular with celebrities, particularly John Lennon, who was said to get into deep conver- sations with the waitresses/cult mem- bers and whose son even made a music video inspired by the guru. CRACKED NOW YOU KNOW — Source

18

17

Hillsong Church The Hillsong megachurch family is a group of churches popular with celebrities like Justin Bieber, Chris Pratt, and various Kardashians which ex-members have described as a toxic environment full of abuse, coercion, isolation, and Chris Pratt. CRACKED NOW YOU KNOW — Source

16

Fraternities were set up for the purposes of fostering intellectual debate, sharing academic knowledge and general self-improvement. Somehow this became Animal House, brutal initiation rituals that sometimes lead to death and a horrible amount of sexual assaults. Disgraceful. CRACKED — Source

15

A super fascinating organization, marrying Freemasonry, the occult and philosophy, the Hermetic Order splintered in 1903 after its founders fell out over issues concerning Aleister Crowley. Four subsequent magic organizations were set up, mainly involving a lot of sex stuff. CRACKED — Source

14

The Horseman's Word was a 17th-century secret society for Scottish horsemen, functioning like a trade union while also sharing tricks of the trade with members. Oh, and sharing secrets on how to make women more docile. That's not cool, guys. CRACKED — Source

13

The real Illuminati only lasted a decade or so - it started in Bavaria in 1776 to attempt to bring justice to church-controlled states, but ended a decade later due to infighting about whether there was a God or not. CRACKED — Source

12

The U.S. is 1 of only 4 countries in the world that does not require paid maternity leave. The U.S. ranks last among developed countries when it comes to paid parental leave. While many U.S. companies offer paid parental leave, the United States is the only advanced country without a federal law mandating it. CRACKED.COM — Source

11

Unlike many other countries around the world, America doesn't officially embrace the tradition of napping. It's a cultural expectation in places like Italy, Spain, Greece, the Philippines, Nigeria & others, but viewed as slacking here. CRACKED.COM — Source

10

The United States is the only nation that hasn't ratified the Convention on the Rights of the Child (CRC), which means that American children may be treated by the criminal justice system as adults, including being arrested and serving life sentences. CRACKED.COM — Source

9

In the US, the number of vacant houses are six times greater than the number of homeless people. USA Europe Homeless 3.5 million 4.1 million people Vacant 18.5 million 11 million houses The ratio in Europe is less than half that. CRACKED.COM — Source

8

CRACKED.COM Drugs are more expensive in the US than other nations. A month's supply of diabetes medication Januvia costs $168.61 after discounts in the US. Canada pays the next highest price ($68.10), which is not discounted and still $100 less. — Source

7

CRACKED.COM MYTH: The United States is exceptional. The American character is distinctive in some regards (like in its religiosity, optimistic individualism, and disregard for other countries' interests) but these qualities don't consistently set the American people apart from the rest of the world. — Source

6

CRACKED.COM MYTH: The Founding Fathers had a shared vision for the country. If we wanted to ask What would the Founding Fathers think?, we wouldn't even know who to ask. There are never-ending debates among historians who is even counted as a Founding Father. Among the individuals considered, they had very conflicting views. — Source

5

CRACKED.COM MYTH: Martin Luther King Jr. was a beloved leader during his life. King was an incredibly famous yet divisive figure. At the year of his death, he had an unfavorable rating of 63%. The FBI even attempted to blackmail him to commit suicide. Within civil rights circles, he was criticized for both being too radical and not radical enough. — Source

4

CRACKED.COM MYTH: State with the most serial killers? Must be Florida, or California. REALITY: It's Alaska. Proportional to its population, Alaska wins this one with around 15.65 serial killings per one million inhabitants. It's followed by Nevada, then Florida. Criminologists speculate that it might be due to the cover of darkness during those long Alaskan winter nights. The isolation of the state's remote locations might also play a part. — Source

3

CRACKED.COM Everybody knows that Jamaica is a stoner country, right? Nope! Jamaica strictly banned all forms of marijuana use until 2015. Even now, they allow only 2 ounces per person. In comparison, Colorado legalized marijuana sooner than Jamaica! — Source

2

GRACKED.COM Afraid to go to Australia because of the sharks, snakes, and crocodiles? Those aren't even Australia's deadliest animals anyway. In deaths per decade... 90 85 80 75 77 70 65 60 55 50 45 44 40 35 33 30 25 27 20 18 15 16 16 14 10 9 5 0 Bees Dogs Other Snakes Sharks Bovines Crocodiles Kangaroos Horses, ponies, and donkeys — Source

1

Oh, Canada, where medical treatment is provided by public hospitals and paid for by the government. EMERGE not anada Unless that treatment RU involves medication. You're to pay and for expected medication. CRACKED.COM — Source

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