12 Slugs Share Their Deepest Hopes and Dreams

Can the slimy among us not strive for greatness?
12 Slugs Share Their Deepest Hopes and Dreams

Even a lowly slug has larger dreams than melting in salt, despised.

See Their Name in the Broadway Lights

12 Slugs Share Their Deepest Hopes and Dreams

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“I can imagine it now… STARRING: A SLUG.

Dunking A Basketball

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“Once I learn to gain momentum in any way, Im nearly there.”

World Peace

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“Why cant we all get along?”

World War

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“This world demands a cleansing fire.”

To Be Less Beautiful

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“I just want to be able to walk around the block without being mobbed by model agents looking for the face of their fall collection.”

A 1970 Ford Mustang Boss 429 Fastback

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“And a stretch of open road to really let that baby purr.

To Steal A Snail’s Shell and Join Their Ranks

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“If I can pry that sucker off, hell forever be demoted to our lowly status, while Ill be living it up in Snail City!”

A Girlfriend

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“Not a slug either. I want a HUMAN girlfriend, I want her tall, and I want her to step on me!”

Escape Generational Poverty

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“This society exists to prop up the slugs born into upper-middle-class families gardens, and leaves behind those of us born behind a 7-Eleven dumpster.

Get A Bit of That Sno-Cone

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“Just a lucky drop… I dont know what that sweet blue is, but I know it would send papa to another plane entirely.”

A Complete Overhaul of the U.S. Office of Veteran Affairs

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“I fought for this country, and when I got back, they kicked me to the curb. Literally!

???

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“Whats a slug? Im a slug? What does that mean? Hello?”

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